A parent nuts about peanuts

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from lindonderry. Show lindonderry's posts

    A parent nuts about peanuts

    So I need to vent on this forum.
    My 5 yr old daughter was at a dance rehearsal ( nut free building)while my wife and 2 yr old son where in the lobby area.  So my wife buys my son a granola bar in the vending machine.  As my son is walking around eating his snack another women in the same lobby takes it out of his hand, to read the ingredients, then hands it back to him.  She wanted to make sure there was no peanuts in it. 
     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: A parent nuts about peanuts

    Whatever happened to personal space and respect??? I can understand the fear, but, gosh.
     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from ALF72. Show ALF72's posts

    Re: A parent nuts about peanuts

    People are ridiculous.  You do not take food out of a child's hand unless that child is your own. I would have ripped that lady a new one. She probably scared the life out of the OP's kid.

    Too bad if there were peanuts in the food.  If your child is so allergic to something that he can't be in the same room w/ other kids eating it, then don't bring your kid out in public. I'm sorry, but parents should not have to withhold perfectly nutritious food from their own kids b/c there is an infinitesimal chance that some other kid could eat his lunch.  Why is this okay to do w/ peanuts, but not milk or wheat, which many kids are highly allergic to as well? I can understand not bringing actual peanuts into a school or wherever b/c it's easy to drop them and have an allergic child put them in his/her mouth, but when the peanuts or peanut butter is incorporated into other food?  Get a grip.   
     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from lindonderry. Show lindonderry's posts

    Re: A parent nuts about peanuts

    My wife told me this earlier this week and I went through the roof that someone did this to my kid.  I understand that kids are allergic to different things and some places have nut free areas.  This is not the first time my wife had a run-in with this women.  When my daughter had her first dance lesson my son walked in eating a Snicker's bar and the same women yelled at my wife saying that her son, also in the same room, is deathly allergic to peanuts and this building is a nut free. 

     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from ALF72. Show ALF72's posts

    Re: A parent nuts about peanuts

    If the building is nut free, then the vending machine would not have been selling anything w/ nuts and there was clearly no need for her to traumatize your child by ripping his food out of his hands.  If I were your wife, I would have torn that woman a new one.  I would also tell her that she would never touch my child again if she knew what was good for her.  Some people are just unbelievable. I hope your son is okay.  Your wife should at least lodge a complaint w/ the mangement of the dance place b/c that woman is a menace.  
     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from macnh1. Show macnh1's posts

    Re: A parent nuts about peanuts

    The manner in which the woman behaved is certainly unacceptable.  Nobody should be touching someone elses kid or their food, seek out their mom or dad or teacher etc. instead.

    HOWEVER!!!  My kid has a tree nut allergy...not as sensitive as a peanut allergy, they are different.  Tree nut/walnut allergies can be more fatal than peanuts but kids with peanut allergies can be unbelieveably sensitive.  The dust in the air, the smell, minimal contact with the oil from a surface could be a total disaster for some kids.

    Alergies to nuts and peanuts are different from milk or wheat etc... with the other allergies you feel sick and just not right....nut allergies can turn deadly in minutes.  Each reaction is worse than the last.

    That Mom carries two epi-pens everyhwere she goes.  If the kid is exposed, shows symptoms, she stabs him in the leg with the medicine and calls 911 asking for advanced life support.

    It's no joking matter when it's your kid.  Does that justify here behavior, absolutely not, yet I think people need to be more tolerant and understanding.
     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from ALF72. Show ALF72's posts

    Re: A parent nuts about peanuts

    I am tolerant and understanding. My best friend has a tree nut allergy and I've seen her go into anaphalactic shock. It's not pretty. 

    However, I do think that patrolling any environment in which your child goes on the off chance that another kid is eating something that may cause your child problems is ridiculous. That other mother was SO far out of line it's not funny.  If your child cannot walk about the world b/c nut oil in a room might cause him a problem, don't go out in public. Seriously.  I don't understand how such a child could walk into a grocery store if this is such a problem.  Teach your child not to take other kids' food or not to eat at other people's houses unless the parent knows about the allergy.  But to throw a fit b/c a child across the room is eating something that might or might not have nuts in it?! Please!  Just tell your child not to go near that kid. 
     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from veggirl. Show veggirl's posts

    Re: A parent nuts about peanuts

    [QUOTE]My wife told me this earlier this week and I went through the roof that someone did this to my kid.  I understand that kids are allergic to different things and some places have nut free areas.  This is not the first time my wife had a run-in with this women.  When my daughter had her first dance lesson my son walked in eating a Snicker's bar and the same women yelled at my wife saying that her son, also in the same room, is deathly allergic to peanuts and this building is a nut free.  [/QUOTE]

    This lady found your kid eating a peanut ridden snack in a nut free room once.   I'm guessing that didn't instill a lot of trust to this mom about your concern with nut free rooms (and clearly, this suspicion is right.)   Although she definitely went over the top by touching your child's food rather than asking your wife first, you should just consider yourself BLESSED you don't have a child who could die from what another child is eating.   Your kid was eating nuts in a nut free room - you were totally in the wrong there, and its incidents like this, which probably created this hypervigilance of the mom.   She crossed a line, but so did you.

    [QUOTE]If your child cannot walk about the world b/c nut oil in a room might cause him a problem, don't go out in public. [/QUOTE]
    I have never heard something so heartless in my entire life.    That's what nut-free areas are for.   

    A peanut allergy is a huge deal, but we try to make it more manageable with peanut free areas to protect families.   You prefer have a child suffer a lifetime of house arrest, rather than have dedicated safe places for them?   Its not like every place you go is peanut free.   The places that are - RESPECT IT.   

     
  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from ALF72. Show ALF72's posts

    Re: A parent nuts about peanuts

    If there is not a sign that says 'nut free zone' how the heck is the OP's wife at fault b/c her son came to the first dance class w/ a Snickers bar?  The granola bar that the woman ripped out of the kid's hand at a later date did not have peanuts in it [I'm just guessing b/c she handed it back to the kid].  Seriously, people with allergic kids need to take responsibility for their own kids ONLY and not try to control the behavior of everyone around them.  If the room or building is nut free [which I do think is a reasonable thing to do], prominent signs should be placed around the room.  Also, for a place that offers dance lessons to small kids, that information should be in the brochures/literature that the establishment hands out to all patrons.  I'm curious if the building is truly nut free or if the mom had just 'declared' it a nut free zone.  

    You cannot control the behavior of others or mold the world around you to your liking - this is true no matter what your age.  If you have allergies or if you have a child with allergies, you need to take responsibility of that yourself and not force the world to conform to the needs of your child.  A nut free building is a reasonable accommodation to allergic children of a young age, but a crazy mother on the loose is not.  If the child is not old enough or mature enough to tell people who might feed him "I'm allergic to X", or to know not to take food from other children or to pick food off the ground and put it in his mouth, then I'm sorry, the child should either be under the full supervision of a parent while he is in public or just not go out.  This is not 'house arrest' nor is it permanent. Once the child is old enough and mature enough to handle his allergy, I don't see an issue.  

    For what it's worth, I do have food allergies so I am not unsympathetic to people with food allergies.  If it's truly a nut free zone, put up some prominent signage. 
     
  10. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: A parent nuts about peanuts

    Who makes the world safe for that child to and from the safe zones?  Your car pulls in air from other cars.  I smell cigarette smoke all the time from the cars in front of me.  What if they're eating a Snickers bar? Peanut oil will be sucked into my ventilation system at some level.

    I think that's the point of the comment made about keeping the child inside.  No matter what you do, exposure to peanuts is all around us.  It's not heartless to note that it's impossible to prevent exposure unless you keep the kid inside.
     
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    Re: A parent nuts about peanuts

    [QUOTE]My wife told me this earlier this week and I went through the roof that someone did this to my kid.  I understand that kids are allergic to different things and some places have nut free areas.  This is not the first time my wife had a run-in with this women.  When my daughter had her first dance lesson my son walked in eating a Snicker's bar and the same women yelled at my wife saying that her son, also in the same room, is deathly allergic to peanuts and this building is a nut free. 
    Posted by lindonderry[/QUOTE]

    This is tricky. I agree--there should be prominent signage if an area is designated as a "peanut-free" zone or "nut-free" zone. When you don't live with a food allergy on a daily basis, it just isn't something you think about, except perhaps for packing your school child's lunch or snack. I still remember what life was like before peanut allergy was part of our life.

    I would be taken aback by someone grabbing food from my child's hand to inspect the label too. It would have been much more appropriate for the mother to speak to the other parent or if she didn't spot the other parent, to nicely explain to the child she needs to check the label before snatching it from the child.

    That said, it's somewhat difficult for us as readers to comment either way since we are hearing the story second-hand and don't really know all the details. I know it's not easy to avoid letting an unpleasant run-in color your view of things, but there are many food allergy families who handle their child's allergies with grace. Please don't let this experience affect the way you view all food allergic children (and their parents).
     
  12. You have chosen to ignore posts from pingo. Show pingo's posts

    Re: A parent nuts about peanuts

    I agree with everyone, that this woman was completely out of line. If she needed to know, she should have asked the boys mother to check. Besides this way she touched the bar, and suppose it did contain peanuts - she would then have transferred 'peanuts' to her own child. Really stupid.

    But I see another issue at hand her. Why was the two year old 'walking around' with a candy bar? IMO he should have been sat down while eating, with his mom watching. Mostly for his own sake (choking?), but also not to make a mess in whatever establishment they were.
    Finally - and I know I won't be popular for saying this and this is not in any way directed to the OP only - why feeding toddlers candy bars? A piece of fruit or maby some cheese and crackers would have been much better.
     
  13. You have chosen to ignore posts from lindonderry. Show lindonderry's posts

    Re: A parent nuts about peanuts

    Sorry I have to disagree with you, we never crossed the line.  As I said before this was the first time in this building so as my son was eating his snack walking inside the door of this building, again, for the first time, this women wigged out and said abruptly, "THIS IS A NUT FREE BUILDING, AND MY SON IS DEALTHY ALLERGIC TO NUTS!".  So unless there is a sign posted outside, which there is not, that says not nuts allowed, how are we supposed to know?

    [QUOTE]This lady found your kid eating a peanut ridden snack in a nut free room once.   I'm guessing that didn't instill a lot of trust to this mom about your concern with nut free rooms (and clearly, this suspicion is right.)   Although she definitely went over the top by touching your child's food rather than asking your wife first, you should just consider yourself BLESSED you don't have a child who could die from what another child is eating.   Your kid was eating nuts in a nut free room - you were totally in the wrong there, and its incidents like this, which probably created this hypervigilance of the mom.   She crossed a line, but so did you. I have never heard something so heartless in my entire life.    That's what nut-free areas are for.    A peanut allergy is a huge deal, but we try to make it more manageable with peanut free areas to protect families.   You prefer have a child suffer a lifetime of house arrest, rather than have dedicated safe places for them?   Its not like every place you go is peanut free.   The places that are - RESPECT IT.   
    Posted by veggirl[/QUOTE]
     
  14. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: A parent nuts about peanuts

    [QUOTE]Sorry I have to disagree with you, we never crossed the line.  As I said before this was the first time in this building so as my son was eating his snack walking inside the door of this building, again, for the first time, this women wigged out and said abruptly, "THIS IS A NUT FREE BUILDING, AND MY SON IS DEALTHY ALLERGIC TO NUTS!".  So unless there is a sign posted outside, which there is not, that says not nuts allowed, how are we supposed to know?
    Posted by lindonderry[/QUOTE]

    Of course, you didn't cross the line by being upset.  Even if the sign had been outside, it's not a hermetically sealed building.  People who have eaten a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch and haven't changed their clothes or washed their hands for a minute with hot water and soap will walk through there.  And, the granola bar was from a machine inside the building.  If she was so concerned she could have called out from down the hall about it to ask in a polite manner.  It was heartless for her to treat your child that way.
     
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  16. You have chosen to ignore posts from lindonderry. Show lindonderry's posts

    Re: A parent nuts about peanuts

    Thanks I'll mention that to my wife
     

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