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‘New Moon’ units

By Terri Schwartz
Globe Correspondent / November 19, 2009

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Vampires have taken a bite out of pop culture, thanks in no small part to the massive success of the “Twilight’’ books and films. To keep rabid fans of the series appeased, stores from Hot Topic to Toys R Us to Nordstrom have been pumping out all kinds of merchandise to fulfill fans’ every wish (unless, of course, that wish involves getting face time with Edward Cullen himself). With the opening of the second “Twilight’’ film, “New Moon,’’ mere hours from now, here’s a look at some of the most bizarre, ridiculous, and unnecessary “Twilight’’-related paraphernalia out there.

Not the sharpest tool

Really? A “Twilight’’ letter opener?

Vampire’s kiss

A lip gloss described as a “venom-laced liquid lip conditioner with a super potent bite (watch out!)’’ sounds, er, potentially popular among “Twilight’’ fans. Online make-up retailer DuWop is marketing their $16 Twilight Venom lip gloss nationwide, everywhere from Bath and Body Works to Borders.

Rev your engine

There’s nothing better to complement your new license plate frame than a shiny new Edward Cullen Volvo. Yes, Swedish car company Volvo is holding a contest to give away a Volvo XC60, the car Edward drives in “New Moon.’’

Flip your lid

Cafe Press is a website known for its create-your-own-anything products. Well, fans submitted 1,210 “Twilight’’ designs, which means there are 1,210 different $150 to $200 Flip camcorders available for purchase. Yep, that’s 1,210. And 526 license plate frames. This is what your 14-year-old daughter is doing while she should be studying American History. Just saying.

Board to death

Lifesize cardboard cutouts aren’t new (you can get one of Darth Vader or Captain Jack Sparrow at your local Newbury Comics or FYE), but “Twilight’’ has opened up a whole new range of $35 cutout possibilities. Edward Cullen in a suit or in school garb - how does one choose?

Sticky situation

Moving somewhere and want to be sure the US Postal Service knows you’re a “Twilight’’ fan? Hot Topic is selling wolf-pack themed packing tape for $10.

Stalker chic?

If a man you knew - even one you liked - came up to you half naked with a dark look in his eye and told you, “I will always be there for you. I’ll never go away,’’ chances are you’d feel a little uncomfortable. Yet Hot Topic is marketing a whole series of these T-shirts for about $20, featuring some of the most cheesy “Twilight’’ lines imaginable. Would you wear a shirt that says: “The only reason I left you was to protect you’’? Wait a minute. Don’t answer that.

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