dress code on reception card?

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from octbride09. Show octbride09's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    Okay then. How exactly am I going to spread this..."word of mouth"? Wouldn't emails be the same exact thing as putting it in writing on an invitation?

    I do have a website, but I don't think people check it all the time.

    how would you suggest getting the word out?

     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from ALF72. Show ALF72's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    Tell your mother, sisters, BMs. etc - basically anyone who is involved in the wedding - to mention it whenever anyone mentions the wedding to them.  I realize people may not discuss your wedding on a regular basis, but there has to be some kind of family get together or shower between now and then when people can casually mention the attire issue.  Good luck.
     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from pinkkittie27. Show pinkkittie27's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    If Emily Post says it's okay, then it's NOT a faux pas to me. To complain about that is like complaining about an insert listing directions. A little guidance shouldn't be taken as a slight. It's not like it says "no shirt no shoes no service."
     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from lucy7368. Show lucy7368's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    Put it in your Facebook status!!!  Cool

    I actually think there's plenty of time to add it to your website.  Sure, people won't be looking for daily updates, but the majority of your guests will likely be there sometime between now and October.
     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from cosmogirl. Show cosmogirl's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    The bottom line is, a day wedding and before-six reception don't call for formalwear, but I'm sure everyone will dress nicely.  If you are that worried, you could put "suits and ties for the guys, dresses for the ladies" on your website and then let it go.  It will be fine, I promise! 
     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    In Response to Re: dress code on reception card?:
    If Emily Post says it's okay, then it's NOT a faux pas to me. To complain about that is like complaining about an insert listing directions. A little guidance shouldn't be taken as a slight. It's not like it says "no shirt no shoes no service."
    Posted by pinkkittie27


    I know, it's just information on the "additional information" insert.  I just don't get the controversy on this one.
     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from Peonie. Show Peonie's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    I don't know why it's such a big deal what people wear to a wedding? Is it really going to make or break the day? No one is going to show up wearing jeans and a t-shirt....
     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from whatawagSBNy. Show whatawagSBNy's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    You think not?
     
  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    In Response to Re: dress code on reception card?:
    I don't know why it's such a big deal what people wear to a wedding? Is it really going to make or break the day? No one is going to show up wearing jeans and a t-shirt....
    Posted by Peonie


    It's the same for any party.  Some are a lot more formal than others, and if everyone knows the level of formality the whole event ends up having the desired atmosphere.  But, yes, it contributes, not makes or breaks.  It's a central part of the formality of the event, though.  I mean, my brother's wedding was black tie.  I wore a full length evening dress that I'd never have worn otherwise.
     
  10. You have chosen to ignore posts from Scorpio75. Show Scorpio75's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    In Response to Re: dress code on reception card?:
    I don't know why it's such a big deal what people wear to a wedding? Is it really going to make or break the day? No one is going to show up wearing jeans and a t-shirt....
    Posted by Peonie

    I went to my DH's cousin wedding, it was during the day.  There was an Aunt and Uncle that RSVP'ed no (seriously) and then showed up the day of in shorts, tshirts, and boat shoes, no socks.  It happens, there are idiots out there and I am not even sure if the bride and groom noticed, others did and talked including the groom's father (the Aunt's brother) but it did not seem to have an impact on the rest of the wedding party.

    Heck there was even a lady that was extremely pregnant at the wedding and she looked fab if I look that good as pregnant as she was then I will be one hot mama!.  The point is again people know how to dress, and those that don't wouldn't understand the point of putting it on the card, it would go right over their head.
     
  11. You have chosen to ignore posts from jasmine09. Show jasmine09's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    I totally see why putting it on the reception card makes sense.  My cousin's wedding was black tie, and if we hadn't realized we would have felt quite embarrassed to have shown up in cocktail dresses and suits (my family's usual dress-up attire).  EVERYONE at this wedding was in long gowns and tuxedos.  I think if you are concerned, put it on the d*mn card and be done with it.  Just choose your wording carefully.  To me, and to the etiquette guides I consulted, "formal attire"=black tie.  I might select "cocktail attire" or "black tie optional" or something like that for your event.

    And, I totally agree with you that many guests will never notice that sort of info on your website.  
      
     
  12. You have chosen to ignore posts from Sept2010Bride. Show Sept2010Bride's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    In Response to Re: dress code on reception card?:
    I totally see why putting it on the reception card makes sense.  My cousin's wedding was black tie, and if we hadn't realized we would have felt quite embarrassed to have shown up in cocktail dresses and suits (my family's usual dress-up attire).  EVERYONE at this wedding was in long gowns and tuxedos.  I think if you are concerned, put it on the d*mn card and be done with it.  Just choose your wording carefully.  To me, and to the etiquette guides I consulted, "formal attire"=black tie.  I might select "cocktail attire" or "black tie optional" or something like that for your event. And, I totally agree with you that many guests will never notice that sort of info on your website.     
    Posted by jasmine09


    lol, Jasmine. Put it on the card if it is black-tie.
     
  13. You have chosen to ignore posts from octbride09. Show octbride09's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    I'm fully aware that people are going to talk behind my back for some reason about this wedding. There's always going to be a reason..."bad band/dj", "bad food", "too long-too short ceremony"... blah blah blah. If it is this...so be it. I brought it up to my mom (again) and she is still insisting I put it on the additional information card. I don't care what people say.  It's just an additional information card. I've already had my shower..and the only other time I can get the word across to his family is at another family wedding in September. I don't want to be talking about my wedding at his cousin's wedding. My family doesn't live here and is all spread out.
     
  14. You have chosen to ignore posts from pinkkittie27. Show pinkkittie27's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    You are so right, if people are going to talk, they're going to talk. What can you do? Nothing.

    In Response to Re: dress code on reception card?:
    I'm fully aware that people are going to talk behind my back for some reason about this wedding. There's always going to be a reason..."bad band/dj", "bad food", "too long-too short ceremony"... blah blah blah. If it is this...so be it. I brought it up to my mom (again) and she is still insisting I put it on the additional information card. I don't care what people say.  It's just an additional information card. I've already had my shower..and the only other time I can get the word across to his family is at another family wedding in September. I don't want to be talking about my wedding at his cousin's wedding. My family doesn't live here and is all spread out.
    Posted by octbride09

     
  15. You have chosen to ignore posts from Neena101511. Show Neena101511's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    I know this is a few days old but I feel like it applys. My sister got married in March of 08, a church ceremony at 3pm with a cocktail hour and reception to follow from 4:30pm on. She didn't put anything on the invites or return card stating the attire, and all but one couple that came were dressed perfectly respectable. The gentleman a friend of my parents actually wore a pair of blue jeans and bright yellow (like a twinkie) hooded sweatshirt to the ceremony... That was all I could see as I went down the aisle, he was like a beacon for the fashon police. Though they did change for the reception into more then appropriate attire, we still talk about that. Granted my sister didnt' think to much of it that day, but the rest of the wedding party certainly got a good chuckle out of it in the limo :) Just a thought. If it's that important, or will get you sister and mother off your back go for it. But if you feel that you'll be truly offended if someone shows up wearing khakis and a tie then put somthing on the invite so everyone get the message. JMO
     
  16. You have chosen to ignore posts from WhirledPeasPlease. Show WhirledPeasPlease's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    In Response to Re: dress code on reception card?:
    I might select "cocktail attire" or "black tie optional" or something like that for your event.  
    Posted by jasmine09


    I hate the term "black tie optional." Is it black tie or not? If you're going to tell me what to wear, then don't be wishy washy about it.
     
  17. You have chosen to ignore posts from Brighton1. Show Brighton1's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    I still don't get why this matters.  Who cares what people are wearing? 
     
  18. You have chosen to ignore posts from pinkkittie27. Show pinkkittie27's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    LOL, if I were a man who'd invested in a tuxedo I'd be wearing it as much as possible.

    In Response to Re: dress code on reception card?:
    In Response to Re: dress code on reception card? : I hate the term "black tie optional." Is it black tie or not? If you're going to tell me what to wear, then don't be wishy washy about it.
    Posted by WhirledPeasPlease

     
  19. You have chosen to ignore posts from Goodness1. Show Goodness1's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    In Response to Re: dress code on reception card?:
    In Response to Re: dress code on reception card? : I hate the term "black tie optional." Is it black tie or not? If you're going to tell me what to wear, then don't be wishy washy about it.
    Posted by WhirledPeasPlease


    "Black tie optional" means that it's a dressy occasion.  That means you can wear a tuxedo or a dark suit.  And, women wear cocktail or long evening dresses.

    It's not technically telling the guests what to wear, but gives them an idea of what type of wedding it will be.  To be completely honest, I would be embarrassed showing up to a wedding being under dressed (I've never been under dressed for a wedding.  I'd rather go the other way - over dressed).  At least, this way, the guests know how to prepare for the event.
     
  20. You have chosen to ignore posts from lucy7368. Show lucy7368's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    In Response to Re: dress code on reception card?:
    LOL, if I were a man who'd invested in a tuxedo I'd be wearing it as much as possible. In Response to Re: dress code on reception card? :
    Posted by pinkkittie27


    Me, too.  Including, like, to Red Sox games.
     
  21. You have chosen to ignore posts from pinkkittie27. Show pinkkittie27's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    DH was considering buying a tux instead of renting one because, he rationalized, " a lot of my friends and my siblings might get married soon and I'd have many occasion to wear it."
    It's a good thing he didn't, only one of his friends has gotten married. Granted he could have worn it to the weddings of my friends, but I didn't expect those to come along.

    In Response to Re: dress code on reception card?:
    In Response to Re: dress code on reception card? : Me, too.  Including, like, to Red Sox games.
    Posted by lucy7368

     
  22. You have chosen to ignore posts from Peonie. Show Peonie's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    In Response to Re: dress code on reception card?:
    I'm fully aware that people are going to talk behind my back for some reason about this wedding. There's always going to be a reason..."bad band/dj", "bad food", "too long-too short ceremony"... blah blah blah. If it is this...so be it. I brought it up to my mom (again) and she is still insisting I put it on the additional information card. I don't care what people say.  It's just an additional information card. I've already had my shower..and the only other time I can get the word across to his family is at another family wedding in September. I don't want to be talking about my wedding at his cousin's wedding. My family doesn't live here and is all spread out.
    Posted by octbride09

    People always have comments to make about ones weddings. Let them. Who cares. At then end of the day, the most important thing is that you and your hunny are married Kiss
     
  23. You have chosen to ignore posts from heatherv1211. Show heatherv1211's posts

    Re: dress code on reception card?

    To Octbride: I say, do whatever will ease your stress and get your mom to STOP TALKING ABOUT IT.  My guess is that a choice between a happy mom who STOPS harping to you about this issue and a random guest who finds a dress code on the reception card inappropriate, you'll choose the happy mom.  But perhaps I am only speaking from my own mom-issues when it came to wedding planning. :)
     
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