In response to pingo's comment:
Got an e-mail from a friend. Let's go out for dinner Sunday w/ friend and Alzheimer friend. Shot an e-mail back. Let's not go out, why don't you all come here, and I will make a simple dinner for us all.
Got e-mail back from Alzheimer's wife, "Thanks for your offer, but we cannot accept your invitation. XX is spilling food all over the table and the floor, and I cannot let one of my friends deal with that".
Returned e-mail, "I don't mind. A table cloth can go in the washer and a vac can take care of the floor - please do come".
Final e-mail, "Will meet you at such and such restaurant at such and such time."
I feel so sick in my heart. We had so much fun with these friends over 40 plus years. Now it has come to this. They can't even visit our home. What a burden to bear for our friend.
I honestly wouldn't mnd if my home would be a mess after they left, but I have to respect my friend. I feel heart sick.
Pingo, I think I would be embarassed more in a restaurant at the mess my partner would make than I would in a friends house who would be prepared. It would be upsetting any where...just my opinion....ss