Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from TwoCentDonation. Show TwoCentDonation's posts

    Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?

    Hey Red!  It's nice to see you back again for a bit.

    And to DG's point, I learned back when same-sex marriage was legalized here to never ask a couple about getting married.  I was talking to a gay friend and I asked, "So, are you and Joe going to get married?"  My friend started by saying, "Ooh........... I don't know........." indicating relationship troubles.  I was thanking my lucky stars Joe wasn't around at that moment.  I made a mental note to NEVER ask a couple about their future plans.  I could ask one of the pair, but not both simultaneously.  Who wants a Cold War to break out in your presence?  I don't think the Koreans enjoyed it, so why would I?

    Maybe that's what we could do.  We could stage a Level 6 passive aggressive repressed hissy fit...
     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from TwoCentDonation. Show TwoCentDonation's posts

    Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?

    Smart aleck responses we could give:

    We're just in it for the sex.  Once we get bored we'll go our separate ways.

    We're wating for Gramps to die so we can afford a blow out wedding and honeymoon.

    We really want a poly marriage and have been looking for a third.  Interested?

    We're saving up for my sex change operation so our marriage can be recognized by every state in the union.  Oh, you didn't know I was transgendered?  My make up consultant did a terrific job teaching me.  And the electrolysis lady was the best!

    Mr. Cent's lost his detachable johnson, and we know a marriage can't be consummated until he finds it so we're waiting until then.

    But, if we get married, won't we end just like you?
     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from -Cariokie. Show -Cariokie's posts

    Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?

    TwoCent, I'd love to be around for a level 6 passive aggressive hissy fit with you and Mr TwoCent... probably fun to be a bystander!
     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from diamondgirl. Show diamondgirl's posts

    Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?

    People get so pissy when you don't want to talk about your personal life, too - the VERY SAME PEOPLE who say that they are afraid of evil things like Facebook because it puts your personal life on display have asked me why I am not pregnant yet!!!!

    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from TwoCentDonation. Show TwoCentDonation's posts

    Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?

    Smart alecky responses Diamond could give to nosy gits about her non-family way:

    I haven't really hit puberty yet.

    We're waiting for a testicular transplant, but there aren't enough organ donors who match Dr. Diamond.

    The bees are disappearing, so there aren't enough to work with the birds to make babies.

    I keep putting food in the bird feeder but the stork hasn't shown up yet.

    We haven't perfected the DNA formula for a perfect Boston sports fan yet.

    We don't have enough money, so Dr. Diamond has been cooking meth.  You'd think it'd be very profitable, but we keep having these mishaps that eat up the money, like taking out hits on the competition...

    We're really Cylons and we haven't figured out the reproduction thing.

    We've been trying to adopt internationally, but each time we get matched with a child Angelina Jolie or Madonna swoops and grabs the kid.

    Oh, but the combination of my beauty, wit, and charm plus Dr. Diamond's genius brain would be too much for a mere mortal to handle.  We're waiting for Zeus to take the form of gold dust and sprinkle himself on me.  Then at least the kid would be a half-god and able to handle it.

    It hurt too much the first time so we never did it again.

    Instead of ovaries I got a second pair of kidneys.  You know anyone who needs one?  Maybe I could trade a kidney for an ovary?

    The world's going to end in 2012 so why bother?

    I'm sterile from sitting too close to the TV and eating microwave popcorn.  Bite me.
     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from TwoCentDonation. Show TwoCentDonation's posts

    Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?

    Here's a blog idea I just got.  If I ever decide to get pregnant and blog about (yeah, right) I would name the blog Die, Bunny, DIE!!
     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from LWhitt58. Show LWhitt58's posts

    Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?

    In Response to Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?:
    [QUOTE]Here's a blog idea I just got.  If I ever decide to get pregnant and blog about (yeah, right) I would name the blog Die, Bunny, DIE!!
    Posted by TwoCentDonation[/QUOTE]

    I just read your various posts on this thread tonight, TCD, and I just LOST it when I read this one!  LOL 

    Your smart-aleck responses for you and Mr. Cent are superb, as are the ones for DG and Mr. Diamond are as well (especially like "We've been trying to adopt internationally, but each time we get matched with a child Angelina Jolie or Madonna swoops and grabs the kid.") but this blog title would be hysterical!

    My favorites from your responses:

    Mr. Cent's lost his detachable johnson, and we know a marriage can't be consummated until he finds it so we're waiting until then.

    But, if we get married, won't we end just like you?
     
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  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from diamondgirl. Show diamondgirl's posts

    Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?

    "The bees are disappearing, so there aren't enough to work with the birds to make babies."

    "We're waiting for Zeus to take the form of gold dust and sprinkle himself on me.  Then at least the kid would be a half-god and able to handle it."

    Twocent, I bow to your goddessness.  I nearly snarfed coffee.
     
  10. You have chosen to ignore posts from ItDoesntMatterWhatIThink. Show ItDoesntMatterWhatIThink's posts

    Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?

    In Response to Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?:
    [QUOTE]Here's a blog idea I just got.  If I ever decide to get pregnant and blog about (yeah, right) I would name the blog Die, Bunny, DIE!!
    Posted by TwoCentDonation[/QUOTE]

    I know you like to be a smart alec, so maybe a joke or two about not being able to sort out the prenup since Mr. Cent made all that money in the monkey trade...
     
  11. You have chosen to ignore posts from TwoCentDonation. Show TwoCentDonation's posts

    Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?

    Oooo... the prenup!  That would be the perfect segue into the Level 6 Passive Aggressive Hissy Fit!!
     
  12. You have chosen to ignore posts from wizen. Show wizen's posts

    Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?

    I always like the Stephen Wright (I think) method of keeping older relatives from saying "You're next!" at weddings.  He said they stopped doing it when he pulled the same trick at funerals. 

    I used to reply "if it ever happens you'll be the FIRST to know!"
     
  13. You have chosen to ignore posts from diamondgirl. Show diamondgirl's posts

    Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?

    I used to say 'Gosh, you know, that never occurred to us?'
     
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  15. You have chosen to ignore posts from 2ada63d622e89774a9fdcbc90527ab8e. Show 2ada63d622e89774a9fdcbc90527ab8e's posts

    Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?

    Hi-yah. Checking in from Down East.

    We chose not to have children. When asked, I said it just wasn't in the cards for us. No one ever questioned that. I would have liked to have some of the one-liners above about exploding eggs (or do they pop?) and so on but I'm just not that clever!

    About older relatives quizzing you about marriage: cohabitation of unmarried couples was actually illegal when I moved to Cambridge in 1967. It was illegal in many places. So...things have changed a lot. The relative is spouting a version of "when are you going to make an honest woman outta her?" This was a common saying that is no longer applicable in 2010, but she doesn't know that. The response that would work with my generation would be: "Well, we've talked things over and we are happy with the way we've arranged things." Period. If she brings it up again, then you, my dear Twosie, need to take her aside and tell her that you and Mr Two are happy with the way things are going and that she need not worry further about it. She may have a few questions but they are probably about your future welfare. I think she is kind of awkwardly trying to protect what she sees as your interests and that she'll stop if you tell her things are proceeding as you wish.

    TTFN
     
  16. You have chosen to ignore posts from dirtyminds. Show dirtyminds's posts

    Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?

    This isn't about marriage.. but in the same vein..

    Recently I was carrying in grocerys and a  man I've never met before asked where was my husband.   I replied politely with a smile.. no husband.   He looks at me with a question in his eye and says... no husband- boyfriend?... I again smile and say No boyfriend.  

    With sadness in his eye he sighs and replies... We are not meant to be on this earth alone young lady.

    Part of me was a bit dumbfounded. For all he knew.. I just went through a devasting break up and a comment like would push me over the edge.  Kind of like asking why someone is not married or a married person, why they don't have kids.  eh.. I don't know because I'm like barren.  It can be a very loaded question.   

    In a flutter of instant, my thoughts and feelings were all over the page. And then Ding.  My floor...serenity.    And I turned to him as I was leaving and with my evil little smirk I said... Who said I was alone?  and went off my merry.. single way.

      Even the most well intended people can be ignorant.  

    Oh.. just because I'm single doesn't make me a lesbian either.. thats my other favorite question.  Not that there is anything wrong with that!
     
  17. You have chosen to ignore posts from TwoCentDonation. Show TwoCentDonation's posts

    Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?

    Heh, dirtyminds, that reminds of when I was a demonstration supporting same-sex marriage.  I was standing next to a female friend, and an opponent of same-sex marriage walked by us and said, "What happens if you find a man?"

    Huh?

    Oh, right, that's because the only people on the planet who'd ever support same-sex marriage are the gays and lesbians.  No straight person would EVER support it!  And lesbians are lesbians because they just haven't found the right man.

    *rolls eyes*
     
  18. You have chosen to ignore posts from 2ada63d622e89774a9fdcbc90527ab8e. Show 2ada63d622e89774a9fdcbc90527ab8e's posts

    Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?

    Yup, I had to suffer through the whole lesbian thing, too, although, as you say, there's nothing wrong with that!

    The movie "Eat, Pray, Love" has some excellent scenes in which people make unaskedfor comments about having to have a man or be married. You are not alone.
     
  19. You have chosen to ignore posts from redwolf68. Show redwolf68's posts

    Re: Putting the kibosh on marriage talk?

    "We are not meant to be on this earth alone..."  Heh.  Really?  Sez who?  Plenty of people live their lives completely solitary (read: neither married nor cohabitating) and manage just fine.  During the months that I had my little one-bedroom apartment in Knoxville, TN, I came to the realisation that I could have lived the rest of my life quite single and solitary and been perfectly happy.  (By the same token, of course, I would not have had some of the wonderful adventures my wife and I have shared, so it's all relative...but still.)  I had friends and acquaintances I could hang out with, and even the occasional hook-up.  So it just bugs me that anyone would think you can't ever be happy by yourself.  That's as bad as assuming that you'll never have a happy marriage if you don't have kids as well.
     
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