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Today's column

Posted by Robin Abrahams  October 7, 2012 11:30 AM

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... is online here. The first question:

My oldest sister has had many alcohol-related health problems, made worse by self-neglect. She was recently hospitalized, and family and friends seemed determined to hear me say it?s all because of her drinking, saying things like "This should be a wake-up call" or "Do you think it's because of her drinking" I am livid. I wish I had a good comeback.

... was a difficult one for me, and I wound up discussing it extensively with friends before writing a response. Initially, the logic-logic of the situation overwhelmed me ("How can you get mad at people for saying it's because of her drinking when it IS because of her drinking?") and I wasn't hearing the emotional logic running beneath it.

I'm currently re-watching "Star Trek: Deep Space 9" in the evenings, while I do my physical therapy exercises. All the "Star Trek" series--of which this is the unacknowledged best, in my opinion--emphasize that no matter how book-smart, how strong, how brave, how wise, how good-hearted we may be, each of us is incomplete on our own. We need our friends and colleagues to give us the perspective and skills that we lack. 

Thank you, friends, always. See you at Quark's. 


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About Miss Conduct
Welcome to Miss Conduct’s blog, a place where the popular Boston Globe Magazine columnist Robin Abrahams and her readers share etiquette tips, unravel social conundrums, and gossip about social behavior in pop culture and the news. Have a question of your own? Ask Robin using this form or by emailing her at missconduct@globe.com.
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Who is Miss Conduct?

Robin Abrahamswrites the weekly "Miss Conduct" column for The Boston Globe Magazine and is the author of Miss Conduct's Mind over Manners. Robin has a PhD in psychology from Boston University and also works as a research associate at Harvard Business School. Her column is informed by her experience as a theater publicist, organizational-change communications manager, editor, stand-up comedian, and professor of psychology and English. She lives in Cambridge with her husband Marc Abrahams, the founder of the Ig Nobel Prizes, and their socially challenged but charismatic dog, Milo.

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