Critic's corner

By Matthew Gilbert

PICKS FOR MARCH 23, 2007

Karaoke-Dokey 9:30 p.m., CMT
Shania-aspire.

The Backyardigans Noon, Nickelodeon
For the kiddlenecks.

Acceptable TV 10 p.m., VH1
An alternative to YouTube, the alternative to TV. Free me, Escher.

GET YOUR PAGEANT ON

Miss USA

9 p.m., Channel 7
Will the ratings of Donald Trump's contest benefit from the controversy about reigning queen Tara Conner's (left) underage drinking? I'm sure Trump is hoping so. Nancy O'Dell will host the 56th annual show, which airs live from the Kodak Theatre in Hollywood.

Wedding Bells 9 p.m., Channel 25
An effeminate groom. Fianc-gay or metrosexual?

This American Life 8 p.m., Showtime
A bull clone. Sounds like a term for a TV newsmag.

ON DEMAND

The Descent

Comcast
A British horror movie that leaves you exactly where you want to be at a flick about six outdoorsy women (with Natalie Mendoza and Saskia Mulder, above) stranded in a cave underground -- afraid of how in the dark you are, literally and otherwise. The setup is like a bad lesbian drama, but that's a ruse for the suspenseful terrors lurking in that cave: highly evolved batmen looking for dinner. A future cult classic for sure.(R; shows through May 26) — Wesley Morris