April Infants & Toddlers

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from misslily. Show misslily's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    I have been making photo books at Shutterfly. Hopefully they will last longer than my baby book, which is falling apart.
    My friend who had the anuerysm died when her DD was only 18 months old. She was 36. One day she was here, and the next she was gone. It was the most horrible experience I've ever been through. It was even worse emotionally than my MC.
    DH and I are both older parents and I worry that I won't live long enough to see them grown up and settled with families of their own.
    Just have to keep taking my vitamins and hoping I live a long time. My dad is 84 and my mom is 79 so hopefully it's in the genes.
     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from IPWBride. Show IPWBride's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    Lily, I used to worry about being an older parent and not seeing a lot of the great moments in life, or not becomming a grandmother if my kid waits as long as I did, etc.  But I had to stop.  One, nothing we can do about it.  And two, just as you just showed, parents unfortunately can go anytime.  I have a friend who lost her dad when she was 10.  Other friends who lost parents early.  And a friend who is mid-40s with "older" parents in their late 70s who are active as ever.  So you just never know.  I know you do because it sounds like you enjoy every moment (even the ones we aren't enjoying...!!!), but gotta just live for every day, week, year, etc.

    BTW... I treat myself to a bagel and coffee from Dunks every Friday.  And my coffee is burned.  AHHHH.  Buzz kill!
     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from Trouble30. Show Trouble30's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    Sorry about the coffee IPW!   I hate when things like that happen!

    So funny, I was just talking to DH yesterday about whether or not we should try for more kids, and that has a lot to do with us being older.  I'll be 35 next month and DH has 10 yrs on me!  I feel like I want to have more so that DD and DS have a better support system if something should happen to us.  DH and I each only have one sibling and neither of us are close to them and even so our family is pretty small right now.  I am so torn, I mean 2 makes so much sense.  A regular car is fine, vacations are easier (less plane tix to buy, regular rental car, etc.. we love to travel).... but I always wished I had more siblings.  If we do go for more I think I want to start trying again soon so they aren't too far apart.  What to do, what to do?  Oh and DH wants 2 or 4... he thinks 3 is a recipe for disaster and that one would be left out if 2 team up.  OK, I'm babbling.

    Happy Friday!
     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from dz76. Show dz76's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    Trouble - As youngest of three by 6 years with Irish twin siblings, I get what your husband is saying but there is no guarantee that it wouldn't wind up 3 against one.  I may not have been close to them growing up, how could we be since until I was out of college we were always at different stages in life, but then my sister got married 3 months after me and had her son 10 days after me so we shared some of the bigger life experiences together.  She calls me every day on her way home from work. My brother and I are less close but I think that is a boy/girl thing.

    When we found out about the twins, I was worried it would be them against DD1.  Now I know that DD2 would rather be an only child never mind the fact that she is a twin.

    DH and I talk about having more (family thinks were crazy) but given the fact that we are much more likely to have twins, we probably won't and that makes me sad.  I love the twins but it's not the same as having a singleton newborn.  You don't enjoy it as much.  We didn't hold them nearly as much as DD1 because you just want a few minutes to yourself and soon enough someone else will want to be held.  The twins were probably 9-10 months old before I though having twins was fun and even now I think daily that everything I go to do would be easier with a 3.5 year old and one 18 month old instead of one 3.5 year old and TWO 18 month olds.
     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from luckinlife. Show luckinlife's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    Dz - just wanted to say that your honesty is so refreshing.  Can't imagine how hard it must be!!
     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from dz76. Show dz76's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    Thanks, LIL. 

    I try not to be negative about the twin thing here but in real life when people ask me how it was (and I know they aren't pregnant with twins since I'm not trying to be mean) I will honestly say I wouldn't wish a twin pregnancy or twin newborns on my worse enemy.  Of course, I usually add that I hated being pregnant with my oldest too.  I just hate being pregnant and I had pretty easy pregnancies. 

    I would not be able to handle things without an amazing father for my kids (although since he started his new job help with household chores has tanked) and our family.  I'm also on a anti depressant for the first time in my life due to how overwhelmed I was feeling by life which helps keep me level and I know I have it pretty easy, except for money issues.  And with DH's new job, I am a single parent on the weekend from 10am to 7pm.  Sorry for the whining!

    The other thing I don't usually mention other than saying I couldn't be a stay at home mom or I'd be short at least one kid some day, is that I don't love being a mom as much as I though I would.  I love my kids and I wouldn't change anything about my life really but I though it would come more naturally.  And I really though patience would come with motherhood.  At least I was hoping since pre-kids I had the patience of a gnat.  Everyday being a mom gets a bit easier but boy my oldest bears the brunt of things since she is always the one testing the limits.  With the twins they rarely do something I haven't seen before.  I guess that's why the oldest kid always tells there younger siblings that they paved the way.  Super honest moment at an end. :-)
     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from IPWBride. Show IPWBride's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    DZ, so appreciate your story.  I have a friend with exact same situation, just add about 1/2 year to all 3 kids.  She actually gets very vocal about how much she is not in love with her life.  She says she pangs for the days of her career and her only-child.  (she had to quit her job because she couldn't find care for 3 kids... granted they can afford for her not to work).  She knew the odds as they did IVF for TTC #2.  But, while she was giving me advice to also do IVF for my #2, she told me "you can always reduce if you get twins."  Eek.  Talk about honesty (and that coming from a very good Catholic!).  

    As much as I want #2 - I am really nervous about #2/#3.  DH gets anxiety just talking about it (he has twin nephews - who were #1/#2).  We know two moms very well who are about to have their 3rd... and they are calm, in control moms and families who do stuff and travel, etc.  So I don't think I'm so nervous about having 3 kids... just having two together.  And like you say, probably feeling guilty that one is always getting the shaft. (not to mention #1 saying "where the heck did my mom go?")


     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from IPWBride. Show IPWBride's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    Oh, and one other post about siblings.  You really have no idea how close 2, 3 or 10 will be.  Just an anecdote.  My dad is the oldest of 10.  Sounds like they were sorta close growing up... although it was just baby after baby after baby for him and probably a lot of babysitting.  Now... in their 60s, 50s and 40s, they all live in different states and when my dad had a stroke a few years ago, I think one came to visit.  If I asked him who his family consisted of, he'd say a daughter.  I also have a friend youngest of 5, and she specifically chose to have only one child because she really doesn't like any of her siblings.  Extreme cases I'm sure... but just an observation from someone who is clearly studying this right now as I ponder how far I want to go to have another. (and someone incredibly bored at work today!)
     
  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from tc95. Show tc95's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    Watching the news has definitely gotten harder since becoming a mother, now I find myself tearing up over missing children. Praying now that they find the little girl in Rockport.

    Could my 3-month old be teething already?  he is normally a very happy baby and he was a little off yesterday and one cheek was bright red. He's been chewing on his hands a lot but I wasn't sure if that was just because he recently figured out how to get his hands in his mouth consistently or if it was something more. 

    Also- I'll likely call the pediatrician about this but what age did people start using sunscreen on their babies? I try to keep DS covered but still worry about him burning when we're out enjoying this amazing weather. Thanks everyone!
     
  10. You have chosen to ignore posts from misslily. Show misslily's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    I'm so grateful for my twins because it was my only chance to have more than one child. But I totally agree with everything DZ said about raising twins. I didn't get to hug and cuddle them as much as I would have liked when they were infants. It was feed, settle, try and rest yourself for the next round. Mine are 2.9 now and I often think about how much easier it would be with one.I had them in Barnes & Noble yesterday and it was a sight. I had to put on their backpack leashes because I couldn't keep track of both at the same time. DD threw a tantrum when I said she could have books but no toys. DS kept trying to run away. It was exhausting and a little embarassing.
    They gave up their only nap this week, so I have no break all day long. I was hoping they'd sleep until preschool started in Sept. No such luck I guess.
    I have a "U" shaped kitchen and had been able to gate off all the cooking areas. DS started climbing the gate this week. I called a friend and asked her where she stowed her knives since I had noticed that she doesn't have a lot of childproofing for her 4 1/2 and 2 year olds. "Just in the block on the counter" she said. I'm just not sure that's going to work with my curious monkey/climber. What if he climbs the counter while I'm in the basement throwing in the laundry? My mother mentioned that line about "house proofing your kids" and I had to think that if they had been singletons I would have had much more time to "train" them about staying away from dangers. My son gets into everything, always has and would need constant supervision without babyproofing.
    Anyway - sorry for the rant - the lack of a nap time is having more of an effect on me than on them!

    TC95  - no sunscreen until 6 months old. Light clothing, a hat - and try to stay in the shady areas if possible. If you do go to the beach or something - get those "rash guard" swimsuits that have long sleeved shirts.
     
  11. You have chosen to ignore posts from medfordcc. Show medfordcc's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    I truly have to put the stories (e.g. Rockport) out of my mind.  Like consciously acknowledge and then clear the thoughts.  It's really difficult to do.

    Misslily, could any of your upper cabinets be locked?  Not sure if the push-down thingies would work as push up thingies, but if you have two handles together you could use that type of cabinet lock.  I have also recently seen magnetic ones that have a magnetic key to open them.  Not sure where you're supposed to put the magnetic key to childproof that!  :)
     
  12. You have chosen to ignore posts from misslily. Show misslily's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    Thanks med - my husband put a great lock on a lower cabinet that I can stow the knife block in. But what a hassle to open it every time I need a knife.
    He's climbed into the kitchen and onto the counter about 10 times just this hour. Nothing seems to stop him. I'm not sure what to do about it. Time outs have always been a joke that ends up with me screaming and them laughing.
    I just keep praying that if I take him out of there over and over, he'll finally get it.
    (sigh)
     
  13. You have chosen to ignore posts from dz76. Show dz76's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    It's all about the repetition but man what a pain in the neck!

    Lily - I'm glad I didn't offend a fellow MOM. 
     
  14. You have chosen to ignore posts from Trouble30. Show Trouble30's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    Miss Lily, Can you still put DD and DS in their room for "quiet time" and if they nap they nap and if they don't that's okay?  Or do they scream bloody murder?  I think that the only thing you can do about the knives is to store them as high up as possible as medford suggested.  Thank god my daughter is not a very good climber... yet!   

    I think having an 8 month old and an almost 2 year old is pretty tiring, but your posts remind me I have to thank my lucky stars they are not twins!  I got to pretty much hold each one of them for their first 12 weeks.  

    All good points about siblings too.  No way of knowing how they'll get along.  My mom is one of 5 and doesn't get along with her brothers and sisters, but I always though it was because she is the biggest PITA.  Haha... I still wish I had a couple of sisters though.  
     
  15. You have chosen to ignore posts from misslily. Show misslily's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    Trouble - the pedi suggested trying a quiet time, but it was so stressful I stopped after 5 days. No one slept at all, they wouldn't stay in bed and have a "rest". They jumped from bed to bed, ran around the room, threw toys over the gate, stripped the blankets and pillows off the beds. It was complete mayhem. They don't usually misbehave that badly so I decided to stop trying for rest time.
    Today while DS was climbing in and out of the kitchen I let DD have some "Curious Goerge" on the TV. She fell asleep on the sofa for about 30 minutes.
    And the upside is a much easier bedtime. Sound asleep - both of them at 7:30 instead of closer to 8:30 or even 9:00.
     
  16. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    lily, I was so sad to read of your friend's so untimely and shocking death.  It makes our "irrational" fears not so irrational...we never really know.  I've had peers die, too...it's surreal and terrible.
     
  17. You have chosen to ignore posts from misslily. Show misslily's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    Thanks Kar. It was really horrible. She was a lovely and beautiful woman and we all miss her so much.
     
  18. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    ...and you always will.  Time healing all wounds is a myth in my experience.  My first close friend died when I was 7 and he was 6.  I'd asked my mom before then how old you had to be to be considered an adult.  She didn't ask why I wanted to know and simply responded 18.  I privately calculated how many years it would be until Troy and I could get married...12 years to go.  When he died in a car accident later that year I sobbed so hard the neighbor almost called the police figuring something horrible had happened to my mom or something.  And, now, 33 years later, to tell the story here my eyes are welling up.  There have been others, but none like Troy.  

    Again, I'm so sorry and feel your pain.
     
  19. You have chosen to ignore posts from jennifyr78. Show jennifyr78's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    Kar, that is such a heartwrenching story.  We have a couple of friends who have passed at young ages (everywhere from 3 yrs old to mid-30's) and you never really get over it.  My dad passed away relatively young at 52, and while I was already an "adult" at 22, I still miss my daddy 12 years later. 

    As for sunscreen, the "rules" say not to use it until 6 months.  I asked my pedi and she concurred.  But, we went on vacation to Hawaii while DD was 3 months, and I brought some baby sunscreen just in case.  We tried to keep her in her rash guard bathing suit, used hats all the time, and tried to stick to the shade, but she wasn't protected 100%, and got a little sunburn on her shins.  For the rest of the vacation, I used the baby sunscreen on her legs and arms, but not her face or hands.  I used it sparingly and still tried to keep her covered where possible.

    Personally, I thought it was better to protect my LO's skin from the harmful rays of the sun than from the potentially harmful effects of an organic baby sunscreen applied too early.  We gave her a bath each night to wash off the sunscreen, chlorine, and salt from the ocean and pool.  So far, a month later, she is fine and had no reaction to the sunscreen.

    Here is an article about use of sunscreen on infants.  http://www.fisher-price.com/us/prepare/qanda.asp?c=bg_safe&qandaid=52588
     
  20. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    Thanks, Jenn.  I'm so sorry you lost your dad so young.  I'll be 44 when my husband is 52, and that's a mere 4 years from now...unthinkable.

    As for the sunscreens before 6 months, I agree, the earlier they get burned the more likely they are to get cancer later in life so I'd do everything possible to protect an infant from getting burned!  And, the physical ones I mentioned (titanium dioxide and zinc something) protect just as well as the chemical ones.  Plus, the hats I linked to with wide brims and SPF 50.  Did you see those from coolibar.com?  They also have SPF 50 coverups, shirts, pants, everything for the whole family!  I swear I don't work for coolibar, I just love their SPF clothing - it's reasonably priced, fashionable, effective, and sized for the whole fam.  They even have accessories like a parasol - those are hard to find these days.
     
  21. You have chosen to ignore posts from ml26202. Show ml26202's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    It's almost good to know you all think about the news and tragedies about as frequently as I do (too often). A girl I went to high school with died suddenly in February, leaving a four month old baby. I just can't conceive of it. I have this insane notion that nothing can possibly happen to me to separate me from DD. And then I am reminded that it can happen. 
     
  22. You have chosen to ignore posts from IPWBride. Show IPWBride's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    I have my happy boy back!  We had a great weekend and DS was so much fun.  He had a few tantrums, but he worked his way through them with me using some of the "Happiest Toddler..." techniques, but not giving in to his demands.  I can so handle a tantrum now and then, even every day, if he is happy other times.  It was the constant tantrum and 100% difficult behavior that was putting me over the edge.  We had dinner at my SILs last night and he sat at the table (on my lap) with everyone and using a real fork ate an entire meatball (my BIL makes them huge... I only had one).  And even though he doesn't like pasta, kept trying some penne (kept handing it to me after spitting it out... but heck, he was trying).

    Our only challenge right now is his complete disinterest in pants!  Its like trying to clothe an octopus.  But I've been using the tickle tactic.. get him giggling hysterically and then slide them on real fast :-)
     
  23. You have chosen to ignore posts from luvRIboy. Show luvRIboy's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    We are currently in teething hell at our house.  She's starting to work on the incisors - none have broken through yet - so fingers are in the mouth a lot, and was really loving gnawing on a pizza crust last night.  Nighttime is definitely the worst part, although the nighttime Advil last night really helped.  Went this AM to make sure no ear infection...thank goodness for that!  And she has her 18 month app't next week, so we'll be able to check again. 

    Hopefully after those are through we'll have a little break before we start the 2 year old molars!!! 
     
  24. You have chosen to ignore posts from ajuly09. Show ajuly09's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    I totally agree with seeing things differently after you have kids.  Ugh watching the news is killer.  I also cry at the drop of a hat, I am guessing it's still the bf hormones running through me.  

    So we managed to go 12 months without the stomach bug. Yesterday morning it was quite a scene at our house.  I am so glad DH was home, I don't know what I would have done alone.  I don't know how single parents do it.   I actually don't know now if it was a stomach bug. DS bascially cleared everything out of his system over the course of 10 minutes.  No more vomitting/diarrea after that. He was very unhappy the rest of the day but he was very dehydrated too so I am sure that was a factor.  I guess I will never know what he had... He ate his usual breakfast.    
       And then I just had a mini mom meltdown.   DS would not let me change him and p00p was literally everywhere, then as I went to go rinse it off (we do cloth) he started screaming because he was stuck under our bed. He is not even walking yet and gets himself in such trouble.  I can tell these toddler years are going to be tough! Though I guess no one ever said it would be easy. :) 
       
     
  25. You have chosen to ignore posts from luckinlife. Show luckinlife's posts

    Re: April Infants & Toddlers

    To those of you with video monitors -What the heck are they doing up there in the crib when they are talking????

    Half the time I leave DD in her crib standing and she has so much to say I can only imagine what she is doing.  She doesn't cry, just talks.  I read somewhere that they are talking through their day.  She is now 18 months.

    Luv - we went to pedi today too!  DD with fever for the past couple of days and I stayed home with her today - DH will tomorrow if needed so I wanted to make sure there was no ear infection.  She looked like a hot mess all afternoon with green junk out of her eyes (of course I had already been treating her for two days so likely just viral), constant watery nose and just looked pathetic.  She was in decent spirits when awake, though, and took an over 4 hour nap this morning!

    IPW - great news about the tantrums.  I have learned that I don't have a ton of patience for them.  We have been lucky, though, because to date she just says "no, no no" and sits down where she is.  She really doesn't cry.  I am sure that is coming. 
     
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