Hi, I am a first time mom and am having a difficult time figuring out what is a good time or reasonable time to put my 3 year old daughter to bed for the night. Some people suggest 8pm but I see no point in doing that to her since she is currently not in daycare and I am unemployed. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Also she fights going to bed everynight.

 8:00 is fine, but I'd say even earlier than 8 for a 3yo...7:00-7:30.  I know it sounds early but it will be worth it in the long run. Children need a lot of sleep and sometimes putting them to bed later causes them to sleep less and causes sleeping problems. You also want to make sure your daughter is on a good sleep schedule b/f she starts preschool or kindergarten (i am a K teacher and always encourage parents to get their kids to bed early!)

Personally at this age I don't think bedtime matters as much as total hours of sleep.  It shouldn't really make a difference is she sleeps 9:00 pm - 9:00 am or 7:00 pm - 7:00 am...either way she would be getting 12 hrs.  There are other reasons for an early bedtime thoough...personal time for yourself or with your significant other, be ready for pre-K or kindergarten schedule when she starts up in a year or two, etc.  This article describes general sleep needs for various ages http://kidshealth.org/parent/general/sleep/sleep.html Toddlers typically need 11-13 hours total sleep per day, including naps.  As long as your daughter is meeting that, she should be fine.  My 2 yr old DS typically does 8:00 pm to 6:00 am with a 2+ hr nap so we usually end up around 12-13 hrs per day for sleep.

Whatever time you pick, keep it consistent.  Our 6 year old has her light out at ~8:30, the 3 year old is ~7:45.  They usually get up around 7 AM on their own.

The older one doesn't believe she actually needs to go to bed at that time, but she most certainly does.  When she's tired, she is argumentative, grumpy, sullen and generally doesn't want to go to bed.

Consistency is really the key.

Also, keep in mind that when you go back to work you'll need to re-establish some kind of bedtime, anyway.  Might as well start now and that will be one less thing to change when it happens.

Also, I like to have a couple of hours to watch TV, read a book, chat with my spouse, surf the Web, etc.

my 3 y/o goes to bed anywhere from 8:30 to 10 depending on whether she napped, what's going on and how tired DH and I are. 

Just like most everything to do with parenting there is no right or wrong, just what works best for your family.

Having a routine would probably help with going to bed.  I've also found giving a warning like 5 more minutes or after Blue's Clues it's bedtime helps.