When Do Wedding Rings Expire?

A widow's sad but hopeful decision. Plus apartment sharing, meeting the CEO, and more.

When is it proper for a widow and a widower to remove their wedding rings if they are involved in a new committed and loving relationship?
E.K. in Boston

When their hearts so move them and when they've got their stories straight in case anyone notices. And mazel tov, my dears. Mazel tov.

I am moving into a two-bedroom, two-bath apartment with a roommate. It has a larger master bedroom with a master bath and a smaller second bedroom with a bathroom that is entered from the common area. We would both prefer the master suite. What is the best way to decide who gets the bigger bedroom, and should that person compensate the roommate who got the less desirable accommodations?
B.C. in Southborough

Unless there are significant and relevant differences between you and your roomie (say, one of you will be traveling much of the time), the most impartial way to resolve it I can think of is to decide in advance what percentage of the rent the larger room is worth. (Prorate the square footage and adjust from there depending on amenities.) Then flip a coin to decide who gets it. Determining the rent breakdown and any other conditions before you know who gets the bigger suite will help ensure that the deal is perceived as fair by both of you.

I work for a large company and occasionally see the CEO in the hall. I'll nod hello or say hi, but we have no other direct contact beyond that. Awhile back, I saw him and his family at a restaurant. Should I acknowledge him and say hello, or mind my own business? He may or may not know who I am. He lives near me so I want to be polite the next time, but thought it might be intrusive to say something during his "off time."
L.J. in Wellesley

Take a bit of initiative; it's never a bad thing to have an excuse to bring one's self to the attention of the CEO! The next time you run into him when he's alone and doesn't appear to be in a rush, introduce yourself. "Mr. Big- boss, we've not been introduced. I'm L.J., and I work in tech support. We live in the same neighborhood and I've seen you around once or twice, so I thought I should introduce myself." He'll make some pleasantry, you'll make one in return, you'll go on your way. Then you'll know each other and can behave as acquaintances do when they happen to meet in public, saying hello and making a bit of small talk without getting in each other's way.

Like you, I have a PhD in psychology and am a college professor. How do we convey to the folks in the doctor's office that they should use our appropriate title? Recently I went in to get some blood work done, and the technician came into the waiting room and called out "Judy." She was about half my age, and I felt really insulted. If it were the president of Harvard, would someone just come into the waiting room and call out "Drew"? How can we get medical professionals to treat us with some respect?
J.J. in Cambridge

I don't know Drew Faust personally, but she might well prefer to be called by her first name rather than announced as "President Faust," and wonder if everyone else who was in the waiting room was going to be writing gossipy e-mails about her ("OMG I saw Drew Faust going in for a mammogram!"). Technicians and receptionists usually call people by their first names in waiting rooms to protect their privacy. If you prefer another mode of address, just go to the desk when you check in and ask them to announce you as "Ms. Jones," or what have you. (Personally, I feel that "Dr." or "Professor" outside of the classroom is pretentious.) Similarly, tell the doctor how you prefer to be addressed.

But don't assume bad intent, as getting them "to treat us with some respect" suggests. Think of yourself, instead, as simply informing people what respect, to you, looks like.

Friends generously gave our son a check for a confirmation gift. However, they forgot to sign it. My husband thinks we should mention the check was unsigned the next time we see our friends, while I'm afraid we will be too forward if we tell them.
B.L. in Newton

B.L., has it ever occurred to you that sometimes people write to Miss Conduct and say, "I gave a check to a friend's son for his confirmation, and it was never cashed. Should I say anything to the parents?" Because they do. So tell your friends. Call them up and tell them how relieved you are that you're not the only one doing absent-minded things like that these days, and the proof that it isn't just you is an even better present than the generous (unsigned) check they gave your son.

My Word!

Arr, mateys. This Friday, September 19, be International Talk Like a Pirate Day. Sounds like an excellent theme for an after-work TGIF party to me! And be creative about it - how about a prize (a cask of grog, perhaps?) for whoever does the best translation of the boss's latest memo into piratespeak?

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Miss Conduct is Robin Abrahams, a Cambridge-based writer with a PhD in psychology.

QUESTIONS? Write to missconduct@globe.com or The Boston Globe Magazine/Miss Conduct, PO Box 55819, Boston, MA 02205-5819.