new to board - wedding guest dilemma

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from whatawagSBNy. Show whatawagSBNy's posts

    Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma

         I find it strange people bring up something 40 years old , and accounts filled with untruthful stuff at that, calling TK a murderer,  NOW.  That makes me angry.

         On the bright side, clocktower or whoever has certainly faded into history.

         You know, the one who started the thread and erased himself?
     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from NorthernLghts. Show NorthernLghts's posts

    Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma

    In Response to Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma:
    [QUOTE]I should have never brought it up, and I am sorry that I ever did. Sigh. And yes I am going back to lizinboston....
    Posted by lizinboston[/QUOTE]

    hey! good to know you were able to get your old name back
     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from springandsummer. Show springandsummer's posts

    Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma

     "On the bright side, clocktower or whoever has certainly faded into history.

         You know, the one who started the thread and erased himself?"

    Wow, that's cold.  You guys rip each other apart and then scare off a newby.  I read a lot, and rarely post.   This is why.
     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from lizinboston. Show lizinboston's posts

    Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma

    Oh please! We did not rip her apart, ugh nevermind. I'm not in the mood for starting this AGAIN.

    Thanks, Northern. Yeah, I just edited my profile and changed the email address!!
     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from dkb6248. Show dkb6248's posts

    Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma

    In Response to Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma:
    [QUOTE] "Wow, that's cold.  You guys rip each other apart and then scare off a newby.  I read a lot, and rarely post.   This is why.
    Posted by springandsummer[/QUOTE]

     I, too, have an uncle.
     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from lizinboston. Show lizinboston's posts

    Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma

    dkb, I don't get it??
     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from heatherv1211. Show heatherv1211's posts

    Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma

    In Response to Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma:
    [QUOTE] "On the bright side, clocktower or whoever has certainly faded into history.      You know, the one who started the thread and erased himself?" Wow, that's cold.  You guys rip each other apart and then scare off a newby.  I read a lot, and rarely post.   This is why.
    Posted by springandsummer[/QUOTE]

    So you read the original post before it was deleted?
     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from springandsummer. Show springandsummer's posts

    Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma

    I'm not getting sucked into this.  The way you all rip each other apart regarding Kennedy is sickening.  Then making fun of someone who obviously left the playground is mean spirited.  Sorry I commented - but some of you need a mirror.
     
  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from WhirledPeasPlease. Show WhirledPeasPlease's posts

    Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma

    We like each other. We just disagree sometimes.
     
  10. You have chosen to ignore posts from pinkkittie27. Show pinkkittie27's posts

    Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma

    there is/was one person who posted some nasty things about Kennedy. I and other posters decided we wanted to defend his memory and our right to mourn his passing.

    One person commented about how clock left. Not all of us.

    We are not responsible for every post from every other poster. You cannot lump us all together, we each have our own opinions and viewpoints. This is expressed by occasionally disagreeing with each other.

    The nature and tone of the argument is set by the person who starts it. If people start using nasty language and name-calling, it's responded to in kind.

    In Response to Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma:
    [QUOTE]I'm not getting sucked into this.  The way you all rip each other apart regarding Kennedy is sickening.  Then making fun of someone who obviously left the playground is mean spirited.  Sorry I commented - but some of you need a mirror.
    Posted by springandsummer[/QUOTE]
     
  11. You have chosen to ignore posts from framerican51008. Show framerican51008's posts

    Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma

    In Response to Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma:
    [QUOTE]there is/was one person who posted some nasty things about Kennedy. I and other posters decided we wanted to defend his memory and our right to mourn his passing. One person commented about how clock left. Not all of us. We are not responsible for every post from every other poster. You cannot lump us all together, we each have our own opinions and viewpoints. This is expressed by occasionally disagreeing with each other. The nature and tone of the argument is set by the person who starts it. If people start using nasty language and name-calling, it's responded to in kind. In Response to Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma :
    Posted by pinkkittie27[/QUOTE]

    Thank you Pink!  I am getting really sick of the lumping together!  No, everyone on the boards is not mean and scary.  (Not that I have never had a bad day ;o)
     
  12. You have chosen to ignore posts from pinkkittie27. Show pinkkittie27's posts

    Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma

    exactly. If someone doesn't like something I've posted I don't want them thinking that anyone else except me is responsible for it.

    I also am sick of the "all of you" as if we're some kind of clique in high school. We're not.
    We're more like a group of people who always happen to be in the same class everyday. We come here for our own reasons and with our own ideas. None of us could get any of the others to post or not post.
    And while sometimes we might come here to talk to each other, it's not the primary reason, we mostly come here so we can share our different ideas when people ask. We're capable of agreeing or arguing and not holding grudges.
    Yet we don't pretend to be best friends or ever compliment to be fake.
    We're either honest, or we're silent. We don't lie.

    And people shouldn't be so afraid. We don't bite unless we're bitten.Laughing

    In Response to Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma : Thank you Pink!  I am getting really sick of the lumping together!  No, everyone on the boards is not mean and scary.  (Not that I have never had a bad day ;o)
    Posted by framerican51008[/QUOTE]
     
  13. You have chosen to ignore posts from WhirledPeasPlease. Show WhirledPeasPlease's posts

    Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma

    Pink, I think you just wrote the mission statement. 

    Laughing
     
  14. You have chosen to ignore posts from lizinboston. Show lizinboston's posts

    Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma

    LOL- the BDC wedding forums mission statement.
     
  15. You have chosen to ignore posts from whatawagSBNy. Show whatawagSBNy's posts

    Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma

    In Response to Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma:
    [QUOTE] "On the bright side, clocktower or whoever has certainly faded into history.      You know, the one who started the thread and erased himself?" Wow, that's cold.  You guys rip each other apart and then scare off a newby.  I read a lot, and rarely post.   This is why.
    Posted by springandsummer[/QUOTE]

        Very often when posts start with a single question, then end with a hunded morw posts on various other topics, people say, I hope the OP does not think we had no interest in the OP,  and may refer to the fact that everyone pretty much presented every view on the subject, or that the poster stopped responding long before things went off topic.
       So after reading a few posts pointing out how far afield the 220 or so posts had gone, I was thinking:

    "On the bright side, clocktower or whoever has certainly faded into history.
         You know, the one who started the thread and erased himself?"
       That is, that in the just under hour and a half he/she was here (I thought he, since I was reading every post as it came in until the poster left)  there were no negative posts to chase a person away,  and no off topic ones.  The OP left for his own reasons.  Which I find okay - some people are not treated badly, but when they do not hear what they want, agreement, they absent themselves.

         People went out of their way to say, they were sympathetic with how hard it is to attend a wedding that conflicts with a work schedule.  When he said he as a health care professional could not take off work, people said (honestly and realisticly,  nothing mean ) that he could choose either to decline or arrive late but still in time for much of the reception.  Traffic would not be too bad, etc.
         What OP made clear in 2 posts that he wanted, was approval  for his idea to call his "darling relative" the bride,  now that the invitation arrived with this awful 4 pm Friday time,  and ask her to delay the wedding until 7pm or later when he could be there, or just reschedule the wedding around him.
         Now about quarter of 2,  people did not scream or say ha was expecting too much, or anything bad.  They just pointed out that any time chosen would be a problem  for somebody if thay had a couple hundred guests, and whatever choices the couple made for what they knew of guest's schedules,  and also the reduced costs of a Friday eve wedding, they were not likely to change.
         This is when OP got huffy, said he detected a bitchy tone (not there, read posts up to 1:50 pm. from the starting point.)  and erased posts.
         No one I ever heard of would change a wedding after the invitations went out, for 1 person not immediate family, around a work schedule.  No one was harsh, or nasty.
    Springandsummer- when you wrote"Wow, that's cold.  You guys rip each other apart  and then scare off a newby."  You put a completely different meaning on what I posted than I ever would have dreamed of  (you could have asked, what do you mean , saying it is good he left ?)  if you were being open and nice yourself.  
         You completely made up the business about people ripping each other apart and scaring off a newby,  since there was not 1 single negative (or off topic)  post until after he left, erasing all posts, shortly before 2 pm.

         You insulted everyone by assuming the absolute worst, with no basis at all in fact.  Doesn't that make you the less than pleasant poster?  
                             whatawagSBNy

         Just out of curiosity, if someone asked you directly to support a plan to call up a bride whose wedding had been planned for months,  invitations sent out, and ask a couple weeks before the wedding if she would reschedule the start from 4 pm to 7pm or later  -  would you have said,  what a fine idea?  Really?

        That is what he wanted to hear, he made it quite clear. 
    He chose to erase himself when his repeated posts did not get that answer.
     
  16. You have chosen to ignore posts from springandsummer. Show springandsummer's posts

    Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma

    As I said before, I won't get sucked into this. WAWNY - your synopsis is not how I read the posts.  I believe the OP was a person really looking for advice.  Maybe not the best place to ask a "critical of the bride" question, but it wasn't a warm reception.

    I said it is awful (refering to the Kennedy discussion) that this kind of discourse goes on in a public forum.  I also lamented that a new person comes here and they don't feel comfortable enough to stay.  Please don't twist my words or intent.
     
  17. You have chosen to ignore posts from trex509. Show trex509's posts

    Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma

    whatawagSBNy:  your synopsis is exactly accurate. I was here for all the original posts and it didn't get mean until the OP started getting mad and insulting us.  The OP was basically complaining and looking for us to agree with them.  When we didn't, they got mad, then left.  Seriously, don't post a question in a public forum if you aren't ready to hear the replies.
     
  18. You have chosen to ignore posts from whatawagSBNy. Show whatawagSBNy's posts

    Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma

    In Response to Re: new to board - wedding guest dilemma:
    [QUOTE]whatawagSBNy:  your synopsis is exactly accurate. I was here for all the original posts and it didn't get mean until the OP started getting mad and insulting us.  The OP was basically complaining and looking for us to agree with them.  When we didn't, they got mad, then left.  Seriously, don't post a question in a public forum if you aren't ready to hear the replies.
    Posted by trex509[/QUOTE]

         That is right, and the first post to say,  perhaps the B & G wanted to kind of limit how many would come (which implies that maybe they were willing to invite him, but unlike him, felt the wedding would also be fine if he could not make it )

    was after he erased all of his posts.  So absolutely nothing negative until he found he was not getting support for his idea.

         On an average day, I would expect a few people to say,  it is rather arrogant to think that after all the months or years of planning, signed contracts etc, that they would shift the whole wedding 3 or more hours for one guest.  But everyone refrained from even that rebuke until he was gone. 
         Hence, my thought, well he up and left, we did not chase him away, and all off topic 200 or more posts were after he left.
     

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