RSVP Deadline

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from Reader001. Show Reader001's posts

    RSVP Deadline

    What's the ettiquette for this, does one start calling right away or does one assume people sent the reply on the deadline day and give them a couple days to arrive in the mail? I don't want to hound people, but it's three days before our deadline and the majority have not yet replied...
     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from Goodness1. Show Goodness1's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    I would consider starting to make calls the day after the deadline.  That way, the guests know that you're on it.  If you start calling them beforehand, they might say something like, "It's in the mail!", which is one of the greatest lies, right? 

    Just call them the day after. 
     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from Reader001. Show Reader001's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    Alright, I exagerated; one third have not yet replied.

    Day after sounds reasonable.
     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from Goodness1. Show Goodness1's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    Oh my.  How many replies are you waiting on exactly?
     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from kmt09. Show kmt09's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    I don't really see a problem with calling a few days before the deadline.  You never know; it could take these people awhile to even return your call.  When do you need to have your head count in?

    I just cannot fathom why it is so hard for people to check off the card, put it in the envelope, and stick it in a mailbox!  So annoying!  Can you tell we're also dealing with this?  Wink

     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from Goodness1. Show Goodness1's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    I'm starting to worry about my RSVP's.  My invites haven't even gone out yet, and I'm starting to worry about people taking their sweet time replying.  I remember having to deal with people not calling for my shower.  Just assuming that we "knew" they were coming.  Um, no we don't.  Just send the card back, people!!
     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from tibird. Show tibird's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    So frustrating!!!  I think I was bothered more by people saying "well, I can't find it... I'm sure it will turn up & I'll mail it then".  Seriously?  I know my wedding isn't the most important thing to other people (nor should it be) but for some reason, hearing that drove me batty!
    We had a bunch yet to reply by the cut off.  I held DH off for 2 days before calling & we got 5 or 6 in 2 days after.  Seems lots of people waited until the reply by date to get it in the mail.  Strange, but I guess it's typical.
     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from Goodness1. Show Goodness1's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    I think it's typical.  I don't know if they forget, don't care, or think they can just get away without replying at all, and no one will be the wiser.  Who knows how some of these minds work, but it's certainly frustrating.  I agree with you, though.  I don't think that my wedding is the number 1 priority for people, but if you see that you have a deadline at work, do you just bypass it?  Do you wait on your supervisor/manager to "remind" you to do your job or to get something done by its deadline?  I certainly hope not.  I get my work done by deadline, and I definitely RSVP, as well.  I know how annoying it can be waiting on someone else to get their work done, so you can get yours done. 
     
  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from dkb6248. Show dkb6248's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    We had a handful of people say they lost them.  And those we had it call, it was mostly the guys that hadn't respond.  DH's brother, and best man, told him he wasn't going to send his back because we knew he was coming.  DH was like "but we put a stamp on it!"
     
  10. You have chosen to ignore posts from Goodness1. Show Goodness1's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    Honestly folks, it's not a big deal.  I hate excuses as to WHY people don't respond when asked to.  All they have to do is check off "yes" or "no" and drop it in a mailbox.  Heck, I even have a drop off box at my apartment building, and at my work place.  It's SO easy!!!  Not just that, you could easily just leave it in your own mailbox at home, and the mailman will pick it up, too.  Doesn't get any easier!!!
     
  11. You have chosen to ignore posts from Sept2010Bride. Show Sept2010Bride's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    I'm sorry, but it takes all of 2 minutes to mark off "accept" "decline" and then drop it in the mail.

    No excuses...I can't stand it! I ALWAYS send mine in right away, so I won't forget! People actually tease me because they get my response back about 5 days after the invites go out!
     
  12. You have chosen to ignore posts from tibird. Show tibird's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    Exactly Goodness!  The energy it took to call or email an excuse to me is probably more than it would take to check your purse or just check it off & mail it.  But peoples is peoples & that's what people do.

    But enough venting from me... the short answer to the OP is I would wait 2 days after the deadline to catch any that are "postmarked" by the deadline.  It saved us a bunch of phone calls!
     
  13. You have chosen to ignore posts from pinkkittie27. Show pinkkittie27's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    I think people worry so much that if they commit either way that things will change and they'll feel like a heel for having to call you and tell you they need to rescind their RSVP.
    I agree that there's no excuse. Check it and stick it in the mail. If plans change, they change, and you cross that bridge when you get to it.
     
  14. You have chosen to ignore posts from dkb6248. Show dkb6248's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    In Response to Re: RSVP Deadline:
    [QUOTE]But peoples is peoples & that's what people do. Posted by tibird[/QUOTE]

    LOL!  This reminds me of Pete's speech from Muppets Take Manhattan. 

    "Hey frog, I'll tell you what is. Big city, hm? Live, work, huh? But. Not in the open. Only peoples. Peoples is peoples. No is buildings. Is tomatoes, huh? Is peoples. Is dancing, is music, is potatoes. So, peoples is peoples. Okay?"

     
  15. You have chosen to ignore posts from Reader001. Show Reader001's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    We have 29 not yet responded. I always send mine back the next day. I'm usually one of the first replies.

    However, the thing that bugs me is when the sent our reply postcards in an envelope with another card. Dude, I put a stamp on it for you, you really could have just marked it "decline" and then sent it, you really didn't have to buy another card, put them both in an envelope and put your own stamp on there just to tell me you can't come! HAHA!
     
  16. You have chosen to ignore posts from Reader001. Show Reader001's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    Oh, and I put my deadline a week before the date my venue needs the final numbers to give myself room to make the calls. I just didn't think I would be making 29 phone calls!
     
  17. You have chosen to ignore posts from Sept2010Bride. Show Sept2010Bride's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    SO annoying!!!!

    I will say this...my parents are inviting so many of their friends. And if any of them flake out on sending the response cards, than it is my parents responsibility to call them, because I won't deal with that....
     
  18. You have chosen to ignore posts from Goodness1. Show Goodness1's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    All the invitation are going out from my parents' home.  My fiance and I are responsible for contacting our guests in case they don't RSVP.  My parents for their guests, and his parents for their guests.  It's as fair as we can get.  I just hope no one has to make any phone calls.

     
  19. You have chosen to ignore posts from luvRIboy. Show luvRIboy's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    We were lucky...only had about 6 invitations out of 127 sent that we didn't hear back from by 2 days after the deadline. 

    I feel like there are 4 categories of RSVPers:
    1. Right away: I know I'm going to be there, or that I can't be.
    2. Not sure, I have to work out babysitter (travel, work, whatever), I'll send it close to deadline when I know.
    3. Assume you know I'm coming (often the bridal party, immediate family, people who have never planned a wedding) or that I'm not (because I didn't respond)
    4. I never open my mail or respond to anything...did I even get it?  I must have lost it. 

     
  20. You have chosen to ignore posts from WhirledPeasPlease. Show WhirledPeasPlease's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    3 couples (out of 33) on my side of the family RSVPed.

    Yup.
     
  21. You have chosen to ignore posts from Reader001. Show Reader001's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    HAHA! I am not alone.
     
  22. You have chosen to ignore posts from preserves. Show preserves's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    my FI's friends are infamous for not rsvp'ing b.c they always attend. However, I spread the word as the date grew closer that those who didn't send the card back would automatically get veggie meals...since they all are serious carnivores we only. unfortunately i could not apply the same rule to some extended family members who rsvp'd via voicemail with two guests when they were invited as a single---gotta love it.
     
  23. You have chosen to ignore posts from Sept2010Bride. Show Sept2010Bride's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    In Response to Re: RSVP Deadline:
    [QUOTE]my FI's friends are infamous for not rsvp'ing b.c they always attend. However, I spread the word as the date grew closer that those who didn't send the card back would automatically get veggie meals...since they all are serious carnivores we only. unfortunately i could not apply the same rule to some extended family members who rsvp'd via voicemail with two guests when they were invited as a single---gotta love it.
    Posted by preserves[/QUOTE]

    LOL. love it! :)
     
  24. You have chosen to ignore posts from preserves. Show preserves's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    it worked !!! all of those who are coming rsvp'd with the meals they wanted to eat that day--we only had 6 who didn't rsvp at all and 2 of the 6 are from another country.
     
  25. You have chosen to ignore posts from ajuly09. Show ajuly09's posts

    Re: RSVP Deadline

    Yeap just FI's friends and a few randoms didn't respond. We only had to call a few people out of 200..thought that was pretty good.  Now we are just dealing with the, well actually my date is not coming..4 days before the wedding..So now we are paying for that date's food and drinks.  We are prob. going to let someone else bring a date that was not invited with one!   
     

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