Personal Poll

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from laryan. Show laryan's posts

    Personal Poll

    i think it depends on the couple, but every day seems excessive to me. seems your DH is just being a guy...
     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from chrispatriotsox. Show chrispatriotsox's posts

    Re: Personal Poll

    How often are you and your SO intimate? He says we should be every day, but sometimes, I just don't want to do anything. So I pose the question to everyone....how often do your relationships require it? Is my DH right or is he just being a guy and trying to make me feel guilty?
    Posted by Ampy


    well there could be a lot of reasons for this

    my thoughts are

    1 he is a man who finds you very attractive and is turned on by you in a very intimate way. ie the way your hair smells after a shower, they way you flip your hair, the way you crinkle your nose when you laugh
    2 he needs sex as a  constant reassurance that you love and care for him then hes very insecure
    3 if he tries to make you feel guilty for not wanting to have sex thats a man who is very controlling and manipulative thats not intimatmacy

    those are a few of my thoughts there is no real right answer for how often thats a number that is set by both of you not one of you.

    To me there is no bigger turn on then a women who is turned on by me THATS HOT if i have to resort to guilt or manipultion; to me thats jerk off sex!! shes just lay'n there waiting for me to finish and how fun can that be.

    and i can't spell to save my life lol
     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from BigWillie2. Show BigWillie2's posts

    Re: Personal Poll

    There is no 'should' here.  It's when you both want to.  And how often you want to depends on your age, how long you've been together,  and all sorts of other variables.   After you've been together a long time - and I get the impression the two of you have not - then it's inevitable that you'll sometimes have sex even though one of you isn't particularly in the mood.  As long as that's the exception, not the rule, it shouldn't be a problem.  And sometimes you'll discover that you might not have started in the mood, only to change your mind! 

    Right now though, it sounds like you two have a problem you need to confront head on. If you're young and the relationship is new then you'll find your balance point soon enough.
     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: Personal Poll

    How often are you and your SO intimate? He says we should be every day, but sometimes, I just don't want to do anything. So I pose the question to everyone....how often do your relationships require it? Is my DH right or is he just being a guy and trying to make me feel guilty?
    Posted by Ampy


    You could go back and add a real poll - it's a cool feature.  Edit your original post, and choose "make this a poll."  It lets you design the poll, and you choose as many answer choices as you want.  It gets added to the bottom of what you've already written.

    P.S.  And, yes, it's different for every couple and different for the same couple at different times in their relationship. So many factors impact sexual desire that we can't possibly say what is "right" for you and your SO.  You could get couples counseling and work it out that way, or talk about it openly and completely honestly with your SO by yourselves if you are both able to do that unguided.
     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from ALF72. Show ALF72's posts

    Re: Personal Poll

    Big Willie hit this one spot on. It depends.  Sure, some days, every day works well. Other times, we can go a week to 10 days.  It depends alot on outside forces. 

    If one person is never in the mood, then yeah, you've got an issue that needs to be resolved.  However, I've found that even if you aren't necessarily in the mood, once you get going, you get in the mood.  Just a suggestion. 

     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from 7x4. Show 7x4's posts

    Re: Personal Poll

    Is he going after the bad hole on a daily basis. THat could be a problem.
     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from scauma82. Show scauma82's posts

    Re: Personal Poll

    every day sounds about right.
     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from Candykisses. Show Candykisses's posts

    Re: Personal Poll

    I agree with the husband =)
     
  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from calmdown. Show calmdown's posts

    Re: Personal Poll

    Scauma, is that you bro?
     
  10. You have chosen to ignore posts from calmdown. Show calmdown's posts

    Re: Personal Poll

    I wouldn't mind if Aries took a poll.
     
  11. You have chosen to ignore posts from lukeseri58. Show lukeseri58's posts

    Re: Personal Poll

    cps - this statement is so true -- of course in my case its a man -- To me there is no bigger turn on then a women who is turned on by me THATS HOT
    and if i feel that desire from him - every day is great - but it does depend on the couple
     
  12. You have chosen to ignore posts from 2ada63d622e89774a9fdcbc90527ab8e. Show 2ada63d622e89774a9fdcbc90527ab8e's posts

    Re: Personal Poll

    What's right is what you work out between the two of you.

    I think there are some polls out there with averages (and they are averages, not the numbers for each couple) and it's something like most days a week for newlyweds and the first few years of marriage, dropping off to two or three times a week for many years (and maybe less for people when they have very young children), and dropping off to once a week to ten days for much older people (yes, they have sex, too.)
     
  13. You have chosen to ignore posts from plasko. Show plasko's posts

    Re: Personal Poll

    There are many factors involved:
    1- Age. Younger people are super-horny and need more sex. People in 30s onwards are happy with less.
    2- Stage of relationship. At the start of any relationship (maybe first 2 years) its all about pulling off the clothes and doing the deed. As relationships progress then these initial hormones calm down. Relationship deepens. 
    3- Biology. Different people are wired differently. Some people are literally more hormonal than others, resulting in an insatiable hunger for sex. 
    4- Psychology. Some people equate physical acts of love such as sex with real love. Sex then becomes a crutch as a way to be told that you are loved. 

    As the saying goes, "different strokes for different folks". 
    Clearly you are not comfortable with everyday though which is fine. Get him some porn-films and you can then let him relieve himself on days you need a rest. There is nothing wrong with porn when used correctly :)

     
  14. You have chosen to ignore posts from plasko. Show plasko's posts

    Re: Personal Poll

    ......Although if you are handing it out everynight like dishing up a meal then it really takes away the seduction and mystique. There is no "hunt" or gameplay if you know you are getting it on tap. You have to say no sometimes to be wanted all the more. The art of seduction is all about the teasing aspect. 
    Don't make it a routine. Daily is a routine.
    Change locations and times to keep it fresh. But learn how to say "but darling, you don't deserve me all the time". Make him work for it. 
    He will love you all the more if you are enticing and he will never know when it will happen. Keep him guessing. 
    Thats why a lady in a long skirt with a long slit that occasionally flashes flesh is much more enticing than one with a miniskirt showing it all off. Its all about what they can imagine and long for. 

    Just a thought.
     
  15. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Personal Poll

    Twice a day or more!
     
  16. You have chosen to ignore posts from RogerTaylor. Show RogerTaylor's posts

    Re: Personal Poll

    "If you don't feed your dog, it will start sniffing through the neighbors trash!"

    If you and your partner don't have the same sex drive, talk!  A guy "may" use your lack of intimacy as an excuse to look elsewhere for a playmate - the inverse of this can be true too! it's NOT just a guy thing.
     
  17. You have chosen to ignore posts from RogerTaylor. Show RogerTaylor's posts

    Re: Personal Poll

    In Response to Re: Personal Poll:
    well there could be a lot of reasons for this my thoughts are 1 he is a man who finds you very attractive and is turned on by you in a very intimate way. ie the way your hair smells after a shower, they way you flip your hair, the way you crinkle your nose when you laugh 2 he needs sex as a  constant reassurance that you love and care for him then hes very insecure 3 if he tries to make you feel guilty for not wanting to have sex thats a man who is very controlling and manipulative thats not intimatmacy those are a few of my thoughts there is no real right answer for how often thats a number that is set by both of you not one of you. To me there is no bigger turn on then a women who is turned on by me THATS HOT if i have to resort to guilt or manipultion; to me thats jerk off sex!! shes just lay'n there waiting for me to finish and how fun can that be. and i can't spell to save my life lol
    Posted by chrispatriotsox



    Great post!
     
  18. You have chosen to ignore posts from TamaraLee. Show TamaraLee's posts

    Re: Personal Poll

    It depends with us.  When we first were together we could have sex mutiple times a day.  Now it averages about 4x a week...sometimes more, sometimes less.   
     
  19. You have chosen to ignore posts from JeepersCripes. Show JeepersCripes's posts

    Re: Personal Poll

    Ok any guy that has to guilt a woman into sex is a tool, in my book. It should be a mutual thing. And yes, there have been times when I wasnt in the mood, but still "performed" and I am sure vice-versa.
    Every couple is different, I would say though it should be at least a couple times a week. When you start getting to the once a month time frame, you are in trouble.

    Keep in mind though, that everyone has different cycles, you can go through ruts where you are just not in the mood, ie stress. So that should be taken into consideration too.
     
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