Facebook Nonsense

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from Another-Veronica. Show Another-Veronica's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    Everything that jannicjay wrote.

    Jneen, Sorry you had to go through that high & low. Definitely his loss.  

    There's always someone better in ones future..... right?  Smile
     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    If a little online flirting gets you going, go for it.

    Just keep your expectations in check. Nothing is real until you meet in person.
    ----


    Well, it "gets me going," but I want more. I guess he doesn't? Or does? Update - one more phone call, online flirting every few days. long text chatting every few days. I haven't posted here for a while, because I feel this cycle could go on and on. I may tire of it soon if he doesn't ask me the big question - "RDG. will you come visit me? Come see me for a weekend."
     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    In Response to Re: Facebook Nonsense:
    [QUOTE]Everyone has had someone where they wanted to click their heels and believe. If only the universe would bow to your will ... but then life would be crushingly boring so maybe fate has it's purpose.
    Posted by Corporate-Hippie-Chick[/QUOTE]

    To labor, and not seek reward. -- Stg Ignatius, St Kevin, Pirkei Avot, & etc,.
     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    In Response to Re: Facebook Nonsense:
    [QUOTE]J9- great story, nice of you to share it. RDG, do you think maybe you should hide him on FB for now? It seems as if you are watching and waiting for any little crumb of acknowledgement and attention from him. I've been there, more recently than I like to admit.
    Posted by softpatina[/QUOTE]

    I thought of it. I thought of it this week. I tired of seeing 40 women and just 1 or 2 men clamor for his attention every time he posted something. No, not tired of it, was envious, to be honest. People he's never met, a lot of them. He's not a rock star. He's not a movie star. What he is, is, is very creatively talented, and that's seductive. Heck, I get flattered too when someone comments on my work. Why shouldn't he have the adulation? He's earned them through his work. I was flattered when he noticed me (he a friend of a friend). I'm not jealous of his work. But I don't want to be one of these women he speaks with well into the night on everything from art to how we'll seduce each other. He gets *so* close, and allows me to get *so* close. But when I start hinting at meeting him, he shuts down. Just the other day I asked if we could go for dinner before or after his demio - the three of us, not alone (so he wouldn't feel pressured). He ignored my question.
     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    In Response to Re: Facebook Nonsense:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Facebook Nonsense : You don't realize that's what you're doing until you step back or it's run it's course and it ends. Then you see it wasn't much of anything to begin with. It feels significant in the beginning because it's new and you're hoping it develops into more. Kind of like waiting to see how hard Irene is going to hit. That might live up to all the hype either. Until a guy puts in some real effort and there's a real date, it's all just words blowing in the wind.
    Posted by softpatina[/QUOTE]

    I am willing to travel to his neck of the woods. He'll be in mine. I've had happy LDRs.

    But it's been a while now since we first started writing. When I was seeing Mississippi Man (MM), he booked a plane ride for me within our first three days of chatting (combo email and phone). MM decided he wanted to see me; asked; told me I wouldn't have to pay for it (and I had the funds then, actually - but he was trying to make it as easy as possible for me to get down there). Within 10 days of our first phone call, I was in Jackson.

    Of course, a hurricane intervened in the past few weeks. He wasn't hit, his home is fine. but a lot of his friends were hit hard.

    I think I had a meltdown this week with this. I was going to a concert, a woman singer. He made a comment about me crushing on her - which I don't. It was one of those HNG comments some men sometimes make about bi women. You know, they get all horned out just thinking about a woman loving another women. I read him the riot act about that. He's supposedly progressive. I should have just ignored his comment.
     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    In Response to Re: Facebook Nonsense:
    [QUOTE]Everything that jannicjay wrote. Jneen, Sorry you had to go through that high & low. Definitely his loss.   There's always someone better in ones future..... right? 
    Posted by Another-Veronica[/QUOTE]

    ~~sigh~~ I suppose. ~~sigh~~

    Also, I've had too much time on my hands the past couple of weeks. Back to the real world for me on Thursday. My mind wanders about these things (guys) when I'm not occupied.
     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    In Response to Re: Facebook Nonsense:
    [QUOTE]I prefer texting with people who use real words. My geek friends appreciate txts containing words like "denouement".
    Posted by ThatJneenGrrl[/QUOTE]

    I like that word.

    I also like the Phoenicians, well, I mostly like them. They did one thing that really depresses me.
     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    I'm also kinda pissed. He's created a new work, but won't let me see pics of it until he shows it in Boston this month. In other words, for all my fabulosity to him (/sarcasm), I don't rate even a pic of some bit of pottery. Yes, we artists can be a secretive lot (we don't want to jinx the work - hence, "break a leg," etc), but it felt distant to me.
     
  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    Posts: 2920
    First: 1/12/2006
    Last: 8/29/2011
    RDG- I just got through reading this and a few things strike me. Do you realize how many times you put this guy on a pedestal and put yourself down? You mention it as far as intelligence and artistic ability. It's already like he is untouchable and you are unworthy and that surprises me because you are a woman with a hell of a lot of intelligence and have an awful lot to offer. In other words, honey, you ain't no slouch! I agree with a lot thats been said here already - I do believe that men like the thrill of the chase and anything made too easy is not challenging enough. Also, as much as you may be sympathetic that he has no place to stay, you are under no obligation to house this guy and his partner and should not feel bad about it either. I totally get that this man is fabulous in your eyes, but it's not gonna be right until you are fabulous in his eyes. Holly.                     
    ----

    Holly, I do feel that he's a hunter no so much interested in the prey as in the hunt.

    Thank you for the compliment. But he is brighter. Not as handsome as some (in my eyes) - in fact the male Lovelies are a lot cuter, the one I met and the ones I've seen in pics. He just, you know, has that energy that I dig. He's traveled a rough road of his own making, and he's made it. and his work is fantastic. He had a rough childhood and a couple of tough marriages, and he made it through all that intact. Yeah, a lot of people have. But he noticed ... me.

    However, I won't deal with breadcrumbs, not much longer anyway. Either he acts (or lets me act should I decide to invite myself), or I shall do what SP suggested, and block his posts for a while.

    It's flattering when a man tells you you're an amazing, unique woman, and cites all your talents and what he loves about your personality. But although I like to move slowly, I don't like moving this slowly. And when he went silent when I asked if we could meet for dinner, I think I received my answer, hurricane or not.

    Thanks again, Holly.

    And to all of you ... for your earthy realism and compassion, both. I have a right to live strong. But, you know, I liked him so much ... . If only I had shut down when he first started to sweet-talk me ... but how could I have known then?
     
  10. You have chosen to ignore posts from ThatJneenGrrl. Show ThatJneenGrrl's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    I say put the boy to the side for now.

    Let the others adore him.

    If he truly wants to spend time with you, he will seek you out.  Like when you have a friend in a band, and after the show he gets mobbed with groupies, but will seek you out to say hello and thank you for being there, and ask if you are stopping by for a cookout later in the week.  There is no need to be one of the squeeing masses clamoring for attention.

    You are wonderful and brilliant and quirky and amazing.  Wear it like a Cloak of Awesomeness.  Step back and glow.

    Be freeckin' fabulous. :)
     
  11. You have chosen to ignore posts from bzorn22. Show bzorn22's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    "It's flattering when a man tells you you're an amazing, unique woman, and cites all your talents
    and what he loves about your personality"

    It is flattering to be flattered but what is more certain is when he shows you. You are getting stuck between what he says and what he shows. In that kind of a situation, go with what he shows. 

     
  12. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    In Response to Re: Facebook Nonsense:
    [QUOTE]I say put the boy to the side for now. Let the others adore him. If he truly wants to spend time with you, he will seek you out.  Like when you have a friend in a band, and after the show he gets mobbed with groupies, but will seek you out to say hello and thank you for being there, and ask if you are stopping by for a cookout later in the week.  There is no need to be one of the squeeing masses clamoring for attention. You are wonderful and brilliant and quirky and amazing.  Wear it like a Cloak of Awesomeness.  Step back and glow. Be freeckin' fabulous. :)
    Posted by ThatJneenGrrl[/QUOTE]

    Great analogy, Jneen!

    (I don't know about all the other stuff you said about me [quirky, yes] - but thanks! You made my day.)

    Yep, I'm not going to get lost anymore in all those who post on every minor thing he says, telling him how awesome he is. He is, but modest men are also attractive.

    He sort of came out of nowhere. I friended him more than a year ago, as a friend of a friend and as someone who's work I like. Then all of a sudden, he was writing. So, I shall return to being the modest, quiet one (not on LL, but with him Laughing). Let him wonder what happened to me, if he does.
     
  13. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    go with what he shows.

    Agreed, bzorn. Right now he's not showing. Except for collecting women from all over the world. I can't stop him from toying with them, but I can prevent hgim from toying with me.:

    In silence and movement you can show the reflection of people.
    www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/m/marcelmarc115714.html">Marcel Marceau
     
  14. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    So now I know online people come and go. ~~sigh~~ Some other missy must have caught his eye. He just called posted a video by a pretty singer he knows in r/l, calling her an "enchantress." Also a lot of lol cats videos.

    I really need to block him for a bit, as SP suggested.

    As Stevie Nicks says:

    "It's a shame that you wanted me/
    You didn't try"

    Time for some thicker reindeer skin. I hope I can grow it.
     
  15. You have chosen to ignore posts from softpatina. Show softpatina's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    In Response to Re: Facebook Nonsense:
    [QUOTE]So now I know online people come and go. ~~sigh~~ Some other missy must have caught his eye. He just called posted a video by a pretty singer he knows in r/l, calling her an "enchantress." Also a lot of lol cats videos. I really need to block him for a bit, as SP suggested. As Stevie Nicks says: "It's a shame that you wanted me/ You didn't try" Time for some thicker reindeer skin. I hope I can grow it.
    Posted by reindeergirl[/QUOTE]

    You can and will do this. Everyone is pretty much in agreement over this so please spare yourself the emotinal turmoil and heed the advice. We've all been there and would hate to see you continue. It's getting in the way of you getting what you say you want.
    And bzorn is right...let his actions tell you who he is. By his actions, as in responding so colorfully to so many others, he shows he needs the attention and admiration of many. One woman, no matter how special, will be enough for him.
    Be strong and hide him. Smile
     
  16. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    Gah! He's has some fame in his own right - but can't pay his phone bill before shutoff time calls. I'm broke too, but communication with the outside world is a hard limit for me. God forbid an emergency, and all that jazz. He has children! What if they need to reach him?

    (I didn't call him, he sent out a general announcement to his 1 million nearest and dearest friends.)
     
  17. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    I feel like today's LW, softpatina. I've been unable to block him. So, until I do, I'll go silent here, rather than ask for more advice I haven't taken. However, the smoking and phone may push me back from the cliff edge and on to solid ground.
     
  18. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    Never mind.

    Done.

    Profile blocked.

    I thank you. and all the Lovelies, for giving me a spine on this one.
     
  19. You have chosen to ignore posts from hollygolitely-. Show hollygolitely-'s posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    Good Luck with it RDG - you are ultimately doing the right thing even if it doesn't feel very good at the time.
     
  20. You have chosen to ignore posts from bzorn22. Show bzorn22's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    In Response to Re: Facebook Nonsense:
    [QUOTE]So now I know online people come and go. ~~sigh~~ Some other missy must have caught his eye. He just called posted a video by a pretty singer he knows in r/l, calling her an "enchantress." Also a lot of lol cats videos. I really need to block him for a bit, as SP suggested. As Stevie Nicks says: "It's a shame that you wanted me/ You didn't try" Time for some thicker reindeer skin. I hope I can grow it.
    Posted by reindeergirl[/QUOTE]

    It is getting colder. The fur will become thicker and more luxurious.


     
  21. You have chosen to ignore posts from softpatina. Show softpatina's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    In Response to Re: Facebook Nonsense:
    [QUOTE]Never mind. Done. Profile blocked. I thank you. and all the Lovelies, for giving me a spine on this one.
    Posted by reindeergirl[/QUOTE]


    wow- proud of you rdg- that was hard

    and don't feel you have to stop talking here, I for one am happy to keep it up when I see you making progress

    I've had friends do the same for me, so consider it the paying it forward concept
     
  22. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    In Response to Re: Facebook Nonsense:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Facebook Nonsense : It is getting colder. The fur will become thicker and more luxurious.
    Posted by bzorn22[/QUOTE]

    Wow - that's sensual imagery!Smile
     
  23. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    In Response to Re: Facebook Nonsense:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Facebook Nonsense : wow- proud of you rdg- that was hard and don't feel you have to stop talking here, I for one am happy to keep it up when I see you making progress I've had friends do the same for me, so consider it the paying it forward concept
    Posted by softpatina[/QUOTE]

    Thanks so much, SP. I appreciate it. I do.
     
  24. You have chosen to ignore posts from reindeergirl. Show reindeergirl's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    In Response to Re: Facebook Nonsense:
    [QUOTE]Good Luck with it RDG - you are ultimately doing the right thing even if it doesn't feel very good at the time.
    Posted by hollygolitely-[/QUOTE]

    Thanks, Holly. I'll get over him. I hope I end up feeling that the more important thing is learning from Internet nonsense.
     
  25. You have chosen to ignore posts from Loud-Mouthed-Broad. Show Loud-Mouthed-Broad's posts

    Re: Facebook Nonsense

    Now I'm doubting myself.  

    Highly intelligent professor guy and I chatted a lot over the weekend - but I got nervous and shut him down.

    He deleted his online profile on OKC - but we chatted on his blog again today.
     

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