More Alma & Oscar

A local museum professional, who asks to go unnamed, has written additional verses for Tom Lehrer's masterpiece.

She once had a fling with an Osckah,
a painter who fell for her bad.
(His name, by the way, was Kokoschka;
She drove him a little bit mad...)

For when she decamped from their maison
(he didn't leave her, you'll recall)
He memorialized their liaison
by filling her place with a doll!

Alma, tell us,
All modern women are jealous--
For if Oskar was one of your cons
You still had Gustav and Walter and Franz!