A charitable night for 'Idol'

How kind and gentle is "American Idol"? So kind, so gentle, that on the night of its gigantic poverty telethon, nobody has to go home.

That was the substance of the "most shocking result in our history," which host Ryan Seacrest kept plugging last night during the two-hour "Idol Gives Back." One by one, Seacrest declared each contestant safe, including Jordin Sparks , the last to be named. She didn't look scared -- everyone grinned through the results, suggesting that the finalists knew the secret -- but later she cried . Her parents, in the audience, looked mildly disturbed.

"How could we let anybody go on charity night?" Seacrest intoned, but he assured us that "Idol" will soon reclaim its trademark meanness. This week's votes will be added to next week's, and on May 2, the bottom two contestants will leave.

In some ways, that will be a relief: a return to the "Idol" we love, or love to hate. But that shouldn't diminish the value of the show's newfound generosity. It's easy to be cynical about the self-importance, the celebrities sharing the limelight, the contestants in glistening white suits (somehow, Chris Richardson's had a hoodie). But whatever the motivations here -- good intentions, good publicity -- who's to argue, if good causes get real help?

The night was peppered with videos, showing African and American children in need. Some were quite moving: Seacrest demonstrated his heart, and his appeal, when he comforted an African orphan. The questions that came to mind had mainly to do with how thinly contributions might be spread, and how much the stars had contributed themselves.

There were many stars on board, from Ellen DeGeneres , who co hosted from LA's Walt Disney Concert Hall, to Kelly Clarkson , who performed there. Madonna sent a message from Malawi. Celine Dion did a duet with a hologrammed Elvis Presley that, if creepy, was technically stunning.

There was comic relief, too, the best of it from Jack Black , who asked the judges to rate his rendition of "Kiss From a Rose."

"It's from ['Batman Forever'] " he said. "The most sensitive of all the 'Batmans.' "

It was a welcome nod to the weirdness of the night ; still, good feelings won out. When Simon Cowell said Black's performance was "better than Sanjaya," the cameras cut to recently ousted Sanjaya Malakar . He was clapping wildly, in the spirit of publicity, or generosity, or both.