Some Thoughts on The Blog

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    Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog

    I pretty much glossed over whatever the rooster was saying, and figured it was just some harmless goof. I have no idea what the rooster said to anyone, except that some of it ended "a doodle doo."  I'm still scratching my head as to what on earth was said that anyone would have even bothered with, much less taken seriously, or curled into the fetal position and cried over.
     
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    Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog

    disclosure:  I have no idea who the rooster was.  You'll have to take my word for that.

    I can understand why you wouldn't approve of that type of behavior CHC, because that's not your type of humor.  However, as a casual observer of that particular incident, what exactly crossed the line about it?  All he/she/it did was repeat the name of whichever poster was around at the time.  It was so absurd, in fact I thought to myself "if this is a sockpuppet meant specifically for insulting people, it's not a very good one."

    CHC, I get it that you see this as bullying.  I don't agree with it one bit,  as someone who knows first-hand what actual true physical and psychological bullying is like in the real world, but I respect the fact that you have an opinion and I'm not out to change that.  That said, your comment leads me to ask, where were you to stick up for daveh?  If you say nothing, are you not enabling?
     
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    Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog

    Full disclosure: I am McLaura McPetrie.
     
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    Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog

    CHC, if that is indeed the case, that moderators don't automatically remove offensive material until/unless somebody flags it, then I think that's a problem. I guess with a site as large as BDC with so many comments on so many stories, that maybe expecting mods to just look over everything is unreasonable...still I think the system is rife for abuse, especially in a community like this one. On the other hand, I do find that a little hard to believe, I mean I know some days it seems like stuff gets poofed so fast it's hard to believe that there was time for a user to report abuse.

    Regarding the rooster, I too glossed over the rooster finding it annoying, but I think it's fair to say that regulars here often gloss over behavior that would not be tolerated if were not for some cutesy packaging, and that's not okay. If you wouldn't tolerate it from any other lurker turned newbie, you shouldn't tolerate it from a regular or a sock puppet or whatever character somebody invents to thinly cloak their actions.
     
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    Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog

    In Response to Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog : What was horrifying about that day was the general approval for bullying behavior.  Who cares if he was entertaining - he was crossing lines that aren't tolerated in a healthy community.
    Posted by Corporate-Hippie-Chick[/QUOTE]

    Horrifying?  Please. 
    I watched the whole thing.  I like to argue with bullies, I like to defend people who can't defend themselves, and I like to generally be a decent guy.  But I didn't feel the need to step in.  It was only one guy attacking him, so there wasn't any piling on or anything.  As I remember it, the chicken took two pokes at DaveH - not nice, but it isn't like the bird had been stalking DaveH for days or anything.  And finally, this probably shouldn't be a factor, but I can't avoid it - DaveH was a whiner - he whined for attention many times.  So I have a hard time feeling bad for him when he got what he whined for, even if it wasn't nice. 
    I don't blame daveh for leaving; if you don't like getting poked and you're getting poked on a silly online forum, you should leave.  And what happened to him certainly wasn't nice.  But it was a lot closer to nice than it was to horrifying.
     
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    Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog

    In Response to Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog:
    [QUOTE]disclosure:  I have no idea who the rooster was.  You'll have to take my word for that. I can understand why you wouldn't approve of that type of behavior CHC, because that's not your type of humor.  However, as a casual observer of that particular incident, what exactly crossed the line about it?  All he/she/it did was repeat the name of whichever poster was around at the time.  It was so absurd, in fact I thought to myself "if this is a sockpuppet meant specifically for insulting people, it's not a very good one." CHC, I get it that you see this as bullying.  I don't agree with it one bit,  as someone who knows first-hand what actual true physical and psychological bullying is like in the real world, but I respect the fact that you have an opinion and I'm not out to change that.  That said, your comment leads me to ask, where were you to stick up for daveh?  If you say nothing, are you not enabling?
    Posted by Porkchop-[/QUOTE]
    I also do not know who the rooster was and like you I was a casual observer
    as i was lurking then and not posting. I disagree with you however that all he/she/it did was repeat the name of whoever was posting. The taunting was specifically directed at Daveh and was in my observation relentless. It also became sexual in nature and would not have been tolerated by any reasonable group of people in public. I don't know Daveh except for what i saw from his online posts but as a guy I can tell you that if someone had said those things to me in person they would have gotten clocked. It's easy to be insulting like that when you can hide behind an online blog.
     
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    Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog

    Ooooh steddie!
     
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    Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog

    I feel like a relationship blog with an author who invites adult commenters to share their experiences and insights should anticipate that sexuality will be discussed. Especially when that author selects letters with sexualized components like naked hot tub parties, one-night stands and the dreaded grilled cheese. Especially on the website of the newspaper that printed Beth Winship's "Sense About Sex" in the 1970s, for God's sake.
     
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    Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog

    In Response to Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog:
    [QUOTE]I think it's fair to say that regulars here often gloss over behavior that would not be tolerated if were not for some cutesy packaging, and that's not okay. If you wouldn't tolerate it from any other lurker turned newbie, you shouldn't tolerate it from a regular or a sock puppet or whatever character somebody invents to thinly cloak their actions.
    Posted by Butterflyz[/QUOTE]

    This isn't a very fair statement.  For all we know, it was some lurker-turned-newbie.  For all we know it was some old-timer-turned-lurker.  Nobody knows, nobody really cares.  The thing about sockpuppets is that people talk about them so much that it's so easy to just accuse anyone and everyone of being a sockpuppet.  New commenter going against the grain?  Sockpuppet.  Someone writing in to update as the LW?  Sockpuppet.  Porkchop being nice?  SOCKPUPPET!!!!!



     
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    Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog

    I also 100% agree with ED's comments about the age restrictions and what is out there for young people and I also agree that the onus is on the parents to be monitoring what their kids are watching. There are software programs out there that can be installed and monitor each keystroke on a computer both incoming and outgoing. It may seem like an invasion of their privacy but until they get to an acceptable age it is an effective tool to see what your kids are doing. A friend of mine used this to find out that her daughter was planning to go to a party that had both alcohol and drugs at it and was able to stop it from happening.
     
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    Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog

    I can tell you that if someone had said those things to me in person they would have gotten clocked.

    Can you remember some examples?

    Believe it or not, I've never said anything here that I wouldn't say face-to-face.  And I'm sure I've made comments that were more provactive than the rooster. And my face has not been bashed in at a dinner party yet.
     
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    Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog

    As for the 'cyber bullying is not real bullying' - it comes down to a core difference in beliefs.  

    Cyber-bullying is real bullying. The thing is, real cyber-bullying involves people with known identities (or at least one person with a known identity) with social consequences in real life.

    This is one reason why I advocate keeping online/real lives separate, and would never go to a LL meetup.  I can't even imagine feeling truly hurt or threatened by some clown I will never meet.
     
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    Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog

    Porkchop, I agree the sockpuppet speculation gets a bit tiring, but I think the reason for that is that people are trying to decide whether or not to be offended. If it's a regular just doing a schtick then it's cool, if it's a new troll, they must be taken down. Because of the real life component and the daily community, there's a sense that people "know" each other. Once again, estephre is a great example of this mentality.

    My point is, had the rooster whoever they were not used the cutesy packaging but rather just took cheap shots directly, he would probably would not have been seen as "entertaining."
     
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    Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog

    In Response to Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog:
    [QUOTE]I feel like a relationship blog with an author who invites adult commenters to share their experiences and insights should anticipate that sexuality will be discussed.[/QUOTE]

    I wish you could read the text of the hour-long 3-way that went on in here the day SSBM was fired, then hear your opinion. 

     
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    Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog

    In Response to Re: Some Thoughts on The Blog:
    [QUOTE] I don't know Daveh except for what i saw from his online posts but as a guy I can tell you that if someone had said those things to me in person they would have gotten clocked. It's easy to be insulting like that when you can hide behind an online blog.
    Posted by DryHumor[/QUOTE]

    Seriously?  'daveh adoodledoo' is insulting?  

    Look, I see where you're coming from here, nobody likes to feel insulted and honestly I'm not going to choose this hill to die upon, but assaulting someone if they come up to you and say "dryhumor adoodledooooo!" might be considered an overreaction.  Like Andy punching the wall because someone hid his cellphone (right McRob?)


     
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