August Infants and Toddlers

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from Chiclet831. Show Chiclet831's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    Mo - I'm probably going to be picking your brain in a few months. We're hoping to try BLW with DS when he's ready. One of the little girls in DS's daycare was eating "peas and brown rice" from a jar today and it looked AWFUL!

     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from summerbride09. Show summerbride09's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    In response to Arcain's comment:

     

    I'm feeling a bit irked at my dad. He takes care of DS one day per week, and yesterday he brought me a copy of this piece with the part about only giving kids under 2 small pieces of soft food circled in bold marker. A few things:

    • DS is 17 mos and has a ton of teeth, including 1 yr molars and canines look like they're coming in.
    • We do sometimes give him larger pieces of sandwich, etc., to bite off because he is a difficult eater and it often interests him enough that he will actually eat. He knows exactly what to do, generally takes small bites, and has never once tried to swallow without chewing enough
    • My dad has always been super overprotective, from my birth right on through DS'

    My first question is, am I really putting DS in danger by letting him bite off pieces of some foods? It's an area where I've felt pretty confident that I know my kid and what he's capable of for some time, but now I'm worried, and I certainly don't want to mess around with choking.

    My second one is, how do I deal with this with my dad? I know he's overprotective and does not think we're bad parents. But he's forever asking just one too many questions if DS is sick or jumping in to spot him when he's running around or something as if he's inevitably going to hurt himself. I'll occasionally gently remind him that we know our kid and what we're doing, and my mom tells him off for it in a much more vociferous way. The article thing bothered me more, I think, because it's clear he was thinking about it after seeing me give DS a big piece of sandwich or something, and that he didn't just talk to me about it. Worth noting, my dad is also incredibly passive-aggressive. He is not going to change his overprotectiveness, so I'm half-inclined to just suck it up and nod rather than ask him to suppress what I know he's thinking.




    My mom is the same way in terms of passive-aggressiveness, and I agree with Kar that just about all you can do is try to change your internal reaction. Just assure him that you know what you're doing and wouldn't do anything to put your DS in harm's way. Aside from that, I don't know what else can be done that wouldn't make it worse.

    And for the record, my DD is 13 mo and has 4 bottom/3 top teeth, and I'm starting to let her take bites of bigger things. I've given her half a banana and watched her carefully as she took small bites. Same thing with crackers like Ritz, and baby mum-mums. It's not like you're handing him a sub sandwich and sending him on his way...as long as he's seated, it's not a high choking hazard food like something very crunchy or hard, and you're watching him very closely to "dig out" any too-big bites, if it works for you, then carry on.

     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from lissafro. Show lissafro's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    I feel like sometimes they handle a big chunk of something they can hold in their hands better than a medium-sized piece of something they might try to swallow whole (if that makes sense).

    But at least your dad, while obnoxiously passive-aggressive, will take good care of your kid while he's in charge.  It's not like he's leaving him alone in the tub with a pile of grapes and peanuts near an open electrical strip.

    I wouldn't push him too much to change the way he is feeding DS unless it seems like he's not getting enough food or something. However, if he starts to insult your care of, it might be time for a lesson on "googling does not equal knowing."

    On the subject of choking hazards, my 13 month old handed me an empty bowl today and when I looked down I realized she had 4 grapes and a grape stem shoved in her mouth--big sister hadn't finished her snack and little sister can reach the table top.

     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from June09. Show June09's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    My daughter is 18 months, 1 year molars and canines are in. I give her sandwhiches cut into quarters and I don't cut things like bananas up as small as I used to anymore. She chews everything very well. I think she is actually better off when I give her larger pieces because she will take bites. If I cut everything up really small, she shoves entire fistfulls into her mouth. I still cut up grapes, but not blueberries. We are always sitting right there when she is eating. My friend's son, on the other hand, chokes on everything. He just doesn't have the chewing thing down. You know your son and what he can handle. I would thank your dad for his concern and explain that guidelines are helpful but every child is different. And that you'll base your decisions on your son, not google. How will we know what they are capable of if we don't let them try?

     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    Lissa, your post reminded me of a great technique I've used with success with the PAs in my life, the "Repeated Phrase."  Think of a response ahead of time, much like you said, and practice it in the same emotionless (but pleasant) tone until you are saying it in your sleep the exact same way every time.  Something like, "Thank you for your loving concern; we have it under control."  Then, no matter what the meddling, passive aggressive parent says, say that and ONLY that without changing your tone, expression, volume, etc. until they figure out that's ALL you're going to say until they drop it.  Even if a different response might make more sense (they'll try to force you out of your response rut by asking a yes or no question - do not waiver, say your phrase even if it doesn't make sense, per se).  It usually doesn't take more than three repetitions the first time, two the second, and only once will do the trick the third.  After that, they'll probably reconsider using their passive aggressive tactics on you - they'll know they will not get the desired response of controlling you in any fashion.

    ETA: It works because a passive aggressive gets his power by getting you to become defensive and argue with him.  This technique is essentially giving them the silent treatment without the silent part, which would be equally passive aggressive.  I used it last on my BIL who calls everyone he knows incessently to gossip.  All I ever said was, "I'm not going to gossip," until he stopped calling.  I'm the ONLY person in his address book he skips.  He'd bait me in every way he could imagine, and all he got was that one flat sentence until he hung up so he doesn't bother trying anymore.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Discretion is the better part of valor.

     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from tc95. Show tc95's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    IPW, thanks for your response about splitting time daycare v. nanny or relative. I think the routine at daycare is really good for DS, I just wonder with 9 kids and 2 adults if he will have enough attention.

    So much for my intuition- our pedi had recommended a hearing test because DH wasn't talking yet (at 15 months, now 18). I thought he was fine as he understands so much of what I say but it turns out he does have an issue. They think it might just be fluid getting in the way as it's a middle ear- related hearing problem but next step will be an ENT specialist.  Anyone have a recommendation? The audiologist we saw is at Children's so would like to stick with them I think (though I'll ask our pedi for names too). Anyone have little ones that needed tubes? Feeling a little guilty that I didn't do something earlier.

     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    Tc, try not to beat yourself up; so much has to be a guess while they are pre-verbal.  You did do the right thing - why would you have done it sooner?  Some kids take longer to talk than others for no physical reason whatsoever.  It will get taken care of and he'll catch right up - he's a sponge at this age!

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Discretion is the better part of valor.
     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from Chiclet831. Show Chiclet831's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    Warning: Long rant ahead...

    So, DH and I go over to his mom's last night for dinner with his family (brother, sister, their spouses and our niece). We're barely through the door before his mother starts with the weight comments. Now, if you know me, you'll know that DS's weight is a sore subject that doesn't need to be harped on. He's skinny. We all know it. We're all trying to fix it. I don't mind genuine concern but telling me that you can count his ribs doesn't help anyone. Then, she said, "He's just a lazy nurser. He sits on the b**b without doing much." #1. I never want to be involved in a conversation with my MIL that has the word b**b in it, #2. She's never once seen him nurse so how would she even know that and #3. No he's not. Then she tells me that she's mentioned it to a few people and they've all used that same term, "lazy nurser". Great, and we're talking about this with people I don't even know? Lovely. I made the mistake of bringing a formula bottle for DS, even though 2/3 of the bottles he got yesterday were EBM and I nursed him twice. But she saw the formula and was like, "Are you still able to pump a little?" She's so condescending. My SIL asked me if I was able to visit DS at lunch, which bothered me because the whole point of putting DS in the day care he's in is so that I can visit/nurse him at lunch. So yeah, I haven't missed a day yet. The way they say it, it makes me feel like they're rooting for me to fail. THEN, I found out that she told DH last weekend that DS's development is being affected by his slow weight gain. Oh really? Because he just rolled over this week so if there's a milestone that you think he's missing, I'd love to hear it. DH told her that there's no evidence of stunted development and that the doctor is not concerned about that being an issue. The doctor's exact words were "He's skinny but he's not sickly." I flat out told DH that I'm not going to see his mother or sister until I either get an apology and they start supporting our feeding choices for DS or I'm done breastfeeding him. This whole weight situation and all the pumping sucks as it is and I'm not going to spend my time with people who can't support me. I'm not looking for a medal or anything, but I'm not going to stand to have my efforts cut down either. Over the last three weeks, MIL has told me that not every woman makes enough milk, no one expected me to keep breastfeeding after I went back to work, and now she's going to call my son a "lazy nurser" like that's some clinical term? She also wanted me to call early intervention because she's concerned about his muscle tone. Meanwhile, practically everyone has remarked at how well DS controls his head or how strong his grip and legs are. Yep, I'm done. DH, who stinks at confrontation btw, actually agreed with me. (This isn't the first issue I've had with his family but it's the first time that he hasn't even tried to stick up for them.) I told him that, if he wants me to see them, he needs to address it with his mother. He may bring it up the next time they talk. We'll see how that goes.

    Okay, rant over. Oof.

    I've been emailing a La Leche leader, who encouraged me to visit Baby Cafe this week and see if they can help fix our situation. DH is nervous because we know the bottle feeding is working (DS has gained 2 lbs in 3 weeks). Logically, he doesn't want to upset the apple cart, so to speak. I don't want to do anything to DS's detriment, but I feel strongly that I have to give us one more shot at correcting whatever the reason he's not drinking enough at each feeding before I resign myself to pumping. I figure that, if they can help, great and if not, I'm still going to have to pump. I'll at least know that I exhausted all of my options.

    Side note, up until DS was born, I always said that I would try breastfeeding but that I wasn't really committed to it and I'd probably quit if it got hard. I can't believe I'm actually fighting to keep it going. Motherhood has changed me... :-)

     
  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from summerbride09. Show summerbride09's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    In response to Chiclet831's comment:

    Warning: Long rant ahead...

    So, DH and I go over to his mom's last night for dinner with his family (brother, sister, their spouses and our niece). We're barely through the door before his mother starts with the weight comments. Now, if you know me, you'll know that DS's weight is a sore subject that doesn't need to be harped on. He's skinny. We all know it. We're all trying to fix it. I don't mind genuine concern but telling me that you can count his ribs doesn't help anyone. Then, she said, "He's just a lazy nurser. He sits on the b**b without doing much." #1. I never want to be involved in a conversation with my MIL that has the word b**b in it, #2. She's never once seen him nurse so how would she even know that and #3. No he's not. Then she tells me that she's mentioned it to a few people and they've all used that same term, "lazy nurser". Great, and we're talking about this with people I don't even know? Lovely. I made the mistake of bringing a formula bottle for DS, even though 2/3 of the bottles he got yesterday were EBM and I nursed him twice. But she saw the formula and was like, "Are you still able to pump a little?" She's so condescending. My SIL asked me if I was able to visit DS at lunch, which bothered me because the whole point of putting DS in the day care he's in is so that I can visit/nurse him at lunch. So yeah, I haven't missed a day yet. The way they say it, it makes me feel like they're rooting for me to fail. THEN, I found out that she told DH last weekend that DS's development is being affected by his slow weight gain. Oh really? Because he just rolled over this week so if there's a milestone that you think he's missing, I'd love to hear it. DH told her that there's no evidence of stunted development and that the doctor is not concerned about that being an issue. The doctor's exact words were "He's skinny but he's not sickly." I flat out told DH that I'm not going to see his mother or sister until I either get an apology and they start supporting our feeding choices for DS or I'm done breastfeeding him. This whole weight situation and all the pumping sucks as it is and I'm not going to spend my time with people who can't support me. I'm not looking for a medal or anything, but I'm not going to stand to have my efforts cut down either. Over the last three weeks, MIL has told me that not every woman makes enough milk, no one expected me to keep breastfeeding after I went back to work, and now she's going to call my son a "lazy nurser" like that's some clinical term? She also wanted me to call early intervention because she's concerned about his muscle tone. Meanwhile, practically everyone has remarked at how well DS controls his head or how strong his grip and legs are. Yep, I'm done. DH, who stinks at confrontation btw, actually agreed with me. (This isn't the first issue I've had with his family but it's the first time that he hasn't even tried to stick up for them.) I told him that, if he wants me to see them, he needs to address it with his mother. He may bring it up the next time they talk. We'll see how that goes.

    Okay, rant over. Oof.

    I've been emailing a La Leche leader, who encouraged me to visit Baby Cafe this week and see if they can help fix our situation. DH is nervous because we know the bottle feeding is working (DS has gained 2 lbs in 3 weeks). Logically, he doesn't want to upset the apple cart, so to speak. I don't want to do anything to DS's detriment, but I feel strongly that I have to give us one more shot at correcting whatever the reason he's not drinking enough at each feeding before I resign myself to pumping. I figure that, if they can help, great and if not, I'm still going to have to pump. I'll at least know that I exhausted all of my options.

    Side note, up until DS was born, I always said that I would try breastfeeding but that I wasn't really committed to it and I'd probably quit if it got hard. I can't believe I'm actually fighting to keep it going. Motherhood has changed me... :-)




    I'm sorry you have to deal with the nay-sayers, Chiclet...I know it's way easier said than done, but you have to try to let it roll off your back...it sounds like they're miserable people to be around and are far less than helpful. Let the haters hate- you're doing the best for your LO and are keeping on top of it along with your pedi. Who knows- he may grow up to be a BIG boy! lol

     
  10. You have chosen to ignore posts from KAM2007. Show KAM2007's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    Chicklet-how rude of them! Unfortunately the comments will always be there-if they are this rude/nasty now it won't necessarily get better as DS get's older. You'll have to do what Kar suggested for another post and have your standard response with no emotion "the doctor isn't worried, but we appreciate your concern." or "This is something we are working with the doctor on, thanks for your concern-please pass the peas." And people don't realize how any BF comment can be such a sensitive issue-even ones not intended to be rude/hurtful can be hard to hear. Going for another try/help with BF is great, I'm sure your DH doesn't want to add any more pressure on you.

    tc-no recommendation for the ENT-but even at 18 months I probably woudn't have pushed since it's still so young to have a large vocab-no guilt!

    AFM-DD is certainly a handful lately. she's getting over a tough virus that left her mouth covered in cold sores-it was so tough she screamed for 3 hours solid one night. Thankfully that has resoved, but she's gotten nasty with me at night, I will rock her to sleep and she normally snuggles and is fine. But this past week she's now going to bite me repeatedly, kick me, scratch and pinch me. I put her down immediately and leave the room, come back in 5-10 min and she's all snuggles for a few then attacks again. one night she was up doing this until 10pm! ugh. I know she's getting another molar, but I'm not sure how much longer I can take her attacking me. Tonight we are going to try an earlier bedtime and see if that helps. Wondering if she is just over tired. Anyone else go through this? 

     
  11. You have chosen to ignore posts from poppy609. Show poppy609's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    Lissa - "But at least your dad, while obnoxiously passive-aggressive, will take good care of your kid while he's in charge.  It's not like he's leaving him alone in the tub with a pile of grapes and peanuts near an open electrical strip." Awesome.

    Arcain - I agree that it can be VERY irksome to have a parental figure hand you a child-care article with things circled in BOLD. It can feel very judgmental. But, since he's not my dad, I found it very endearing that he is thinking about the safety of your DS so much that he's reading and printing out articles. That said, this article if taken too seriously might have people thinking you can't give "fruit/vegetables" to kids under 2! And maybe I'm being a dolt, but without having read the actual study I can't figure out what these "choking-related visits to the emergency room" are made up of. If the child is actually choking, you wouldn't have time to go to the emergency room, get seen, and get released (I wouldn't think). Are they going after a choking episode? Or perhaps to deal with a child complaining of something stuck in their throat? That confused me, but luckily I haven't personally experienced it so perhaps I'm just being a dummy about it.

    Chiclet - How frustrating. It's so hard when you spend so much time and energy thinking and worrying about something, then have people talk to you about it like they're the experts and are bestowing their knowledge upon you. Even if they are trying to be helpful, they don't understand that it can just make things feel worse for you. I hope things get better. How is the spitting up?

    As for us, DS turned one on Saturday! We had a great party, thank goodness the weather cleared up. Lots of friends and family playing in the backyard for hours. I was much more relaxed than at previous bday parties, even though I was barely dressed when the first guest arrived and had to frost the cupcakes/cake while chatting with a bunch of party guests in the kitchen. DS had a great time, as did all the guests (I hope), so that is the most important thing. Haven't opened a single gift yet, since everyone stayed until DS's bedtime and we had a family function on Sunday! Hopefully tonight.

     
  12. You have chosen to ignore posts from Chiclet831. Show Chiclet831's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    Thanks Ladies! I kind of knew what I was getting into with DH's family being so judgey, but who would think that someone *wanting* to breastfeed would be an issue? Oof.

    Poppy - it's sweet of you to ask about DS's spit up. He's doing much better. He has a few pretty big ones during the day, but much less frequent. Although, he did nail MIL as we were leaving yesterday. Of course, she reacted like she'd never seen spit up before! I told her she should be happy that it's the end of the day and she doesn't have to go into work wearing spit up like I did twice last week! 

     
  13. You have chosen to ignore posts from summerbride09. Show summerbride09's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    In response to KAM2007's comment:

    AFM-DD is certainly a handful lately. she's getting over a tough virus that left her mouth covered in cold sores-it was so tough she screamed for 3 hours solid one night. Thankfully that has resoved, but she's gotten nasty with me at night, I will rock her to sleep and she normally snuggles and is fine. But this past week she's now going to bite me repeatedly, kick me, scratch and pinch me. I put her down immediately and leave the room, come back in 5-10 min and she's all snuggles for a few then attacks again. one night she was up doing this until 10pm! ugh. I know she's getting another molar, but I'm not sure how much longer I can take her attacking me. Tonight we are going to try an earlier bedtime and see if that helps. Wondering if she is just over tired. Anyone else go through this? 



    I'm not sure how old your DD is, but mine is starting some similar behaviors at 13 months old. Not so much at bedtime, but just randomly when you ask her for a kiss or when you're playing with her, she'll be all nice and lovey one second, then whack you in the face, grab at glasses, and then immediately looks to see your reaction. It was hard not to laugh when she first started, but we're cracking down on the firm "no" and acting sad/telling her it hurts us when she does that. I assume it's just a testing limits thing, to see how far they can get and what is/isn't acceptable.

     
  14. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    For for future reference regarding cold sores, nothing works like tea tree oil.  Dilute it well with coconut oil so it doesn't burn, and both oils will clear them up essentially overnight.  No product marketed for cold sores even comes CLOSE to this remedy's effectiveness.  Also works on other skin infections.  For my own occasional cold sores I use 20% tea tree oil (concentration in the bottle) directly on it.  It burns a bit, but whereas Abreva says "4 days" this works in 12 hours.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Discretion is the better part of valor.
     
  15. You have chosen to ignore posts from KAM2007. Show KAM2007's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    Kar-will remember that. Maalox and benadryl mouth wash is what we used-people I know who get them often say the maalox works wonders.

    Summer-dd is a little older 23 mo-we didn't get to try an earlier bedtime last night-hopefully tonight! I actually debated putting her in the car and driving for a while until she feel asleep! She's a fiesty girl-but this is beyond her personality!

    Happy Birthday little Poppy!

     
  16. You have chosen to ignore posts from poppy609. Show poppy609's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    Thanks Kam!


    Chiclet, glad the spitting up is somewhat better. Hopefully it continues to be.

    I could use a little perspective. My MIL has a cottage in NH on a lake. She wants to take the kids (2.10 and 12 mo) up tomorrow morning and keep them all day and overnight. DH would go get them on Friday morning/afternoon. I am having anxiety about this. She has never had both kids by herself by water. DD is fine in the water with her floaties, however she is used to having someone available to play with her in the water. DS is not that crazy about being in any sort of floatation device (usually will scream), and even if he is in one, needs to be held constantly because he will go face-first in the water no matter what he is in.  He is pretty happy sitting on the shore splashing, but puts rocks and anything else he can get in his mouth, and also likes to crawl head first into the lake. He needs eyes, and usually hands, on him about 95% of the time. I am so nervous, imagining getting a horrible phone call. She is very good with the kids and I trust her in most situations, it's just that she has never done this.

    Do I let go and give my ok? Or do I go with my gut, which is in knots? I don't know if I'm being overprotective or practical. Two out of the three adults in the situation are fine with it. ,If I nix it, I am totally the bad guy. If I say ok, it might be totally fine. Or I might get a horrible phone call. It would be different if DS was 2 and DD was 4. He's just so little.

     
  17. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    I'd be too nervous to let anyone be alone with them in that particular environment.  All it takes is a back turned for a second around the water, and we all know the probability that a back will get turned now and again.  Two adults at the shore.  I'd be ok with her being alone with them in the house because it's easier to secure the 1 year old in a high chair or bouncy thing when she has to put her focus on the 2 yo...but around the water?  No way.

    ETA:  KAM has an excellent point - ask her if she intends to have them in the water.  If not, I'd be ok.  If so, could you ask her to change that plan?  Is she trustworthy to keep her word if she says she won't do it (don't ask her to not take them in the water if you don't trust her to keep her word or you'll be stuck)?

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Discretion is the better part of valor.

     
  18. You have chosen to ignore posts from KAM2007. Show KAM2007's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    Poppy-oooo tough call! I have to ask this: how many children did your MIL raise? She's probably more capable than you can accept (trust me I know-I don't leave my mother alone with DD-but she raised two kids herself! (but my mother has physical limitations now)). Could you ask how she plans to handle both kids-if she even attempts to go into the water? She may realize it's not worth the struggle so sand castles on the beach will be the plan! Or a drive a for ice cream. My initial reaction is to take her up on this offer! You and DH get to sleep! She gets to deal with the bedtime/night time wake ups. :) Your gut is in knots because you will miss them and worry-no matter what age or where they are going.

     
  19. You have chosen to ignore posts from ALF72. Show ALF72's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    My parents have a lake house. I LOVED going there as a kid and still love going there. I was there when I was the same age as your oldest.  I don't have kids, but I would okay the MIL taking your daughter, but not your son. It would be too distracting for someone not used to [recently] taking care of 2 small kids. The 12 month old is going to have too many emergencies (including diaper changes) which could take your MIL away from the lake side or that could otherwise be distracting. Start w/ the one child and then when your son is older, reassess whether grandma can take both. GL

     
  20. You have chosen to ignore posts from poppy609. Show poppy609's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    Thanks for the input so far. I should have specified: MIL takes care of both kids on her own, at my house, 2-3 times per week. She has had my DD overnight at her lake house a few times, and has has both kids at the lake without me, when other family is there. She has just never had both kids, on her own, up at the lake. They would DEFINITELY be going in the water. It's possible that DD will decide she doesn't want to go in or stay in once she realizes there really isn't anyone to play with her. When I am up there with them, I spend most of my time either at DS's side pulling rocks out of his hands before they can get to his mouth/keeping him from crawling directly into the lake OR with my daughter in the water while someone sits with DS on shore.

     
  21. You have chosen to ignore posts from IPWBride. Show IPWBride's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    Poppy... how physically able is your MIL?  If there were some kind of emergency, is she able-bodied enough to be quick about it to reach one of them?  My MIL takes my son and sometimes her two other (much older) grandchildren to the beach.  However, she knows her limitations and even the two 10 years olds (very good swimmers, on the swim team) are not allowed above their waists.  They moan and complain, but those are her rules based on her comfort level.  I'm guessing your MIL, who knows that two is much more a handful than one given her weekly care schedule, may also know her limitations, I hope.  If you do let them go, which sounds like you may get outvoted... just have an honest conversation.  "DD has swimming rules, which we are trying to teach her; she is not allowed above her waist and I'd really love your help trying to enforce this with her, and DS really prefers the shoreline." And try to get her into a conversation about so that you can hear her thoughts - she may also be thinking how fun and great it will be but she may have already put the squash on too much water play.  Good luck with the decision.

     
  22. You have chosen to ignore posts from Novembride. Show Novembride's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    Oooh, poppy.  Part of me wants to chime in to say let them go, but you'd be so worried you'd be miserable and not able to enjoy the free time.  Do you have a life jacket or something more than floaties for DD to wear in addition to the "not above the waist" rule that would give you a little more comfort?  I'm sure your MIL would be super-vigilent not wanting something awful to happen on her watch.  Do you think she'd stop and do something else if she realized it was too much to watch both of them?

     
  23. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    I think MIL would assume she could handle it until she realized she couldn't, and it's how and when she discovers that fact that is the question, one I'd avoid finding out the answer to.  I'd rather deal with an upset MIL and DH than the unthinkable alternative.

    ETA: In fact, I think her assumption that being the sole provider for two kids under 5 in the water (any depth is a drowning hazard not to mention choking for the one who puts rocks in his mouth) is a great idea shows her lack of good judgement in the first place with respect to what it takes to keep a constant eye on both of them at the same time.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Discretion is the better part of valor.

     
  24. You have chosen to ignore posts from pugslove. Show pugslove's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers


    Poppy - I agree with ALF.  Have MIL take your DD and leave DS at home.  This way you dont worry so much.  I like ALF said DS can go when he gets older. This is a great way for MIL and DD to spend some quality time together. 

     
  25. You have chosen to ignore posts from poppy609. Show poppy609's posts

    Re: August Infants and Toddlers

    Thanks for your thoughts! I will have to make my decision tonight as she will want to know first thing tomorrow morning... still not sure what I'm going to do.

     
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