Can a 'friends with benefits' situation ever be successful?

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from JeepersCripes. Show JeepersCripes's posts

    Re: Can a 'friends with benefits' situation ever be successful?

    RT, I didnt assume anything. How was he not in agreement? And the outcome is what it is. We are still friends, we still talk. I am sorry, but your comment doesnt  make any sense to me. I would get that maybe I would "assume" if we were not still friends, but we are.

    Malden- you hit it on the head. There was an understanding that if I met someone or he met someone that we wanted to persue, then the FWB stopped. It happened a couple times on my end and once on his. No hurt feelings at all. It ended because I met my current bf. And he has subsquently met someone as well. It was a great situation for the both of us at the time.
     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from MrCorvin. Show MrCorvin's posts

    Re: Can a 'friends with benefits' situation ever be successful?

    I had 1 of these. We had a couple of dates, and determined that it wouldn't work out between us for a relationship (different thoughts on what we wanted to do, etc etc). It was nice to hang out and talk though.

    Oddly enough, as soon as we decided not to actually date, the benefits came in. It was a good month, month and a half, she found a guy she dug, and I wished her adios.

     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from RogerTaylor. Show RogerTaylor's posts

    Re: Can a 'friends with benefits' situation ever be successful?

    In Response to Re: Can a 'friends with benefits' situation ever be successful?:
    [QUOTE]RT, I didnt assume anything. How was he not in agreement? And the outcome is what it is. We are still friends, we still talk. I am sorry, but your comment doesnt  make any sense to me. I would get that maybe I would "assume" if we were not still friends, but we are. Malden- you hit it on the head. There was an understanding that if I met someone or he met someone that we wanted to persue, then the FWB stopped. It happened a couple times on my end and once on his. No hurt feelings at all. It ended because I met my current bf. And he has subsquently met someone as well. It was a great situation for the both of us at the time.
    Posted by Jeepers-Cripes[/QUOTE]

    So, when you tell him about your date you know it doesn't bother him in any way? You know when you call him that he's not excited to hear your voice and may be hoping to rekindle your past? You know his feeling's aren't hurt because you and he have the "exact" same feelings? My point in my previous post was that what you "think" about your FWB situation may not be what he thinks...sorry, if you disagree
     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from JeepersCripes. Show JeepersCripes's posts

    Re: Can a 'friends with benefits' situation ever be successful?

    Wait, are you my past FWB RT?

    But yes, I disagree. #1. I dont talk about my dates with him. Nor does he discuss his dates with me. Have we discussed people we are/were dating? Yes, but more in a general way, not specific by any means. Again, established boundaries. #2. Yes, we did/do have the same exact feelings because we have discussed that and have shared a chuckle or two about it. FWB is exactly that. Friends. We never held hands or cuddled or did anything "relationshipy". It was sex. and a few Sox games, night out at a pub, too many margharitas, etc... #3. I have known him for a very long time (since 8th grade actually) and trust me, he didnt/doesnt like be beyond FWB status. You can tell when someone starts to develope more feelings, and I never did for him, nor him for me. Plus we have mutual friends in common that have pretty much support everything I have said. He is very happy in his new relationship and I am as well. If we had parted ways and never talked again, then yes, I could see where you are coming from. But we still talk. If he had feelings for me, he would have attempted to make it more, right? Or I would have. But we never did because we knew exactly what it was.
     
    so no, I dont "think" I know, I "know" I know. If you want his number to confirm this, I can give it to you?  ;)
     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from RogerTaylor. Show RogerTaylor's posts

    Re: Can a 'friends with benefits' situation ever be successful?

    In Response to Re: Can a 'friends with benefits' situation ever be successful?:
    [QUOTE]Wait, are you my past FWB RT? But yes, I disagree. #1. I dont talk about my dates with him. Nor does he discuss his dates with me. Have we discussed people we are/were dating? Yes, but more in a general way, not specific by any means. Again, established boundaries. #2. Yes, we did/do have the same exact feelings because we have discussed that and have shared a chuckle or two about it. FWB is exactly that. Friends. We never held hands or cuddled or did anything "relationshipy". It was sex. and a few Sox games, night out at a pub, too many margharitas, etc... #3. I have known him for a very long time (since 8th grade actually) and trust me, he didnt/doesnt like be beyond FWB status. You can tell when someone starts to develope more feelings, and I never did for him, nor him for me. Plus we have mutual friends in common that have pretty much support everything I have said. He is very happy in his new relationship and I am as well. If we had parted ways and never talked again, then yes, I could see where you are coming from. But we still talk. If he had feelings for me, he would have attempted to make it more, right? Or I would have. But we never did because we knew exactly what it was.   so no, I dont "think" I know, I "know" I know. If you want his number to confirm this, I can give it to you?  ;)
    Posted by Jeepers-Cripes[/QUOTE]

    Wow! I guess the "Vulcan mind meld" DOES work! Quick what's your FWB thinking right now? What will he choose for breakfast 3 days from now?
     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from JEnvie. Show JEnvie's posts

    Re: Can a 'friends with benefits' situation ever be successful?

    i am not getting into the rights and wrongs of anyones lifestyle or judgments, that's not my call (cause i would be living in a glass house!), however; i have had about 7 fwb situations and each one was successful for several of the same and some different reasons
    so, my answer to the question would be yes
     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from calicokitty. Show calicokitty's posts

    Re: Can a 'friends with benefits' situation ever be successful?

    Sometimes I wish I could handle a realtionship like this but for me I don't think it could ever work. Sex is more than just sex for me.
     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from JeepersCripes. Show JeepersCripes's posts

    Re: Can a 'friends with benefits' situation ever be successful?

    He isnt thinking right now, hes asleep. And he doesnt really eat breakfast, but if he does its usualy eggs over easy with hash and ham ;)

    But I appreciate your thinking that I am that awesome that he would actually "like" me more than FWBs.
     
  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from JaneRI. Show JaneRI's posts

    Re: Can a 'friends with benefits' situation ever be successful?

    In Response to Re: Can a 'friends with benefits' situation ever be successful?:
    [QUOTE]Sometimes I wish I could handle a realtionship like this but for me I don't think it could ever work. Sex is more than just sex for me.
    Posted by calicokitty[/QUOTE]

    Good for you for being self-aware enough to know this.  I've had several friends who chose to ignore this about themselves, did it anyway, and ended up crushed.  I, being on the outside looking in, could see they liked the guys in question and were using it as a pathway to a relationship.  

    I on the other hand have done it several times and am fine w/it.  On one occasion I began something like this, realized pretty quickly I was falling for the guy - knew he didn't want anything more substantial w/me - so I ended it.
     
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