Re: So Confused, So Hurt
posted at 3/8/2010 7:23 PM EST
In Response to Re: So Confused, So Hurt
Wow, that was hard to read. Mostly because of the formatting, how 'bout some paragraph breaks next time? Normally I'd say that 31/22 is too much of an age gap. It's only 9 years, but it's that particular stage it doesn't seem like it's a good match. But on the other hand you sound very young yourself, so who knows. In any case you have not described a healthy, mature relationship. You both sound very immature. You had a one year relationship. This girl - and sorry but you did not describe a woman - walked out on the last one. Then she walked out on you. Sounds like a pattern. I'm sure it hurts but why would you want to salvage this? You just need time to get over it, nothing you do or say, or anything anyone else can say, will help.
Posted by BigWillie2
Big Willie, you make a ton of good points here. The author does sound really young and immature. Maybe not in a crazy, go out boozing every night while meatheading it up at the gym on saturdays at four way.. but certainly in a very inexperienced in the world way.
I would suggest understanding the states of mind you are both in. The place in your lives you are in. She is still a kid, you're getting older. If I think back to who I was at 22 and who I am now at 29, HUGE difference. All those that I hurt at 22, I wish I could take back and treat right today. But it doesn't work that way. Sounds like you were her fall back plan, sounds like maybe she found another. Seems to me she's a girl in high demand with even higher demands. You won't compete with that if you have a cry baby attitude.
Although your feelings are very real to you, in the grand scheme of things, you'll get over it. and sooner than you think. Of course you could always hold on the fact that she's the one that got away, but that's only asking for trouble. Understand you guys aren't right for each other. Time heals. And you were only together a year. I assume you don't own a house together, cars, children, etc. so you have even more potentional of moving on faster.
Move on from her and find a woman. Men think all 30 year old women want marriage and babies, that isn't really the truth. Open your heart and find someone who is right for you. Because P.S. there is a such thing as a healthy relationship where you don't fight ALL THE TIME.