Book Smart versus Street Smart

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from RogerTaylor. Show RogerTaylor's posts

    Book Smart versus Street Smart

    A couple of true stories to start....I helped a friend with a parking lot off of Rte 1 in Foxboro for Patriots home games. It was a wooded area (no pavement), dark, a couple of run down vacant buildings - home and garage and NO LIGHTS! The area held a 100+ cars @ $20 each. The lot next to me was well lit, paved and $20 per car.

    I stopped at a liquor store on a Wednesday night. As I entered I jokingly asked "where is everyone?" to which the 20 something responded "It's just me!". I went to a cooler looking for a particular brand of beer in bottles and couldn't find it. I asked the clerk if she had it. She replied "I'm not sure, let me take you in the cooler and check"

    I can't tell you how many 20 something girls in a car filled with girlfriends wanted to park in MY "un lit" wooded parking lot! (I sent them to the lot next to me that was lit & paved - I denied them parking) The clerk is willing to go into a cooler with a stranger! Is it just me or are these girls exhibiting questionable judgement? What ever happened to being "street smart" - smart, read with a wicked Boston accent - Why don't people acknowledge there surroundings - no lights, night time, dark alley? Heelllooooooo!

    I appreciate the trust given me, and nobody has to worry about me. But, I have a daughter and my concern is that someday she will be that girl pulling into an un lit wooded parking lot at night or ask a stranger into a cooler to check stock.

    So I ask, street smart or book smart - How important is it to be both? Undecided

    and begin.......
     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from Maldenlady. Show Maldenlady's posts

    Re: Book Smart versus Street Smart

    Gee -- the employer should have a policy on that!  I don't think she should have revealed that she was there alone, and certainly not have invited you back to the cooler!  Kinda makes me wonder what *she* was up to!

    It sounds very naive of her to take chances like that...*someone* should have the talk with her that should have happened long, long ago. 

    I am all for book learning.   I think there's nothing like a good, learned debate on important issues by people who have been reading about and following different issues.  I think "book smart" ability helps people understand and put into context the "street smart" stuff.  Personally, my "street smarts" are adequate, but not great.  It's sometimes hard for me to read non verbal subtext behind a physical gesture, for example. 

    Interestingly, if the same encounter is put in writing, I can often figure out what's *really* being said -- but maybe that's because I have a moment to think about it.  I think those people who have both traits are vey fortunate.  For me, I wish my "street smarts" were better.

    There's a trend in psychology that looks at the genetics behind this, which is really interesting.  Some people are just wired to be able to read people and situations, in the moment.
     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from there-and-backagain. Show there-and-backagain's posts

    Re: Book Smart versus Street Smart

    I find that a lot of young people are very trusting these days. They expect that everything is safe and warm.  Unfortunately, a lot of them will have some rude awakenings.

    Then again, maybe she was just really hot for you and was expecting a more emotional response in the cooler.

     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from cb156. Show cb156's posts

    Re: Book Smart versus Street Smart

    RT back again with another interesting question.
    My initial response would be that it's important to be both, although really it depends on how you define those terms.
    What I find really interesting here is whether this type of behavior is generally typical of people that age--especially if they did not grow up in the city--(as in, was I like that in my 20's?), or are we seeing a manifestation of a generational change?
    I have to wonder if this is more prevalent now, and if so, could it be related to the changing nature of social interaction--which today appears to be less face-to-face, and more electronic.  One is always safe staring at this screen and typing on this keyboard, or texting, or IM'ing, or whatever.  Perhaps they cannot really distinguish the difference between telling someone online that they are home alone and telling some stranger in a store that they are working alone?
    Or is it possibly due to parenting, where children are protected from anything and everything that could possibly be negative, or harmful or seem unfair?  They might be too trusting--after all, they never learned that anyone might have bad intentions or want to harm another person.

    I'm very interested to hear some perspectives on this one.
     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from cb156. Show cb156's posts

    Re: Book Smart versus Street Smart

    Of course, I could turn the tables on RT here:  did it occur to you that going into the cooler with this young girl was possibly dangerous (not that you indicated you went in the cooler, but did it occur to you)?  She could come out crying sexual assault, or she could have locked you in there and left you to freeze.
    You assumed that she wasn't very "street smart", but she could have been setting you up.  You might have placed yourself in as much danger as you think she was placing herself in. 
    If that never occurred to you, how "street smart" are you?
    Then again, I might just spend too much time watching "Criminal Minds".
    Tongue out
     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from lukeseri58. Show lukeseri58's posts

    Re: Book Smart versus Street Smart

    when i was a teenager, i use to thumb rides to the beach out on the highway on 128 -- people would tell me i was nuts and i probably was - but someone else told me once that most people picking you up thumbing are just going to give you a ride, but the ones who stop you when you are on the street and ask if you want a ride are the more dangerous types -- i think that as a whole we are way less trusting than we use to be or should be -- i think that the horrors we see everyday are no more prevelant than they were when i was young, we just didn't hear about them as much cause of the media today -- i consider myself extremely street smart but i am a 53 year old female who has seen a lot and done a lot -- i don't think i would tell rt i was at a store alone but i would park in the unlit parking lot - i assume lots of other folks are there parking and walking -- i walk to the train station every night in the dark when the fall and winter hit -- lots of people are walking about - i feel safe -- i think its a shame we have to be so scared and distrusting now -- and i think that (actually i know) that as parents we taught our kids to be afraid of strangers - so much so that when my husband bent done to pick a mitten up of a child in the carriage in front of him at the grocery store and handed to the child, the child screamed "stranger danger"
     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from RogerTaylor. Show RogerTaylor's posts

    Re: Book Smart versus Street Smart

    In Response to Re: Book Smart versus Street Smart:
    [QUOTE]Of course, I could turn the tables on RT here:  did it occur to you that going into the cooler with this young girl was possibly dangerous (not that you indicated you went in the cooler, but did it occur to you)?  She could come out crying sexual assault, or she could have locked you in there and left you to freeze. You assumed that she wasn't very "street smart", but she could have been setting you up.  You might have placed yourself in as much danger as you think she was placing herself in.  If that never occurred to you, how "street smart" are you? Then again, I might just spend too much time watching "Criminal Minds".
    Posted by cb156[/QUOTE]

    In response to your first post cb156. When I say "street smart" I refer to a person having the "where with all" and "common sense" to avoid - potential - danger for example: I wouldn't go surfing off Cape Cod during a hurricane because of the danger and the news bulletins telling me of the coastal water dangers/rip tides/high winds, etc.

    In response to your second post:

    OK cb156, I wouldn't mind being locked in a cooler full of cold beer..it would be a slow and filling death! LOL.  I had at least 80lbs over her and about a foot in height over her.  With no witnesses sexual assault would be hard to prove (blood, scratches,fluids, etc) but, in talking to her on more than one occasion she's just a young sane "trusting" kid...BTW...I'm old enough to be her Dad!

    P.S. I like your devil's advocate view!....good one
     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Book Smart versus Street Smart

    i think its a shame we have to be so scared and distrusting now -- and i think that (actually i know) that as parents we taught our kids to be afraid of strangers - so much so that when my husband bent done to pick a mitten up of a child in the carriage in front of him at the grocery store and handed to the child, the child screamed "stranger danger" 
    -----

    Fortunately, your husband is safe. But the child is correct to yell. That's what we teach children today, if they feel at all at risk - to use their lungs as their most powerful weapon (until they're old enough to carry mace and to have received their first degree black belt).

    Better the child be safe an adult slightly embarrassed than for the child to be unsafe.  How did you do this with your own? I have mine in a martial arts class, and local police give seminars at her school on self-defense.

    I don't think it's so much that we are teaching children to fear every stanger, than it is that we're teaching them to take care of themselves. I'm the same age as you. I think things are better for children today in terms of self-defense. We're giving them permission to temporarily-blind their attacks, just long enough for them to get a head start in running away. I wish we could do the same for infants and toddlers.

    As for Roger's liquor store girl - reckless behavior on her part, I say. When I worked retail (my most-hated of jobs, but that's for another thread), I was trained by my manager to never let customers know I was alone. (And usually, in a job in which money was exchanged, my places didn't leave employees alone.) This was probably a case of poor store management in Roger's case.         

    Now street vs book - we can be both, yes? But so many adults lack common sense, more so than children. Look at those grown-ups who went fishing down in Florida, and didn't head back in when the storm headed in. And even though the law said children don't need to be in life vests when the vessel is anchored, they should be. Fortunately, the adults were able to place her in a life vest even as they were going into the water.

    So, I don't feel it's an age/generational thing when it comes to being street smart - look what I posted about poor Evelyn Wagler in your Thank You thread. I don't blame her for her own suffering, but she was a trusting 20-something - and that was 35 years ago.                
     
  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from pinkkittie27. Show pinkkittie27's posts

    Re: Book Smart versus Street Smart

    maybe they were all carrying mace. I know I do.
     
  10. You have chosen to ignore posts from Jim-in-Littleton. Show Jim-in-Littleton's posts

    Re: Book Smart versus Street Smart

    In Response to Re: Book Smart versus Street Smart:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Book Smart versus Street Smart :   In response to your second post: OK cb156, I wouldn't mind being locked in a cooler full of cold beer..it would be a slow and filling death! LOL.  I had at least 80lbs over her and about a foot in height over her.  With no witnesses sexual assault would be hard to prove (blood, scratches,fluids, etc) but, in talking to her on more than one occasion she's just a young sane "trusting" kid...BTW...I'm old enough to be her Dad! P.S. I like your devil's advocate view!....good one
    Posted by RogerTaylor[/QUOTE]

    I don't see being able to prove sexual assult as the yardstick to use here. If she calls the cops and says you assulted her, your reputation is shot right there.  While the DA might not be able to come up with any evidence of proof, your mugshot is still going to show up in every newspaper and on every evening newscast within days.  Every person you know will know of it and you'd forever be "that guy that got away with attacking an innocent young girl".

    But to your original question:  I think it's very hard to determine exactly how "street smart" someone is without having the benefit of a long background with them.  We tend to judge the actions of others through the filters of our own experience and judgement without knowing what the other person's experiences have been. Maybe she is fully prepared to deal with an attacker?

    You said yourself that you've talked to her on more than one occassion.  Maybe she's just street smart enough to have sized you up and and judged you to not be a threat while you are the "slow" one here that hasn't sized her up adequately yet?
     
  11. You have chosen to ignore posts from cb156. Show cb156's posts

    Re: Book Smart versus Street Smart

    J-I-L wrote:
    You said yourself that you've talked to her on more than one occassion.  Maybe she's just street smart enough to have sized you up and and judged you to not be a threat while you are the "slow" one here that hasn't sized her up adequately yet?
    -----------------------------------
    Good point, although it is not clear from RT whether those conversations might have occurred before or after the incident in question.
    And I completely agree with the damage that would be caused simply by any accusation of wrong-doing.
    I also agree that it's difficult to judge based on limited contact.  In the example with the girls parking--I wouldn't necessarily like the idea of parking in an unlit area, but it was apparently a number of girls travelling together--not a single girl out by herself.  They were at least following the oft-stated rule "don't travel alone".

    And just as another sort-of-devil's advocate question here:  It wasn't very smart of that girl to tell you she was alone in the store.  But how smart was it of the manager or owner to have her there by herself in the first place?  She shouldn't have announced it, but at the same time, she never should have been put in that position.
     

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