Street parking in Boston is usually reserved for people who are desperate or enjoy misery, so no one would blame you for balking at five different signs stacked on top of each other. But if you take a second, this actually isn’t that bad.
By the time you figure it out your time may have expired with the many instructions about parking in the North End pic.twitter.com/QZLhwbud2v— David L. Ryan (@GlobeDavidLRyan) June 5, 2014
Sure, it’s in the North End, an area that is notorious for bad parking. And yes, it will take you two minutes to make sure you’re not in line for a gouging parking ticket. But if you can find a spot pretty much anywhere in this town, reading the sign is worth your time. So let’s break this down.
The first (and probably most important) rule here is to not stop to the right of this sign during the day—you will be towed if it’s between 11 a.m. and 11 p.m. Got it? Good.
Now if it’s after 11 p.m. and before 8 a.m., you’re safe to park to the right of sign, but only if you’re a resident. Basically, make sure you’ve got a residency sticker for the North End before you park to the right of this sign overnight.
So your next question might be this: But what about parking to the right of this sign during the three hours between when resident parking ends at 8 a.m. and when absolutely no parking starts at 11 a.m.? Good news! Anyone can park there during that three hour window. Bad news! You can only park there for 15 minutes.
That pretty much sums up the parking situation to the right of the sign, but what about the equally coveted parking real estate to the left?
Well, things are slightly simpler over there, so target that area if you can. It’s straightforward resident parking between 6 p.m. and 8 a.m. (the standard overnight hours), and the rest of the time anyone is free to park there, but only for 30 minutes.
Oh, and about that “Except Sunday” thing. Basically those 15-minute and 30-minute limits are not in effect during their respective time windows. So if it’s between 8 a.m. and 11 a.m. on a Sunday, park to the right of the sign for as long as you want until 11 a.m. And if it’s between 8 a.m. and 6 p.m. on a Sunday, park to the left for as long as you want until 6 p.m.
See? Wasn’t that ea- wait, where did everybody go? What do you mean ‘they parked in a lot’? We were taking the time to explain how simple this is!
You know what? Forget it, these rules are insane anyway. Boston’s small, save yourself the headache and just walk.You can reach me at firstname.lastname@example.org. Follow me @dougsaffir