Parking space etiquette
Q Yesterday, I was looking for a parking space at a mall when I spotted a car pulling out that was going the same direction I was. Across from me was another car driving in the opposite direction, also looking for a space. Since I was on the same side as the car that was leaving, I pulled into the space -- only to see the car opposite me going for the space as well. A battle started in which the other driver tried to scare me by getting very close to my car. She then got out of her car to chew me out, saying that she was there first and it was her space. I explained that I was driving in the same direction as the departing car, while she was driving in the wrong direction. Was I wrong to take the space?
G.V., San Francisco
A The burning question is: Who was waiting for the space first? Direction really doesn't play into the situation. The fact that it was easy for you to enter the space first doesn't relieve you of the obligation to note whether or not you were the first person in line for the space. If you were, fine. It sounds, however, like you weren't. If that's the case, then, yes, you were in the wrong.
In life, as in business, competing fairly and ethically is an essential building block of successful relationships. Imagine if you'd been on your way to an appointment with a business prospect, only to walk into the prospect's office and discover that she was the person in the other car!
Q I'm about to send a letter to a law firm requesting a job interview, but I can't determine my contact's gender based on his/her name. How should I address this person? "Dear Director of Human Resources" seems a little awkward.
R.S., Fort Worth
A I agree that sending a letter to "Director of Human Resources" wouldn't reflect well on you. The easiest solution is to call the company and ask the receptionist for the gender of your contact, explaining that you want to address your letter properly. Alternatively, you can go online and check the firm's website for clues, such as a page with write-ups and/or photos of personnel.
By the way, if you get to the interview stage and aren't sure how to pronounce your contact's name, again call ahead and ask the receptionist for the correct pronunciation. Pronouncing your interviewer's name correctly lets you start your interview smoothly, rather than with a mistake that you'll need to apologize for. It also shows you're a person who takes the time to prepare thoroughly. 