OT - Why is everyone so mean

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from allreadymarried. Show allreadymarried's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    I agree with what everyone said. First and foremost you can't take everything personal and someone is always going to disagree or not like what you said or what you are doing. I just think some posters can and have been downright mean. I am not pointing anyone out. We all were quick to say we have done it to different degrees.
     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from Goodness1. Show Goodness1's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    "Instead of addressing the issue at hand - people attacked her for having a 50k ring..."

    I'm sorry, but how is this anyone's business?? Who cares if she has a $50,000 ring or that she told us she did. Why is it anyone's concern and why were there any attacks? That's mean.
     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from framerican51008. Show framerican51008's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    Seriously Pingo? You think this is OK to say?

    "In retrospect - I find her posts like wannabes. Dreaming of things, that will never happen. This is the reason, I kept asking her for her wedding date. She finally came out of the bushes and told us some floating date in May. I sincerely hope for her it is true."

    And for the record, Missy has NOT been on here for years. I have been engaged for 2 1/2 years and she was not here when I first started.
     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    You're welcome, pingo, glad to be there (for both of you). This may be cyberspace, but it is real and and can be difficult. I know, I had my melt down here not too long ago.

    Defensive retorts never quite work the way we hope they will, and instead cause a litany of bad blooded posts and derailed threads. Letting an unfounded, unprovoked attack go, on the other hand, is not a non-response. It is a silent response that speaks well of one's character.

    (This is not an implied agreement that personal attacks have happened. It is an acknowledgement that there is that perception.)
     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from Missy509. Show Missy509's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    [Quote]Hi allready married,
    I do understand your concern. Is has been quite apparent, that there have been more "mean" posts lately. And even though you don't say so directly, I feel you are referring to Missy's and mine lates "disputes".
    Let me first say, I am not a mean person at all. In fact quite the opposite, and I know many posters will agree to that.
    Secondly, referring to the latest post about buying a dress in New York. It was my fault, that I did not read it right. I will be the first to admit that. I did not realize, that the OP was visiting her sister in New York. So I thought it was odd, that a bride - who has so many other things on her mind, should have to travel in order to buy dresses for her BMs. That is what my post was indicating.
    I have been posting here for many years - and so have Missy. I don't know how far it goes back - but Missy definitely have a "thing" about me. The first chance she gets - she will attack me. Like with the NY dress buying - immediately she had to harp:
    How do you figure? Why would her sister need to come to MA? They sell dresses in NY
    .
    Such an unwarranted reply. I know, no one in New York run around naked. These attacks have been going on for quite some time. I will not attack her, but I am just not sitting around here and let her insult me.
    I agree with you - Missy has a lot to contribute to these boards. But one thing I and several others found strange was, that she as a future bride never had anything to contribute to the forum about her own wedding (remember, I am talking about years - not just the past few months). Several times other posters have questioned her about the truth of her marrying. No answer. That I asked her (first time I might add) and pressured her is new for me, but not on these boards. Several posters have wondered and asked her the same thing.
    I appreciate we finally got an answer - and I hope for her it is a true one. I have only the best wishes for her in mind. Hope for her, she has a wonderful wedding day and a long and happy marriage.[/Quote]

    Pingo...can you post about something OTHER than me???

    We get it. You dont like me. FINE. MOVE ON! You are like that bad ex girlfriend or boyfriend that just won't stop dwelling on things and just go away already.
     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from framerican51008. Show framerican51008's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    Agreed - the boards aren't as nice as they used to be. I for one will continue to try to balance out the negativity - though sometimes the negativity is much needed :o)
     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from circles82. Show circles82's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    ...
     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    Pingo and Missy, how about you two agree to not respond to ANY specific posts made by each other at all? That way you both can still participate here and contribute all the great advice and opinions we know you for and leave your personal issue with each other out of it completely. Even "innocuous" responses will be taken out of context, twisted around and turned it into a cat fight, and I'm tired of it, frankly.

    Best to both of you.

    ~kar
     
  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from WhirledPeasPlease. Show WhirledPeasPlease's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    This is a good thread just to get everyone to check themselves before hitting "submit." If we can all agree to leave out inflammatory words while giving a poster who *seems* snarky the benefit of the doubt, then that'll make a difference.

    Hey, maybe some of us work with each other. You never know, right?
     
  10. You have chosen to ignore posts from pingo. Show pingo's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    Thank you kar for your kind words. If you go back (which I certainly do not expect you to do) you will find, that I do NOT and NEVER have replied to any of Missy's posts --- unless she attacks me. But I will not sit back here and let her insult me.
    I truly do not know what her "beef" is. Whatever it is, she will find a way to cut me down. Even in posts, that has absolutely nothing to do with her, her "ugly head" will sick up.
    Just so you - and everyone else - know --- I have NO PERSONAL issues with Missy. Truly, I couldn't care less whether she is getting married or not. But I am sincerely hoping for her it is happening. And I only wish her the very best.
    In retrospect - I find her posts like wannabes. Dreaming of things, that will never happen. This is the reason, I kept asking her for her wedding date. She finally came out of the bushes and told us some floating date in May. I sincerely hope for her it is true.
    No, Missy this post is not for you and you do not need to respond in any way.
    Thanks again kar - You always set everything in perspective. Best to you my dear - Pingo



    [Quote]Pingo and Missy, how about you two agree to not respond to ANY specific posts made by each other at all? That way you both can still participate here and contribute all the great advice and opinions we know you for and leave your personal issue with each other out of it completely. Even "innocuous" responses will be taken out of context, twisted around and turned it into a cat fight, and I'm tired of it, frankly.

    Best to both of you.

    ~kar[/Quote]
     
  11. You have chosen to ignore posts from circles82. Show circles82's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    One can disagree respectfully or agree respectfully without making it a personal affront. We are a varied and diverse crowd, which is great because we have such a variety of opinions. This board is wonderful because people genuinely care and I wouldn't have it any other way. I understand that people are more stressed and under more pressure than normal and I have noticed that it is easier to be short with people instead of taking the extra time lately. I am guilty of that. So, with that, perhaps if we could just take a deep breath and review once before posting, I know we will continue on as preferable (in all other aspects than the broken format itself) to the Knotties. That is something we can unite behind.
     
  12. You have chosen to ignore posts from Goodness1. Show Goodness1's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    You are very nice. Nice night and weekend.

     
  13. You have chosen to ignore posts from Goodness1. Show Goodness1's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    [Quote]We're all people with feelings. Real people. Why would anonymity or the fact that we don't know everything about each other change that? If we remove personal feelings we remove an intangible part of the forum that gives it much value. IMO.

    So instead of hoping we can all be callous, we could instead all be respectful.[/Quote]

    Good point, Kar. It doesn't matter if no one knows who the other is. We're still people here.
     
  14. You have chosen to ignore posts from ALF72. Show ALF72's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    Oh for Pete's sake, pingo, let it go! You do respond to each and every post that Missy makes, or at least 90% of them. Let it freakin' go! Yes, Missy can get carried away at times, but then again, who doesn't? Sometimes she is wrong, but you are really, really going overboard on this post. Please, let it go! Sometimes I think you respond to a post, no matter how innocuous, just b/c Missy wrote it. If she bothers you that much, just don't read what she posts. Otherwise, this post is going to go on for days.

     
  15. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    We're all people with feelings. Real people. Why would anonymity or the fact that we don't know everything about each other change that? If we remove personal feelings we remove an intangible part of the forum that gives it much value. IMO.

    So instead of hoping we can all be callous, we could instead all be respectful.
     
  16. You have chosen to ignore posts from beniceboston. Show beniceboston's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    What bothers me is when someone reads a post, and instead of addressing the main issue of the post, they attack some part of the post. ex. remember that girl who had the 50k e-ring from Tiffany's ... the ring was faulty and she was upset that Tiffany's wasn't backing the purchase.

    Instead of addressing the issue at hand - people attacked her for having a 50k ring...

    sometimes you have to be careful not to give too much or too little information or else people will just run rampant with their own spin on the situation.

    I also dont agee that because these boards are anonymous that people have the "right" to act bitchy to one another... and make ridiculous comments that in a face-to-face situation they would not have the balls to say to the person.
     
  17. You have chosen to ignore posts from pinkkittie18. Show pinkkittie18's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    You can point fingers all day as to who started what and who has "beef", but it won't get you anywhere.
     
  18. You have chosen to ignore posts from lucy7368. Show lucy7368's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    [Quote]That was some fine sarcasm, lucy. :)[/Quote]

    That's actually almost entirely true. :)
     
  19. You have chosen to ignore posts from RosKer. Show RosKer's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    I agree lucy. I went to an all-girls, catholic high school and my social skills only started at college. And everyone says there's a bitchy to pretty ratio... you have to be as pretty as you are bitchy. I guess everyone on here is just drop-dead gorgeous :)

     
  20. You have chosen to ignore posts from Missy509. Show Missy509's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    [Quote]hahhaa...best response ever. I can relate to most of those as well.

    Hence...I now have a WEEKLY "let's play nice" meeting at work with the people I referred to earlier. Ahhhhh....well at least there is beer.[/Quote]

    haha what did you do to those people?
     
  21. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    That's what makes good sarcasm!
     
  22. You have chosen to ignore posts from SilverFestiva. Show SilverFestiva's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    hahhaa...best response ever. I can relate to most of those as well.

    Hence...I now have a WEEKLY "let's play nice" meeting at work with the people I referred to earlier. Ahhhhh....well at least there is beer.
     
  23. You have chosen to ignore posts from pinkkittie18. Show pinkkittie18's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    ugh, I hate smileys in work e-mails! I'm glad to hear you don't use them.
    I would prefer co-workers use double negatives or abbreviations before they start throwing in the smileys.

    [Quote]

    I'm a wannabe lawyer...taking donations for law school...seriously. :-)

    No, I'm in email marketing actually (but someday, I DO want to go to law school). And my marketing "expertise" is not fully welcomed by all at my new job...nor is my lackluster style of communicating. Believe it or not I never use smileys at work, and so apparently that makes me an a-hole. haha!

    I'm being vague b/c you have me all freaked out about the "maybe we work together" concept...hahaa. I need to change my screenname.[/Quote]
     
  24. You have chosen to ignore posts from lucy7368. Show lucy7368's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    Ordinarilly, I would have assumed that this thread was directed solely at me. However, I wasn't here on the 20th. Anyway, I am mean because:

    1) My parents sent me to an all-girls Catholic School. As a result, I had little opportunity to interact with boys, and no opportunity to develop social skills until I graduated.
    2) When I was 18, I discovered that I was attractive enough that it was not necessary to be nice to anyone (But, around the time I hit 25, I started to think that maybe I could try it once in awhile...)
    3) Most people do not understand my sense of humor. This is because, 90% of the time, I am not even remotely funny. The knowledge that I am not funny does not stop me from making bad jokes.
    4) Most people cannot tell when I am kidding. I therefore come across as stupid, rude, or or just plain weird a lot of the time (especially online).
    5) I have a partial disability that results in my being in pain 100% of the time. Pain makes me cranky.
    6) I do not understand social niceties. My mother never taught me these things. As a result, I lack a filter.
    7) I am honest to a fault. I will always tell you the truth. People don't like the truth.

    HTH
     
  25. You have chosen to ignore posts from SilverFestiva. Show SilverFestiva's posts

    OT - Why is everyone so mean

    [Quote]LOL lucy!

    ams, I'm curious about you e-mail indiscretions too...oversensitive judges and attorneys? (You're a lawyer, right, I didn't make that up?)[/Quote]

    I'm a wannabe lawyer...taking donations for law school...seriously. :-)

    No, I'm in email marketing actually (but someday, I DO want to go to law school). And my marketing "expertise" is not fully welcomed by all at my new job...nor is my lackluster style of communicating. Believe it or not I never use smileys at work, and so apparently that makes me an a-hole. haha!

    I'm being vague b/c you have me all freaked out about the "maybe we work together" concept...hahaa. I need to change my screenname.
     

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