Two weddings - do I give 2 gifts?

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from Trouble30. Show Trouble30's posts

    Two weddings - do I give 2 gifts?

    I have a good friend who married an Indian guy in India last December.  I was unable to attend the wedding, but I sent her a cash gift.  I found out afterwards that she's also having an American wedding which is coming right up.  I will be attending this one.  So, do I give another gift? 

    I guess I should also divulge that I'm a bridesmaid and she was a bridesmaid at my wedding.  I'm not trying to be mean or anything, but times are tough and my husband and I are flying to the second weddding ($$), dress ($$$), etc., etc...

    Thoughts?

     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from lucy7368. Show lucy7368's posts

    Re: Two weddings - do I give 2 gifts?

    No.
     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from ALF72. Show ALF72's posts

    Re: Two weddings - do I give 2 gifts?

    I think a card will be more than sufficient for the American style wedding.  Good luck. 
     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from pinkkittie27. Show pinkkittie27's posts

    Re: Two weddings - do I give 2 gifts?

    I agree, you gave a generous gift the first time, a card is enough for the second time.
     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from WhirledPeasPlease. Show WhirledPeasPlease's posts

    Re: Two weddings - do I give 2 gifts?

    I don't understand this new trend of multiple weddings...but no, you've already given a gift, and that's enough.
     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from heatherv1211. Show heatherv1211's posts

    Re: Two weddings - do I give 2 gifts?

    ditto the others.  1 husband, 1 gift. :)
     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from Goodness1. Show Goodness1's posts

    Re: Two weddings - do I give 2 gifts?

    A card.
     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from downtoearth. Show downtoearth's posts

    Re: Two weddings - do I give 2 gifts?

    I wouldn't.

    The gift is to celebrate her getting married.  Not an admission fee.

    You already gave her a gift.  Enjoy the wedding!!
     
  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from Trouble30. Show Trouble30's posts

    Re: Two weddings - do I give 2 gifts?

    I like that "The gift is to celebrate her getting married.  Not an admission fee." 

    Thanks ladies!
     
  10. You have chosen to ignore posts from trex509. Show trex509's posts

    Re: Two weddings - do I give 2 gifts?

    I agree with the others, one gift is plenty.

    To the question about multiple weddings:  when Indians have a mixed marriages it is common to have 2 ceremonies, one American style and one Hindu ceremony.  Sometimes they do them in the same day, sometimes on different days.  This way they celebrate both traditions/religions.  In this case it sounds like they had one wedding in India with the groom's family (probably was easier for them to fly to India than to have his large family fly here.  Indian weddings in India are HUGE, sometimes as many as 500 guests) and then the American wedding here.  But, yes, you only need to give one gift.
     
  11. You have chosen to ignore posts from cosmogirl. Show cosmogirl's posts

    Re: Two weddings - do I give 2 gifts?

    No, of course two gifts are not required.  Personally, I would give her some small acknowledgement of her "second wedding" -- a picture frame and a lovely letter wishing her and DH well. 

     
  12. You have chosen to ignore posts from ash. Show ash's posts

    Re: Two weddings - do I give 2 gifts?

    No second gift.  Card not necessary either.
     
  13. You have chosen to ignore posts from pingo. Show pingo's posts

    Re: Two weddings - do I give 2 gifts?

    Trouble - no trouble at all!
    You do not have to give  a second gift. In India they give money gifts (so you actually did the right thing). Whatever one can afford (usually 101 Rupees - always ending in an uneven number - which is less than $5). And they have a trusted friend/relative following the bride and the groom to write down in a book, what whoever gave what - so when the other party have a wedding, they can reciprocate.
    I have attended several "double" weddings. Mixed couples will often have two ceremonies. If done here, they will most likely do them the same day. I have attended weddings, where the Hindu ceremony was done first and then the bride and groom changed into western attire - gown, tux  and all - and the Christian ceremony took place. Or visa versa. I have also attended weddings that was originally done in the grooms' or the brides' home country - then having the second ceremony for friends and relatives here not being able to travel abroad.
    If I were you, I would just go and enjoy the wedding and the party.  Absolute no gift needed.



     

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