Stranded in Fox's lair
When Rupert Murdoch said he requested the pleasure of my company, I took him at his word. I accepted the media tycoon's invitation to be his guest at this week's Radio and Television Correspondents dinner in D.C. I wasn't sure why Fox News wanted me there, and as the evening wore on, it became clear that the folks at Fox News weren't, either.
Held at the Hilton Washington, the annual gathering is an excuse for broadcast journalism's boldface names to meet, drink, and be merry. In all, about 1,600 people attended the black-tie event, including politicians, influence peddlers, and entertainers. Among the first people I ran into were hip-hop impresario Russell Simmons and his girlfriend, Porschla Coleman, who were guests of former presidential candidate Dennis Kucinich and his wife, Elizabeth.
I'd wanted to bring a date, too, but was told that would be impossible: This was a tough ticket, and there were absolutely no plus-ones. Oh, really? I e-mailed Geraldo Rivera - whom I'd profiled in the Globe last summer and have since kept in touch with - to see if he could score me a second invite. Rivera, who works for Fox News, pledged to try, but said spouses were historically unwelcome at the Radio and Television Correspondents dinner.
Why, I wondered.
"To encourage Spitzering," Rivera deadpanned in reply. "From the verb 'to Spitzer.' "
I attended solo. While other networks are in the habit of throwing parties after the dinner, Fox holds its VIP schmooze fest beforehand, in a cozy, air-conditioned tent with three bars and a string quartet. (Beer and liquor were served, but, inexplicably, red wine was not.)
Bill O'Reilly was among the early arrivals. Taller than I expected, the "Factor" host towered over his fellow talking heads Robert Novak, Oliver North, and Juan Williams, who were milling about in identical tuxedoes. (For a dash of color and to remind all of us of his military service, North had decorated his lapel with medals.)
O'Reilly paused at one point to have his picture taken by the ponytailed photographer hired for the evening by Fox. Since he was alone, I offered to pose with O'Reilly. He looked at me, glowered, and walked away.
Next in was Fox News anchor Shepard Smith, who was happy to chat, at least for a while. We were talking about football - Shep's a big fan - when I made the mistake of disparaging Giants quarterback Eli Manning. Turns out Smith and Manning are both Ole Miss alums.
"You don't watch my show, do you?" Smith said, smiling severely.
Sure, I said, I've seen it a few times. And with that, we shook hands and said goodbye.
Chris Wallace wandered past, his right arm in a sling. Holding out my left hand, I introduced myself, but Wallace kept on walking, explaining that he had to say hello to "the boss." That, as every employee of Fox News knows, is Roger Ailes. The network CEO is easy to spot in the crowd: He's the guy whose ring everyone kisses. (Ailes graciously greeted most guests, but refused to pose with the Huffington Post's Rachel Sklar, telling her he doesn't appreciate the website's "negative comments" about Fox.)
At last, the dinner bell rang and a long, slow-moving line of bow-tied old boys stretched from the bar to the vast ballroom. It was like a scene from "Happy Feet." I was at a table with Holbrook native and former White House chief of staff Andy Card, Harvard grad and onetime Homeland Security head Tom Ridge, and fetching "Fox & Friends" cohost Alyson Camerota, who used to work at Channel 7 and confided that she'd like nothing better than to return to Boston.
The after-dinner speaker, comedian Mo Rocca, was a joke, and not in a good way. When Dick "Darth Vader" Cheney delivers more funny lines, there's a problem. Senators Chuck Schumer and Joe Biden and MSNBC host Joe Scarborough wisely hit the exits before Rocca was finished.
I was invited to CNN's after-party at the Russia House Restaurant, but I felt obliged to dance with the "date" who brung me.
"Maybe we'll see you later," said Fox News flack Richard White as we got up from the table.
And maybe not. As the room emptied, I roamed around, running into Maine Senator Olympia Snowe, "NewsHour" anchor Jim Lehrer, and "Hardball" host Chris Matthews. Bored, I texted my friends at Fox. "Where's the party?" No answer. "Doing anything fun?" Silence. Hmm. I'd been dropped. I headed to the hotel bar to catch the highlights of the Red Sox game, and on the way passed conservative talk-show host Laura Ingraham fixing her lipstick. The Sox had been beaten by the Yankees, but then I bumped into a well-known political operative from Massachusetts, who was enjoying a drink with an attractive young woman. "Is this your wife?" I asked. No, he replied. We swapped stories for a while longer, and then I left. I had to get up early and he was busy Spitzering. Names can be reached at names@globe.com or at 617-929-8253. .content> 