Quick question about BM dresses...
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Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/5/2011 11:58 PM EST
- kinga9
- Posts: 180
- First: 7/1/2008
- Last: 12/6/2012
I'm having my BMs pick their own dresses for the wedding. The only thing I ask is that they be blue. Any shade, any length, any shape, any anything. I decided against the tradition route of same dress or different dress/same designer thing because I wanted everyone to be truly comfortable and unique, and maybe use the dress again. Has anyone else done this before for their BM dresses and it backfired somehow? -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/6/2011 12:56 AM EST
- trex509
- Posts: 1025
- First: 7/1/2009
- Last: 8/28/2011
I think that sounds really nice! I'm sure it will work out great.
For my BMs, I tried to get their input to help pick dresses, but they were so sweet that they were too shy to give me their actual opinion. They kept saying they would wear a paper bag if I asked them to! So after many frustrating trips, I ended up falling in love with a dress and they all agreed to it. So I tried, but it was too hard! -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/6/2011 10:54 AM EST
- JEnvie
- Posts: 200
- First: 10/13/2008
- Last: 2/2/2012
funny you should ask, at a recent wedding, the bridesmaids all wore black and white polka dot dresses and red shoes of their choosing and i was sooo impressed with how well they all looked, these girls were a multitude of shapes and sizes, each one looked great in the dress they picked, and they looked great together, but it brought to mind, and discussion about a wedding my friend was in, her s-i-l asked that everyone wear a blue dress, these blues ranged in color from light to midnight, with electric and tourquise (spelling?) thrown in, and they ranged in materials from suede to chiffon, it quite frankly looked horrendous, and a girl at the polka dot wedding agreed, saying that blue was the most undefined color to work with, too general, and she was an art major.... -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/6/2011 11:12 AM EST
- kinga9
- Posts: 180
- First: 7/1/2008
- Last: 12/6/2012
My mental picture of that wedding party is hilarious...suede dress? That doesn't sound very comfortable! Thinking about my BMs, I can't picture any of them picking out an electric blue dress, but who knows, right? I know the MOH is wearing navy, so maybe the rest of the girls will take thier cue from her and go from there. -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/6/2011 11:16 AM EST
- DWR1
- Posts: 85
- First: 11/8/2009
- Last: 4/24/2011
Leaving hope to the wind
What ever happens remember when they all show up dont be disapointed if they are not what you dreamed of for your pictures
Good Luck -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/6/2011 11:24 AM EST
- trex509
- Posts: 1025
- First: 7/1/2009
- Last: 8/28/2011
Huh, JEnvie makes a good point about the various shades of blue available and how they might not coordinate well together. maybe you want to pick a few shades from the paint pallettes at Home Depot and give them to them as samples of colors you like. That way you don't end up with too many different shades of blue. -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/6/2011 11:59 AM EST
- kinga9
- Posts: 180
- First: 7/1/2008
- Last: 12/6/2012
Great idea...thank you!
In Response to Re: Quick question about BM dresses...:Huh, JEnvie makes a good point about the various shades of blue available and how they might not coordinate well together. maybe you want to pick a few shades from the paint pallettes at Home Depot and give them to them as samples of colors you like. That way you don't end up with too many different shades of blue.
Posted by trex509 -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/6/2011 9:42 PM EST
- jasmine09
- Posts: 784
- First: 5/25/2008
- Last: 7/8/2011
Think about your ladies' preferences and talk to them before committing to this. A couple of my bridesmaids had been in weddings that took this "choose your own" approach and told me they found it majorly stressful. They were worried about finding the right thing, and matching what the bride wanted, etc. So they were pleased to have me choose the dress. (It probably helped that I chose a simple cocktail length, silk, navy A-line dress for under $100. =wear again potential, and not too expensive. Plus no one needed alterations. It can be done!) -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/7/2011 12:21 AM EST
- trex509
- Posts: 1025
- First: 7/1/2009
- Last: 8/28/2011
Kinga: glad to help! Good luck!
Jasmine: yeah, that's basically what happened to me! It was just easier for everyone for me to pick (with their okay of course!). I ended up picking a very bridesmaidy dress, but at least it was only $109! And one my friends actually ended up wearing it to a wedding after mine! That made me so happy!! :) -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/7/2011 8:14 AM EST
- kinga9
- Posts: 180
- First: 7/1/2008
- Last: 12/6/2012
Jasmine, I never thought about that. I think you're right, i'll just ask them and see what they want to do. Thank you! -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/7/2011 8:34 AM EST
- kathanne
- Posts: 18
- First: 2/2/2010
- Last: 2/10/2011
I got my bm dresses from Davids Bridal. I chose a color and fabric and then there were several different styles for them to chose from. It was nice becuase all of them got to chose a dress that they liked and felt flattered them. Everyone looked great and felt comfortable. And the dresses were less than $100.
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Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/7/2011 8:35 AM EST
- venforknot
- Posts: 101
- First: 12/20/2010
- Last: 8/17/2011
I would also suggest you think about picking material. My friend did this for her wedding. The girls could wear any shade of red but the dresses had to be satin. It gave some uniformity and also let the ladies pick their style. I've seen it done as JEnvie's sil did and the mix of materials was so distracting and the pictures just didn't look right. Some girls' dresses shimmered in the pics and some were flat and it really drew your eye away from what the photographer was trying to achieve with the photos. I also like the idea of a range of colors so you know what you're getting. My sister picked a dress that came in 3 different necklines. She picked the color and the dresses were all the same length, but we all got to choose which neckline we were most comfortable with. It was great! I am picking my dress for my ladies though, none of them had the time to go dress hunting and they all wanted to be in the same thing anyway! -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/7/2011 8:41 AM EST
- kargiver
- Posts: 21719
- First: 10/17/2005
- Last: 5/25/2013
I agree with the others who have said that when you imagine the different shades your brain automatically chooses colors that go. But, true randomness isn't like that, and you could end up with a mess of uncoordinated colors like this. If having bms dressed in these colors wouldn't bother you, I guess you're more game to this method than I would be!
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Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/7/2011 9:04 AM EST
- Rirlo01
- Posts: 237
- First: 1/3/2010
- Last: 7/1/2011
I picked the color and length (long for November) and told the ladies to go at it through David's Bridal. There were different fabrics, and I didn't care at all. (One dress had multiple fabrics!) In fact, I loved the variety and the fact that each woman seemed so comfortable. I can see how some groups might prefer more direction, but my party seemed to love the idea, and they looked great.
Good luck! -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/7/2011 9:57 AM EST
- allreadymarried
- Posts: 540
- First: 9/6/2012
- Last: 5/24/2013
As it has been pointed out I worry about the color and this may not look great in person or pictures.
BUT..... if this is not a priority to you than go for it 100%.
I was in a wedding where we had dresses made with the same material but we all got to pick how we wanted the dress to look. Yes, we all matched in color (the material was bought from the same bolt) but I was not 100% crazy that we all looked different. But that is my opinion.
What is most important is you are happy. -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/7/2011 10:02 AM EST
- pinkkittie27
- Posts: 3467
- First: 7/5/2009
- Last: 1/24/2013
I chose a shade of blue and let my BMs choose their own dresses. They did a fabulous job, and two of them even ended up getting the same dress totally by coincidence! My SIL's dress was a different material, but because it was the same color it still looked great.
I have also seen pictures of BMs with green dresses, but different shades. I think it looked really nice:
I guess it depends how coordinated you want your party to look. If you want super coordinated, pick a particular color. Paint swatches work best as guides because your BMs can bringt hem shopping.
If not, let them choose their own. -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/7/2011 10:09 AM EST
- kinga9
- Posts: 180
- First: 7/1/2008
- Last: 12/6/2012
I can definitely see all the pros and cons to this, and I *think* I'm willing to take a chance, secretly hoping no one turns up wearing neon pleather!!! I guess my next question would be how I would tie it all together in terms of having them stand out as bridemaids in a subtle way. Some thoughts that came to mind were having them all wear a flower in their hair (unless they strongly object) or having some other "piece" to them that coordinated them just a little bit.
Any suggestions? I'm definitely not the creative type when it comes to this stuff! -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/7/2011 10:17 AM EST
- kargiver
- Posts: 21719
- First: 10/17/2005
- Last: 5/25/2013
You could give them all wrist corsages - that way it would go with every dress.
I personally think that green montage is a monstrosity for bridesmaids, an example of what can go wrong. They look like a random bunch of girls, not bridesmaids to me.
I've seen photos of pink's party, and I did like that, though. She picked the line (color and material) and let the girls pick styles that flattered them. I thought that was a pretty and coordinated way to have the bridesmaids comfortable and happy with their dresses and not look totally matchy-matchy. -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/7/2011 11:10 AM EST
- pinkkittie27
- Posts: 3467
- First: 7/5/2009
- Last: 1/24/2013
In Response to Re: Quick question about BM dresses...:You could give them all wrist corsages - that way it would go with every dress. I personally think that green montage is a monstrosity for bridesmaids, an example of what can go wrong. They look like a random bunch of girls, not bridesmaids to me. I've seen photos of pink's party, and I did like that, though. She picked the line (color and material) and let the girls pick styles that flattered them. I thought that was a pretty and coordinated way to have the bridesmaids comfortable and happy with their dresses and not look totally matchy-matchy.
Posted by kargiver
I didn't pick the material, just the color and I told them it should be semi-formal to formal. Three went for shiny satin mateial, one went for a chiffon-type matte material, they all looked good.
I did get them matching necklaces as a gift, and I think their bouquets helped them stand out as bridesmaids.
Plus, since they all chose to wear full-length formal dresses, they stood out because their dresses were more formal than most of the guests.
I do think you want the formality of the dresses to match. You don't want one BM in a cotton sundress and another in ball gown. So give them some guidelines as far as whether you want evening formal, day formal, semi-formal, cocktail attire, garden party, or summer cook out. -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/7/2011 11:48 AM EST
- kargiver
- Posts: 21719
- First: 10/17/2005
- Last: 5/25/2013
Oh, sorry, I thought it was the same material. Whatever it was, it looked awesome! -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/7/2011 11:58 AM EST
- trex509
- Posts: 1025
- First: 7/1/2009
- Last: 8/28/2011
In Response to Re: Quick question about BM dresses...:I can definitely see all the pros and cons to this, and I *think* I'm willing to take a chance, secretly hoping no one turns up wearing neon pleather!!! I guess my next question would be how I would tie it all together in terms of having them stand out as bridemaids in a subtle way. Some thoughts that came to mind were having them all wear a flower in their hair (unless they strongly object) or having some other "piece" to them that coordinated them just a little bit. Any suggestions? I'm definitely not the creative type when it comes to this stuff!
Posted by kinga9
I think having them all have matching bouquets would work for tying them together. The hair flower is a good idea too, although I'd stick with something subtle. The best thing is to talk it through with your girls if you can. They might come up with some ideas on their own that they all like and I know with my friends, they enjoyed being part of the process. (but that might depend on them, mine were super into it!) -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/7/2011 12:13 PM EST
- cosmogirl
- Posts: 4240
- First: 12/7/2006
- Last: 4/24/2013
kinga, I don't think you have to do anything to "designate" them as bridesmaids. It will be obvious as they come down the aisle, and after the ceremony, how nice that they WON'T be sticking out in the crowd!
(After the ceremony is over, the bridesmaids' jobs are "done" and they don't really do anything at the reception, so no need to single them out.)
I agree that the pictures of the "green dress bridesmaids" are pretty random-looking, but I 100% prefer it over the matchy-matchy look. -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/7/2011 1:15 PM EST
- deniece881
- Posts: 28
- First: 3/10/2009
- Last: 3/28/2011
Kinga, I also told my bridesmaids to pick a blue kneeish length dress and it worked out fine. Cosmo's right, the walking down the aisle and standing up front part pretty much designated them as bridesmaids. :-) They had matching boquets too, but they were set aside at the reception. I have to say, it worked out well. I sent them all swatch cards to help them with color (I was afraid of electric blue too). I've also heard of people using paint chip cards to build a palette to help give direction.
The first had no problem and went right out and bought a dress, the second and I went shopping when we were together one weekend, and I had one panicked email from the third after she went to a bridal shop. A few links to dresses I thought she would like calmed her down and she picked out a cute one (on sale even) that fit her personality perfectly.
I can't imagine trying to reconcile the three tastes and budgets into one dress. And they looked lovely. -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/7/2011 1:20 PM EST
- WhirledPeasPlease
- Posts: 1320
- First: 12/11/2008
- Last: 5/24/2013
I only had a MOH and a BM and when we went to David's Bridal, I told them to pick whatever dresses they wanted as long as they came in a certain brown color. It was super easy for me because they were picking the dresses, and they ended up with the same dress anyway.
I felt weird about picking a dress for them and making them wear it. That said, I'm in my SIL's wedding this summer and she chose one dress for her 7 BMs, which is totally fine with me. It's her wedding, and I'll wear a tutu if she really wants me to. -
Re: Quick question about BM dresses...
posted at 2/7/2011 3:34 PM EST
- kinga9
- Posts: 180
- First: 7/1/2008
- Last: 12/6/2012
Yeah, I guess the whole walking down the aisle carrying a big bundle of white hydrangeas kind of says it all! I'm definitely going to go with the paint chip card idea to get them started. Thank you everyone for your input!