A world of broken promises at Globe

So maybe visiting Globe Bar & Cafe isn't as bad as an episode of MTV's "Boiling Points," the reality show that finds victims, puts them in a stress sandwich, then sees how long it takes them to freak out.

But when you're lured in with the promise of homemade macaroni and cheese with caramelized ham, truffle oil, and bread crumbs, only to be informed by the always smiling, airhead waitress that it's all sold out, what you have is a sign of bogus things to come.

Nor do the prospects brighten when we find that our next choices, beer-battered fish and chips with fresh coleslaw, and calamari, are gone too. Oh, and despite a list of 10 or so martini concoctions, including the de rigueur sour apple-tini, the bartender is fresh out of martini glasses.

"Could you drink it out of a wineglass?" the perky one asks. We acquiesce and get stemware covered in lipstick smudges.

It doesn't get any more bogus than this. Nevertheless, we make up our minds to have a good time at Globe. Anyway, just in case this is "Boiling Points," we refuse to "lose it" like the poor woman who went to pick up her dog at day care only to be told the pet was lost, or the couple at the restaurant set upon by an annoying stranger, or the guy who attacked a computer technician for apparently losing everything on his hard drive.

We do this by smiling back at the waitress, finding other things on the menu that we can eat, and keeping in mind that this is Saturday night in Back Bay and every place within walking distance is wall-to-wall humanity. We are lucky to get a table, lucky to be alive and watching baseball on one of the dozens of flat-screen TVs (you can't get a liquor license in Boston without them, we guess).

Globe Bar & Cafe, which replaces White Star Tavern, which replaced Small Planet, has managed to retain the low-lit, cozy vibe of the previous occupants, and the many draft beers, wines by the glass, and less-than-$10 cocktails must certainly draw the after-work mobs.

The menu could be fairly described as cocktail-platter fusion, with crab cakes, spring rolls with tuna, bruschetta, Greek and Caesar salads, and smoked salmon plates. The portions are generous; the prices ($7.95 to $13.95 for almost everything) reasonable, especially in this part of town.

All of which can spell trouble when it comes to execution, but if you're hungry, you won't care that the "sushi-grade" tuna in the crispy spring rolls has been accidentally cooked to medium, or that "crispy" is a euphemism for "greasy." Those are the only culinary missteps, anyway. The Greek salad, loaded with caramelized red onions, fat olives, and an addictive, unsalty feta, feeds us adequately. A hot pressed vegetarian sandwich is dense with grilled eggplant, portobello mushroom, pepper-Jack cheese, and that throwback to California in the '80s, the sun-dried tomato.

We would say this is a romantic spot, with track lights and pendant lamps dimmed and the wood-paneled walls studded with sleek mirrors (providing unlimited opportunities to monitor our appearance). But the two-story ceiling does nothing to quell the din, and when we lose the thread of our conversation, we revert to watching TV. Just like at home.

Globe Bar & Cafe, 565 Boylston St., Back Bay, 617-778-6993.