LL Advice for IP

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from Inter-Planet. Show Inter-Planet's posts

    LL Advice for IP

     
     
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    Re: LL Advice for IP

    It sounds like you need to wrap your mind around the fact that you and he are much more different than you thought before this happened...if it bothers you, that is, and it seems it does.  I'm sorry you were surprised by him in this way - there are good surprises about people's character, and there are these kinds. :(
     
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    Re: LL Advice for IP

    IP....... It sounds to me like you're getting played.  
     
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    Re: LL Advice for IP

    He's cheating on the two of you (his other woman/you), IP. You don't deserve it, and neither does she.

    If he wanted more from you when you wanted something less intense, he should have had that discussion with you before he turned elsewhere. He's a coward.

    And, frankly, I feel he should have kept his hands off you while he was telling you about the other woman. I had a BF who pulled a related matter on me - once. We were snuggling in bed, when he told me he wanted to bring another woman into the relationship. We'd be a happy three some (BDC won't let me say the word). IP, that was not the time for my BF to tell me. I should have been able to be wide awake, and thinking with clarity. Your man used the cuddling to get you to be on his side.

    I wish you the best. You will find someone who loves you, and you alone. You will.
     
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    Re: LL Advice for IP

    I'm sorry.  That's really awful.  I'd be very mad.  Seems like he was fishing for you to say it would be OK for you to be the 'other' woman.
     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from JAR-VT. Show JAR-VT's posts

    Re: LL Advice for IP

    I guess I am not sure what you want out of this. I can see you being put off and hurt, however, if he had said he wanted to be more serious, what would you have said??

    For me, that's the crux. He played a dirty move on you--and how gross to be doing it while actually nuzzling you, for you and her, but do you want to be serious with him? If so, tell him. If not, drop him. He couldn't be your fun time forever and sounds like he doesn't know how to let go of that.

    Good luck!
     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from naturalginger. Show naturalginger's posts

    Re: LL Advice for IP

    I'm a little confused that you originally made it clear you didn't want anything serious, and then when you describe the restaurant interactions where you expect him to express a desire for more, it sounds welcome.

    I've been in similar situations, where the status quo goes on for too long without a conversation, and you're completely derailed when new realities crop up. Realities like "Oh PS, I have a girlfriend." .... Excuse me? You probably should have brought that up BEFORE we made out all night.

    It sounds as though you'd changed your mind about potentially wanting more from him - and I'd say it's unfortunate, but honestly I think you sidestepped a landmine with this one. He's willing to keep some side play in addition to 'dating' a new woman. Too many men out there that would LOVE you (monogamously) to put up with that kinda nonsense.

     
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    Re: LL Advice for IP

    So, he picked the Ethiopian restaurant? No silverware = no sharp objects at hand? Downside risk of proposing to keep you as a mistress = a facefull of njera?
     
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    Re: LL Advice for IP

    He just wants your Djibouti.

    :)
     
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    Re: LL Advice for IP

    In response to "Re: LL Advice for IP": [QUOTE]Single most confusing thread ever. What the hell? Was there some sort of secret meeting I missed? Posted by Sally-[/QUOTE] Seriously. Did you send away for some decoder ring or something?
     
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    Re: LL Advice for IP

    You would have had to have read the blog today, Sally. Sadly you were too busy with your fascinating life.
     
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