Bar association
If there were an award for the year's most politically incorrect memoir, a strong contender would be Tucker Max's ''I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell" (Citadel Press), in which the 30-year-old Duke University Law School grad chronicles many bouts of drinking and debauchery in a manner that would do Rabelais -- or Howard Stern -- proud.
Max, who'll be appearing at Boston University's George Sherman Union today from 5-8 p.m., also maintains a website full of more salty remembrances of flings past. He checked in by phone this week.
Q. You really are going to hell, aren't you?
A. I don't believe in hell in the spiritual sense. But in a metaphorical sense, yes.
Q. No thoughts of repenting?
A. I don't know what I'd repent for. I'm not St. Augustine, bro.
Q. Red-blooded hetero American or guy with deviance issues?
A. Define ''deviant." I'm not into weird sexual things. I've never done drugs. I drink a lot, but if I break any laws it's usually by accident.
Q. How's your health?
A. I'm in great shape. I'm 30 years old. I work out. Why wouldn't I be?
Q. Maybe because your alcohol consumption sounds dangerously high?
A. These stories are true, but they're only a slice of my life. People think I'm drunk 24 hours a day, which is ridiculous. I drink what an average guy my age drinks. Probably two to three times a week, 10 to 15 drinks a night.
Q. Who attends your book signings?
A. Girls who want to hook up with me, guys who want to be me, and everything in between. My biggest fan base is 16- to 24-year-olds.
Q. You say you didn't exaggerate or make things up, but how reliable is your memory after 15 drinks?
A. Even if I black out at 3 a.m., how could I not remember what I did before? And if I don't, I ask friends who were there. Also, let's be honest, I'm not writing the Warren Commission Report.
Q. You got sued by a former Miss Vermont over what you wrote about her. What happened?
A. We dated for about a month. Later, she portrayed herself on her website as a role model for sobriety and abstinence -- when she could not have been more opposite in person. I'm the same way, but hey, don't lie about it. So I used her real name, which I never do. A year later, she sued me. The case got dropped, but it was a big deal because it was the first time prior restraint was used against an Internet writer.
Q. Any future plans to practice law?
A. (Laughs) If you were making $10,000 a month off a website and had a New York Times bestseller, would you practice law?
Q. Good question. How does your family feel about your career?
A. My mom cries a lot and asks me why I'm not a nice person. My dad didn't get it at first, but he does now.
Q. Where do you see yourself in five years?
A. I don't know, dude. But if you'd asked me the same question five years ago, there's no way I could have predicted this.
Q. Should we tell readers where you'll be after tonight's book signing?
A. Whenever I announce the location, things get out of control. I mean, I'm not Eminem, but so many people show up I can't even talk to the girls who are there to meet me.
JOSEPH P. KAHN 