Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from downtoearth. Show downtoearth's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    In Response to Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes:
    [QUOTE]this is a test.  how come I can't 'reply?' There are only 'report abuse' and 'ignore' buttons on the posts - no 'reply' button. At first I thought the thread was closed, then I worried I'd been banned.
    Posted by downtoearth[/QUOTE]

    wow!  the reply button is back - was it me????
     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from lucy7368. Show lucy7368's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    In Response to Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes : Lucy, the host is offering juice, soda and water free of charge to you. They are not expecting you to pay for drinks. They are providing drinks and that is what is going to make them a good host. If you don't like what they are offering, you are free to purchase something other than what they provide. When a wedding does not offer an open bar but offers other drinks of choice for free, that is perfectly acceptable.
    Posted by Missy509[/QUOTE]

    I'm not talking about what other people provide.  I am talking about what I provide, when I host a gathering.  I want my guests to have a variety of drink choices, including alcohol.

    As we discussed on the Vegetarian thread, when I attend an event hosted by someone else, I usually don't like about 90% of what they're serving.  I learned to deal a long time ago.  Cool

    ETA:  Goodness, do you remember the drink tickets thread last summer?  That was awesome.  "It's a wedding, not a carnival." (I think AB said that...)
     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from Peonie. Show Peonie's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    I've actually been to a wedding at The Charles Hotel and they had drink tickets.

    And no Lucy, you would come as a guest. And you would have to sing one Madonna song.
     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from Goodness1. Show Goodness1's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    In Response to Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes : ETA:  Goodness, do you remember the drink tickets thread last summer?  That was awesome.  "It's a wedding, not a carnival." (I think AB said that...)
    Posted by lucy7368[/QUOTE]

    Ha, I actually don't remember that, but it's hilarious!
     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from pinkkittie27. Show pinkkittie27's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    My rational here is that I couldn't substitue anything else for the alcohol and have it make sense to charge my guests for it. Such as:

    So then why not offer my guests an option to order the filet mignon as long as they're willing to pay the extra $8 it would cost to serve it?
    I mean some folks might prefer steak(drink) to the chicken(soda), but all I've got money for is the chicken.(soda) If they want the steak(drink), why not pass on that cost to them? So those who are okay with chicken(soda) will get it for free, but those who want the upgrade, steak(drink), will have to pay extra. I know I don't have to offer them steak(drink) and that chicken(soda) would be just fine, but just in case they might want the upgrade, I'll offer it and just have them pay for it.
    That doesn't make any sense. If I couldn't afford the steak, then I just wouldn't serve it. I wouldn't serve it and charge for it.

    I wouldn't do that to my guests. I will serve what I can afford. If I can't afford the alcohol, I either will do BYOB or tell folks there won't be any alcohol served at dinner, but if we want to go to a bar afterwards we're all free to do so.

    In Response to Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes : Lucy, the host is offering juice, soda and water free of charge to you. They are not expecting you to pay for drinks. They are providing drinks and that is what is going to make them a good host. If you don't like what they are offering, you are free to purchase something other than what they provide. When a wedding does not offer an open bar but offers other drinks of choice for free, that is perfectly acceptable.
    Posted by Missy509[/QUOTE]
     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from ash. Show ash's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    I know I said I was done, but what I think is funny is that people are all actually agreeing on one point...you don't need alcohol at a wedding.

    The open bar people are saying:  You don't need to serve alcohol at a wedding so if you can't afford to pay for the bar bill, don't serve alcohol. 

    The cash bar people are saying:  You don't need to serve alcohol at a wedding so if you can't afford to pay for the bar bill, have the guests pay for it if they want it.
     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from lucy7368. Show lucy7368's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    In Response to Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes:
    [QUOTE]I've actually been to a wedding at The Charles Hotel and they had drink tickets. And no Lucy, you would come as a guest. And you would have to sing one Madonna song.
    Posted by Peonie[/QUOTE]

    Well, I certainly hope you're planning to provide ear plugs for your poor guests!  Surprised
     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from ash. Show ash's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    In Response to Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes : Darling, the only people you "have" to have at your wedding are you, the groom, the officiant, and two witnesses (who, I imagine, have to be over 18).
    Posted by lucy7368[/QUOTE]

    You do not need witnesses. 
     
  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from Peonie. Show Peonie's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    Well, I am actually planning on having an open bar...LOL after all that arguing that I think it's not a big deal if there is open bar or not, but my boyfriend and his family or my my parents wouldn't have it any other way, so we will make sure that the guests are nice and tipsy by the time you sing.
     
  10. You have chosen to ignore posts from Missy509. Show Missy509's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    In Response to Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes:
    [QUOTE]I know I said I was done, but what I think is funny is that people are all actually agreeing on one point...you don't need alcohol at a wedding. The open bar people are saying:  You don't need to serve alcohol at a wedding so if you can't afford to pay for the bar bill, don't serve alcohol.  The cash bar people are saying:  You don't need to serve alcohol at a wedding so if you can't afford to pay for the bar bill, have the guests pay for it if they want it.
    Posted by ash[/QUOTE]

    Exactly Ash. The host should provide meal and drink. What they choose to provide for meal and drink is up to them. If you do not like the meal, eat beforehand or grab food after, if you do not like the provided drink, buy what you do like. What is the big deal?

    It is not required for a wedding host to provide alcohol free of charge to her/his guests.
     
  11. You have chosen to ignore posts from Goodness1. Show Goodness1's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    I'm going to have open bar, we're paying for all our guests' flights and hotels, buying their outfits, getting all their hair and make-up done, personally giving them all showers, shaving their legs, facials (what have you), we're also paying for them to have a week-long vacation in Aruba. 

    Just as a thank you for coming and celebrating our special day with us.  It's the LEAST we could do, right???
     
  12. You have chosen to ignore posts from pinkkittie27. Show pinkkittie27's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    Well I'm going to charge for a salad bar,as that's extra and I don't HAVE to provide it. Salad isn't required. And maybe I'll charge for having a seat, people don't NEED chairs, they could eat standing up. Seats aren't required. Then maybe I'll charge for napkins, people don't NEED napkins, they can just use their hands. Napkins aren't required. Come to think of it, you don't NEED silverware to eat, so maybe I'll have my guests pick up that cost too! Silverware isn't required.
    Gosh, I'm saving so much money now! Who knew being a host was so cheap and easy?!

    In Response to Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes:
    [QUOTE]I'm going to have open bar, we're paying for all our guests flights and hotels, buying their outfits, getting all their hair and make-up done, personally giving them all showers, shaving their legs, facials (what have you), we're also paying for them to have a week-long vacation in Aruba.  Just as a thank you for coming and celebrating our special day with us.  It's the LEAST we could do, right???
    Posted by Goodness1[/QUOTE]
     
  13. You have chosen to ignore posts from Peonie. Show Peonie's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    Well, my bf has told me he would never have a wedding without an open bar, fine, then he can pay for that.
    On the whole vegetarian thing, sometimes if there is a vegetarian option on the reply card, I will check it off, cause I LOVE pasta, hehe!
     
  14. You have chosen to ignore posts from Goodness1. Show Goodness1's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    I'm going to also give them money as another thank you for coming. 

    And, I'll pay for the gas to their cars, and their groceries for a year.  Another nice touch and thank you for coming to our wedding and celebrating the pure and happy blissful event of my fiance and I becoming husband and wife.  SO, THANK YOU.

     
  15. You have chosen to ignore posts from Peonie. Show Peonie's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    Wait, what? Goodness...was that a joke?
     
  16. You have chosen to ignore posts from Peonie. Show Peonie's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    I'm so confused........................................................
     
  17. You have chosen to ignore posts from Goodness1. Show Goodness1's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    In Response to Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes:
    [QUOTE]Wait, what? Goodness...was that a joke?
    Posted by Peonie[/QUOTE]

    Ha, ha... yeah.  I'm a little tired today.  And, realizing more and more that no one is ever happy with anything provided to them.  Whether it be the bride, groom, MIL, FIL, MOB, FOB, guests, friends, family, whatever. 
     
  18. You have chosen to ignore posts from Peonie. Show Peonie's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    I just don't understand why we are still arguing over this. It's really going nowhere....
     
  19. You have chosen to ignore posts from Goodness1. Show Goodness1's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

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    [QUOTE]I just don't understand why we are still arguing over this. It's really going nowhere....
    Posted by Peonie[/QUOTE]

    Ha, ha... I am because now I'm in the mood.  I'm a grump today.  I think I'm really arguing the fact that nothing is ever good enough.  That's another tough lesson I've learned lately.
     
  20. You have chosen to ignore posts from Missy509. Show Missy509's posts

    Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes

    In Response to Re: Wedding Guests' Secret Gripes:
    [QUOTE]I'm going to have open bar, we're paying for all our guests' flights and hotels, buying their outfits, getting all their hair and make-up done, personally giving them all showers, shaving their legs, facials (what have you), we're also paying for them to have a week-long vacation in Aruba.  Just as a thank you for coming and celebrating our special day with us.  It's the LEAST we could do, right???
    Posted by Goodness1[/QUOTE]

    Goodness, better make sure those are first class tix. Don't cheap out and just buy coach...
     

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