A different kind of Scientology pageant

Did TomKat's weekend wedding whet your appetite for Scientology? You're in luck. Kyle Jarrow's Obie Award-winning play about L. Ron Hubbard's religion opens here Friday, and Tom Cruise is in the cast. Well, sort of. Since the stars of Boston Theatre Works's production of "A Very Merry Un authorized Children's Scientology Pageant" are kids, Katie Holmes's devoted husband is played by an 8-year-old, um, girl. "It's the 'Risky Business'-era Tom," explains Jarrow. (Celebrity Scientologists Kirstie Alley and John Travolta also make cameos.) The show, which got raves in New York and LA, draws heavily on Hubbard's own words to explain his bizarre dogma. Even still, we're told, the suits at the Church of Scientology are none too pleased with Jarrow's play. When it was in rehearsals in New York, the Rev. John Carmichael, who's president of the Church of Scientology in the Empire State and who was in Rome to see TomKat tie the knot, showed up unannounced to complain. "There was a look of extreme displeasure on his face," says Jarrow, who later received a rather ominous letter from Carmichael. "It was cleverly worded, but obviously meant to be threatening." Since Katie and Cruise are honeymooning in the Maldives, it's unlikely either will be in the house when the show opens.

Salinger’s ‘pen pal’ letters sold

J.D. Salinger's eccentric letters to a Massachusetts woman who had written the reclusive writer a nasty note were sold over the weekend for $35,250. Skinner Inc., which auctioned the correspondence yesterday at its Boston offices, wouldn't ID the woman, but said she was present when the 16 missives touching on movies and moon signs were sold to a dealer. The woman became improbable pen pals with "The Catcher in the Rye" author after she wrote him a letter in 1980 complaining about a story she read in People. (The mag had reported that Salinger once ordered his dog to attack a trespasser.) "She was basically lambasting him for being a curmudgeon," says Skinner VP Stuart Whitehurst. Salinger, who hasn't made a public appearance or even published anything since 1965, responded with letters about astrology, baseball, his interest in homeopathy, and films. So what do we learn about Holden Caulfield's creator? "He doesn't like 'Raiders of the Lost Ark,' but he liked Jessica Lange in 'King Kong,' " Skinner says.

Locals help out at ‘Comic Relief’ event

A few folks with local ties took part in this weekend's "Comic Relief" fund-raiser for Hurricane Katrina victims. South End animal-rights activist James Costa was a talent coordinator for the Vegas event, featuring Billy Crystal, Robin Williams, Whoopi Goldberg, and comedy's other big names, including Arlington's Dane Cook and New Hampshire native Sarah Silverman. Norwell's Jennifer Coolidge was there, as was Boston movie producer Laura Bernieri, and "Bones" costar and BU alum Emily Deschanel. Chef Emeril Lagasse of Fall River also pitched in from New Orleans.

Denis Leary's annual "BASH for New York's Bravest" took place Saturday in the Big Apple, and a crowd of boldfaced names showed up, including Senator John Kerry, Michael J. Fox, TV's Rachael Ray, and actress Dana Delany. Lest anyone think the Emerson alum's playing favorites, the "Rescue Me" star's Firefighters Foundation has been good to Boston's bravest as well, last year giving the BFD a 27-foot high-speed rescue boat worth $250,000.

We're told that Tony Award-winner Patti LuPone wowed them in Waltham over the weekend, where she performed two shows as part of the Reagle Players Celebrity Series.

Joe O'Donnell and Jack Connors were just a few of the tuxedoed business titans at the American Ireland Fund's 25th anniversary party, which drew over 1,000 people.

The ageless Chubby Checker did the twist at the Joslin Diabetes Center's gala Saturday. Car dealer Herb Chambers did his part for the great cause, bidding over $6,000 to be "Diner for a Day" on Billy Costa's "TV Diner." . . . While Hazel Mae and a mystery man dined at Morton's Saturday, they kept a close eye on the Ohio State-Michigan game playing on the bar's two plasma TVs. . . . Our invite to Big Papi's birthday party Saturday at the Roxy must have been lost in the mail.

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