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The psychology of the booty call
From The Journal of Sex Research [subscribers only], in an article titled, "The 'Booty Call': A Compromise Between Men's and Women's Ideal Mating Strategies." The study drew on the responses of 61 undergraduates at the University of Texas, 69 percent of whom were women. The following passage is excerpted from the "General Discussion":
In two studies, we found support for our predictions. First, women reported receiving more booty calls (although men did not report initiating more). Second, various communication methods are used to establish booty calls, with the telephone being the most popular method. Third, with regards to accepting versus rejecting booty call partners, physical attractiveness was considered the most important criteria by both genders. Fourth, whereas men tended to cite other reasons related to sexual access, women tended to cite reasons related to friendship, compatibility, and personality. Fifth, for booty calls that do not progress into long-term relationships, both genders attribute the lack of progression to the man's not wanting a long-term relationship. Taken together, our results suggest that, although booty calls are mostly a sexual relationship whereby physical attractiveness is important, there are elements in which booty calls differ from other casual sexual relationships, such as one-night stands or hookups. In addition, whereas men tend to favor the sexual aspects of booty calls, women tend to favor other, more long-term oriented considerations. These findings are consistent with our overall hypothesis that the booty call may represent a compromise between the short-term, sexual nature of men's ideal relationships and the long-term, commitment ideally favored by women.
The authors offer, in the form of the following graph, a taxonomy of sexual relationships, from faithful marriage to the one-night stand:
Other nuggets from the article, which was written by Peter K. Jonason, a psychologist at New Mexico State University, and Norman P. Li and Margaret J. Cason, of the University of Texas, also academic psychologists:
The second most important reason for acceptance and rejection [of a booty solicitation] was the timing of the booty call request. Friendship was a important factor in accepting, but not in rejecting, booty calls.… Those who pursued booty calls that were accepted for reasons relating to sexual desire reported more booty calls.
The most likely reasons for why a booty call relationship did not transition to a long-term relationship centered on the sexual nature of the booty call relationship.
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Sorry but I am older than 22, so please explain the difference between booty calls and "other casual sexual relationships, such as one-night stands or hookups"
What is a booty call and how does it differ from one night stands or "friends with benefits"?
Um. What exactly is a "booty call relationship"?
Seriously? Aren't there more important things to study?
hehehehe...they said 'booty'
One night stand: You have sex with them once
Booty call: someone you only see for sex
Hook up: generally a friend you mess around with once or twice
Friends with benefits: someone you see in social settings and have sex regularly
A booty call is when you call someone you want to sleep with, could be a friend, ex-girlfriend, basically someone you have some type of relationship with. Booty calls often happen when one or both people are drunk, such as the drunken text message or phone call, but can happen because one person has nothing else to do, or are just interested in sleeping with this certain person. Often, from a male point of view, it people you call in this manner are viewed as attractive and likeable enough to sleep with, but not to have a long term relationship with. Im sure there are plenty of situations where roles are reversed though. One night stands are when you meet someone out, and sleep with them that night but usually dont see them again. If you do see them again, its not a one night stand anymore, aand nothing that comes after is either. Friends with Benefits is different in that this is someone that you have a relatively in depth relationship with and whom you dont only see to have sex. But you arent tied to one another and can usually see other people if you want.
Booty call seems to indicate a recurrent activity, whereas one night stand indicates a single event. Friends with benefits - the benefits part is the "booty call"
A booty call is basically a late-night call to someone solely for the purpose of hooking up. It is often not a one-night stand (which implies one night only), as it may occur on several occasions. A booty call often takes place at the end of an unsuccessful night at the bar - meaning you did not meet someone else to have a one-night stand with. So the booty call can be a sign of general low-interest by the caller in the person called. A friend with benefits is just that - a good friend with whom one engages in sexual activity. That relationship may involve booty calls for the said reasons above (no one else available, unsuccessful "hunting" night, just horny). A booty call these days is often enacted via text message with the sole purpose of engaging in after-hours sexual activity. Obviously women have a very different idea about the purpose of said booty call, but as a man I can assure you we only partake in the booty call when we have almost zero interest in dating you. So be warned.
best
study
ever
Here is some advice from the "player" side. The booty call is when a man (or a woman) calls up a woman (or woman) strictly for the intention of having sex. The traditional booty call occurs late night, say after 2am, after the clubs close and the "player" has not found any other women to hook up with. So, he goes for the "booty call." However, a booty call could occur at any time. In fact the real player may challenge himself and find it more interesting to call at a later hour and to consider that a bigger prize (e.g. "I booty called her at 3am, woke her up, and went over her place, etc. etc.").
Remember, this is not friends with benefits, as you pursue no other relations with this person aside from the sexual relationship. It is also not a one night stand, since once you find a booty call woman, you are apt to keep her high on the list of "booty callers" and call her again.
Enough said. Good luck players!
The subtitle of this column is "Illuminating thoughts from the world of ideas". What part of the word "illuminating" is being misunderstood? This article makes no more sense than the journal article it is quoting. No illumination is occuring here, folks. I hope no one is paid actual money to put this together (notice I didn't say to write this since no actual writing occurs here).
A booty call is normally with someone you already know and are attracted to, but don't want to relationship with. Being "Friends w/ Benefits" is similar. A hook up or one night stand is just that, someone you meet at a bar or other social situation and decide to have sex with.
there is difference between booty calls and friends with benefits. Booty call is someone youm eet and casually have sex with when in need, this is different from a one night stand because that is a one night thing which u never never i say never speak or see that person again. a friends with benefit is a friend who you have decided to cross the friendship line with but yet maintain that friendship without any long term commitments.
At least tell us if this was a self-report measure, or who conducted it. For those who are asking the question "what is a booty call relationship", it is one in which two people connect to have intimate relations (sex). The connection is made via a more casual request (as the article states, often via phone or other technology). The two people engaging in the sexual activity know each other, but are not close friends (that is usually known as "friends with benefits") and usually do not interact with each other on a regular basis.
So like the little chart shows, it falls pretty much between "friends with benefits" and one-night stands. Yeah there are more important things to spend money on, but every little research piece like this can lead to bigger, more important questions about the psychological nature of human sexual interaction.
I think I've found the 10+ different descriptions of booty call, one-night stand, etc than the article itself.
Good to know there is some important research going on in the world! :)
OK, now I understand. When you receive a booty call, that means you're the ugly girl that guys are only interested in when they can't get themselves what they really want.
And these women actually say yes? Talk about self-esteem issues! You may as well be a guy's personal blow-up doll - that's nasty.
As someone who is not at all interested in either booty calling anybody or being booty called, I always say "thanks but no thanks" whenever I get one.
It's one way of weeding out the people I don't want to know. Happy hunting elsewhere all you booty callers out there.
This seems to be more a study of jargon than behavior
Mark B...
or your worst nightmare...VISE-VERSA
I am a 20 year old girl. I get the "booty call" every now and then. BUT when I call this guy, i am suddenly a sl"t?... why is it okay for guys to call but girls cannot... please explain.
What self-respecting woman would allow herself to be a booty call !!! Wake up, ladies!!! You are a treasure worth fighting for. Don't give away the goods to some low-life bottom dwellers! Be a lady and demand to be treated like one, too!!!
One night stands are fantastic after you have just gotten broken up with and hate the world. Who hasn't done that. LOL
ienjoythesecalls, you're calling the wrong guy.
Where does alcohol and Chinese food fit in?
MarkB, You'd be surprised by how many many women booty call as well. In my past life, I have been booty called by girls I knew. It was usually the same story as dthem said only on the women side.
They go out on the town looking for Mr Right and find nothing but duds. They don't do 1 night stands but need someone so as not to feel like a complete loser who will spend the rest of their life as a spinster so they call their booty call guy friends.
Dude... give me a break. Do as ye will
Um...did it really take a team of researchers to figure out what anyone under the age of 40 already knows from either living life or watching HBO? If so, how do I get in on this kind of grant funding? I have an idea for the next project: My Humps - A study on if men like them.
@Stately Lady
Some people like whoring themselves out. That's just the way it is. Different strokes for different folks. This goes for both males and females. I am a male and there was a time where I used to essentially whorre myself out, but I've kind of matured and moved beyond that. Some people don't do it quite as quickly as others. Men can be booty calls as well, don't think it doesn't happen both ways because it can and does. (It's happened to me).
Where Amazing Happens.
stately lady-.... sometimes a girls gotta do... what a girls gotta do.
I have never gotten one.
Is this anything other than free prostitution?
Legalizing prostitution looks like a better idea all the time. At least "sexwerkers" have to take precautions and submit to regular health screenings.
Cutting and pasting from research study does not constitute 'news'. Maybe following up on the publication by interviewing the authors, or other scientists in that field and making some conclusions about the usefulness or application of the research could allow you to develop an article that was actually 'news' (still loosely defined) rather than merely filling boston.com's coverpage with a headline that people click just because it contains the words 'booty call'. Scientists have to do more than just provide a catchy title and the data, they have to interpret it in a context, and make conclusions, and so should the author of this story.
Also, you're behind the times--this was published last February.
I invite Christopher Shea to respond, if so inclined.
I'm a married woman who received my share of attempted booty calls when I was younger. Especially in college. I don't think it is always a sign of disrepect. After college, I ended up dating one former booty caller who admitted that he was shy about asking me out and liked to use the fact that he was drunk as an excuse to contact me.
There was only one booty call that I ever answered. It was a friend of a friend who I hooked up with one night. The sex was amazing. After that we went on a date or two to try to make it work, but the chemistry was not there. The dude was dumber than a box of rocks, but in bed, it was another story. I answered his booty calls on and off for about a year. I will never regret it.
This has absolutely nothing to do with prostitution. If you think it does, then you are a prostitute to your spouse. If money IS exchanged, then it is prostitution.
I tell you, there are so many people on these boards still living in the dark ages - they've got this thought that women have no sexual desires at all.
MarkB is completely incorrect - the person to receive the booty call may be of average looks with a hot body, or any other variations. For those that call they are horny and want some action, but do not want a relationship with that person. I had an ex-girlfriend like that, incredibly beautiful, but was a spaz and impossible to deal with any longer than 1 day.
I love to have botty calls with Tuna, he is such a good man, through in spongebob everyone once in a while
It is nothing like prostitution...both parties are just in it for the sex. These could be two friends (its actually more likely that they are at the least on friendly terms) they know eachother so there is no danger.
Where do I sign up for a prospective study on this? I'll be the guinea pig!!!
JustYourAverageGirl -
You must be very, very young if you name HBO as a reliable source of world wisdom.
What about women who SAY they want a LTR, but never progress to that supposed goal. Why? No LTR for them, by their own choice, because they are having too much fun accepting booty calls!
It's called playing the field, but not seeing the forest for the, um, TREES. LOL!!
In other words, this is just another man-slam by supposed sexperts.
Besides, all the self-respecting girl has to do is say "NO". Or not even pick up the phone at 3 AM.
This so-called research IMHO is a pile of doo-doo.
This study is from February.
Not exactly late-breaking.
@keno
Has it ever occurred to you that a woman can have sexual desires without laying herself out as a doormat? You sound upset that the free prostitutes might start charging.
@Jill,
This article, unless I'm somehow mistaken, is in the current issue of the journal.
Also, you'll notice, if you scroll down, that I do a number of different kinds of items on this blog. Sometimes I do what you recommend: interview scholars and write a traditional "news" item. Other times I post brief links or, yes, cut and paste interesting nuggets of one sort or another. (It's a blog, after all.)
I'll post some follow-up information about the study soon--someone asked about the methodology--but the excerpt I posted offers a pretty good summary of it. I didn't treat the article as a titillating goof *or* as a groundbreaking discovery.
I appreciate your readership, and your criticisms.
The report (article?) was originally printed in a medical journal/publication. No doubt paid for under the guise of medical research. And some people wonder why health care costs are out of control. This folks is what part of your $ 13,000.00 annual health insurance premiums is getting you.
Pathetic.
The booty call needn't be just with a casual acquaintance. You can have a booty call with a long-time GF/BF; it happens all the time:
So you're in your house, say on a Wednesday. It was lousy outside last weekend, you didn't see the GF, she was busy, wanted to stay indoors, or whatever. So it's been 10 days or so without a trip to the well and you get to...ah... er... *thinking*, and decide to pay the GF a call. A booty call. At 10:30. On a weeknight.
Me: (rings bell)
GF: (answers door. In nightie or sweats or whatever, but certauinly not a peignoir or anything). "Dick! What are you doing here? It's Wednesday! Why didn't you just call?"
Me: "I... um... ah... er..."
GF: "Is this a booty call? You little worm."
Sound familiar? After all, "There are only two or three human stories, and they go on repeating themselves as fiercely as if they had never happened.” (Willa Cather)
@ pro-booty call
"It is nothing like prostitution...both parties are just in it for the sex."
... as opposed to prostitution where both parties are in it to hold hands.
And are you really so naive to think that just because you know someone, there is "no danger"?
What this article fails to articulate is how a regular married guy like me can acquire a list of attractive women whom I can call late at night to placate my more carnal desires. For free. And their needs won't even factor into any of it. Is there a directory somewhere? Where can I find these amazing selfless women? Mainstream media has conditioned me to think this is not the way actual women behave. I've been sleeping at night like a fool, when apparently there's a subculture of extremely low self-esteem hotties out there providing a valuable service I could benefit from.
Any form of sexual relationship with another, such as a booty call, is perfectly acceptable as long as all parties involved are on the same page....... some people initially start off with strict intentions of a booty call and then let their emotions get the best of them creating a dramatic issue.. i've seen this happen one too many times...
so as a comment kind of springing off of the initial topic..... booty call go-ers try to keep it real with one another and keep your ish straight.
mmmmmhmmm
Booty calls are not just for people who are drunk. I am not a drinker and i have had a few booty call "relationships" with men who are not drunk.
"In addition, whereas men tend to favor the sexual aspects of booty calls, women tend to favor other, more long-term oriented considerations."
Calling the Nobel Committee!
"No booty call video": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5cEZQxcfbWA
This Liam Show video should shed a lot of funny amusing light on the Booty Call..
- Chex
All this never would have happened if it hadn't been for that vulgar 70's tune "(Shake, Shake, Shake) Shake Your Booty".
61 undergraduates? Seems like an awfully small sample size.
This study is full of sexist garbage. The idea that women want relationships and men just want sex is oversimplistic and archaic. Society punishes women for being sexually free and excuses men for the same impulses. Men who want relationships are deemed momma's boys. It's all junk science.
She said... "I am a 20 year old girl. I get the "booty call" every now and then. BUT when I call this guy, i am suddenly a sl"t?... why is it okay for guys to call but girls cannot... please explain."
Still, in 2009... If you sleep around you are a "sl*t". I'm sorry to tell you this but although young girls today think they're hip or just like guys... guys still think you're a pig for giving it up so easily. Even when they act like you're cool while you're around. You'd be shocked by what they say about you to their friends. I know girls have needs too but lets be honest... why are you tossing it to everyone? I doubt it's just self-gratification. Biologically speaking, that doesn't make sense meanwhile biologically, we know why guys do it. Years ago, girls had all the control and had some respect for themselves. Guys had to work for it... you've lost so much. Not to mention the rampant STD problem (which by the way, effects girls way more including fertility). You'll be annoyed with my comments now, but when you're 30 you'll say... Oh My God, she was right. I'm not trying to criticize you personally. I'm sure you're a great girl but seriously, have some respect for yourself. Booty call... that is so not cool for girls!
@ "If money IS exchanged, then it is prostitution. "
Hmmm.....or some *really* kinky kind of roleplaying.
Get out of the Dark Ages people! Why are you a whore because you accept booty calls. The bottom line is this, everyone wants to be satisfied every now and then. What if you don't have a boyfriend or a girlfriend and don't want one? Are you limited only to a piece of plastic? I just recently got out of an 11 year marriage. I'm not looking for another relationship. I like the idea of having a designated partner to whom I owe nothing. As long as I'm not taking money for my escapade or jumping at every man that glances in my direction, what is the problem?
I think it was a good study to point out how things have changed - mostly with womens' views on sex - since the sexual revolution of the 60's - there are now several different types of relationships between men and women - these relationships have existed always - it's just talked about now and open - it's like a snowflake - every relationship is unique! If it works, who's to judge?
booty?
Slimmay down a slab o dat pota house, an awn de drink side - ah haba jaba.
BossMum hit the nail on the head.
I do want to add that I once asked a young lady who was involved in a "booty call" relationship why she did that activity. She said that her boyfriend was in prison, they guy she was "booty calling" had a long distance serious girlfriend, and they honestly felt that their activities kept them happy, but not "cheating" on their respective "others"
To each their own, but I know from experience, BossMum spoke the truth. The guys who tell you soothingly that you have a right to your own sexual identity want only one thing, and it isn't to boost your ego.
Quick question on this booty call process -
what if a guy shows up at 2AM at a girls house for a booty call..she is is a good friend of this guy.They are both equally atrractive, the girl likes him as a friend, but she does do booty calls or want to have sex. Does she just say no? What are the rules here?
Just wondering...this is an interesting concept.
Thanks
My goodness, I think I liked it better when we were all Puritans. Thank God I don't have a daughter.
Really, a study. Seriously a study. Why? How much you want to bet the people conducting the study never got a booty call. Let me tell you a secret mr. researcher, woman love sex, yeah thats right, if you don't have 2 heads and smell not to bad all you have to do is ask. Rejection is part of the game but without it there is never any ejectio......you get the picture.
The second most important reason for acceptance and rejection [of a booty solicitation] was the timing of the booty call request.
I find this to be very accurate:
a) Never call after the trains have stopped for the night if your friend is on the other side of town and you are drunk, as this conversation never seems to go anywhere
b) Never call when you are so drunk that you drop your phone mid-sentence and pass out, as your friend assumes you have died and then she will try to find someone else to hook up with
c) Always know what state your friend is in, as randomly calling a booty call that actually has a boyfriend in New York leads to trouble on subsequent booty calls
d) Never start the process of a booty call when your pals are around, that's just a buzzkill due to the whole suspicious sounds of loud conversation on your end of the phone
First of all a few comments to the many:
"Playas"- if you feel the need to call yourself that, you're an idiot and probably actually 'play' less than you think.
"Married Guy"- you're an [deleted] and I hope your wife is participating in a friends with benefits relationship that will help her through the divorce from an incensitive CLOD like you.
"Lady"-however 'stately' you may regard yourself I'm sad for you that you are missing out on an activity that can be wonderfully recreational between two people that enjoy each others company, if only for limited things.
"MarkB"-by assuming the girls getting these are ugly and have no self esteem shows your bitter and may feel just that way about yourself but look on the bright side I bet your mom thinks you're very handsome.
"Bossmum"-aka a 30 year old who slept around too much in her 20's and is trying to be like poor stately who never had the chance. I'm 40 and don't have the time or the patience for a LTR right now but would enjoy a benefits or bootycall 'relationship' with a single person that I find mutual attractivness in with an occasional satisfying romp in the sheets.
Basically people who consider themselves to be adults and make certain choices, just try to be smart about them and/or have a friend that won't let you find yourself in what you may later feel was a compromising position. LIVE your life! It's a one time around folks, make smart choices, have fun,
respect yourself and others. Hold your head high and enjoy yourselves. Do your best to be and make smart descisions, if you make a supposed 'mistake' learn from it and move on. Most importantly ALWAYS ALWAYS use condoms. They sell 'em to everyone just about everywhere. Buy them and use them that's the difference between being used and just going along for the ride...pun intended.
wow, who knew so many people even read this blog
The people who focus on 'self-esteem' reasons for women wanting Booty Calls seem to not be able to percieve or understand that women themselves do in fact get horny. Its almost as if you don't believe that to be the case. In their minds the ONLY reason a woman would want to have sex would be to get something in return and only in the context of a committed relationship.
What I DO definitively know is that studies have shown that up to 24% of all women have some form of sexual dysfunction, where they are unable to achieve orgasm. I think most women who criticize other women for sleeping around may come from this group as they genuinely don't 'get' what all the fuss is about in regards to sex.
How sad.
What about guys who are in a relationship and cheat on their girlfriend on a regular basis? Is he missing out on something with his GF or is he just an ass?
This blogger might want to review your comment before posting it.
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