OT - Vow renewal ceremonies and gifts?

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from IPWBride. Show IPWBride's posts

    OT - Vow renewal ceremonies and gifts?

    Sorry this is way off topic, but you all always have such great advice.  A cousin I havent seen in 20 years has invited me to his vow renewal ceremony.  They are going all out.  Ceremony and then full cocktails, seated dinner and dancing.  And I happen to know this venue is not cheap.  My Dad has begged me to go.  Normally I give cash for a wedding, but is that appropriate here?  They have been married 10 years (I think), have children and I guess do quite well.  I'm hesitant about writing a check.  But really at a loss about a gift, especially for someone I know so little about (I'm just not close with my Dad's family...for a whole host of reasons).  Google says vow renewal gifts are not mandatory, or can be small.  Thoughts??

  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from luvRIboy. Show luvRIboy's posts

    Re: OT - Vow renewal ceremonies and gifts?

    I would think doing something like a restaurant gift certificate for somewhere nicer, an "occasion" restaurant.  Having the GC, even if it would only cover part of the costs of a nice dinner, would inspire future date nights!  "May the celebrations continue..." 

  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from ALF72. Show ALF72's posts

    Re: OT - Vow renewal ceremonies and gifts?

    A vow renewal is no different than an anniversary party.  If you wouldn't give a gift for an anniversary, you shouldn't feel obliged to give a gift for a vow renewal.  The vow renewal is for the couple.  They chose to throw a party in a fancy place to follow the renewal; that's their prerogative.  It does not in turn obligate their guests to pretend it's a wedding and for the couple to expect gifts.  It's likely they don't even expect anything [now if there is a registry that is a different story!] If you want to give something,  a bottle of champagne and/or a card is sufficient. 

    FWIW, I threw my parents a 40 year anniversary party a few years ago- the only gifts they got were [and none were expected btw] were a couple bottles of champagne and some cards. 

  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from misslily. Show misslily's posts

    Re: OT - Vow renewal ceremonies and gifts?

    Gifts are totally optional for a "vow renewal". I agree with Alf - if you normally wouldn' send a gift for thsir anniversary, then no gift is necessary here.

    Swanky venue or not, gifts are not entrance fees for parties thrown by friends and family. You should always choose a gift based on your closeness to the recepient, not the price of dinner or cost of the band. Personally I would give a much better present to my brother or cousin even if they got married in the backyard and had a cookout than I would to a co-worker getting married at a fancy hotel.

    I'd take a card or at most a small gift like a bottle of champagne, nice red wine or even some yummy chocolates.