Response to "Loud kids"

Readers were uncharacteristically united in their answer to last Monday's question: if you live in an urban area, and keep your windows open, you pretty well have to expect noise during the day. It's true, too. I spent all day today editing a manuscript for my other job while listening to contractors reshingling the neighbor's roof to the accompaniment of Haitian talk radio. It's oddly soothing after a while.

Bluemoose decided to go against the general trend and suggest how you could approach the parents, if you really felt you must:

Someone who would prefer to be happy might consider speaking with the parents, but first try to come up with something concrete that you wish would happen. Would you prefer a lower volume overall, no screaming unless something is actually wrong, quiet hours, the parentally-recognized right to tell the kids to simmer down when the volume goes up too far? You're right that kids have the right to play outside in their backyard. You also have a right to a measure of peace in your own home. Try to figure out what would strike the balance between the two, and offer some suggestions to the parents. If you present this as an issue in which compromise can be successfully achieved, hopefully the parents will be receptive.

Good point! Always let people know what behaviors you do want, not just what you don't.

A few folks also homed in on the use of the word "screaming," and pointed out that kids yelling is one thing, and screaming is another. As Off the Grid Girl put it:

There's no need for kids to be "screaming at the top of their lungs" when they're outside playing, no matter what time of the day it is. Unless the parents have installed a Dueling Dragons rollercoaster in their backyard, this type of shrieking is completely unnecessary. Yes, kids can have fun and yell and shout (mid-day, of course), but I draw the line at screaming.

Case in point:
On a recent trip to Disney, there was one kid screaming in the pool. Being closest to him, I saw that he was screaming "Help! I can't swim!!" I got into the pool and dragged him to the side, where he proceeded to do that throaty, I've-swallowed-a-lot-of-water cough. Of course Mom was nowhere to be found.

When the other parents realized what was going on, they all said, "Oh, I just thought he was yelling for the fun of it." Uh-huh. This is exactly why we as parents (and neighbors) should discourage screaming during play (and I want to distinguish here between screaming and run-of-the-mill hullaballoo).

As a safety-minded sort, this made sense to me.