Baby Blues

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from lemonmelon. Show lemonmelon's posts

    Re: Baby Blues

    YES! The spray from the flushed toilet can propel matter up to 20 feet. Not ours, though. We have a strict LID-DOWN policy.

    If you really want to freak yourself out, read The Secret Life of Germs. You'll be bringing piddle pads to the movie theatre after that.
     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: Baby Blues

    In Response to Re: Baby Blues:
    [QUOTE]Kar - I am not sure if you really read that (or just kidding with us) but you made me laugh out loud!  Thank you!
    Posted by luckinlife[/QUOTE]

    Sorry to cut your laugh short, but I'm not kidding.  :(   Let me see what page...hold on.

    ETA:  Lemon, just saw your movie bathroom solution - hilarious! 
     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: Baby Blues

    From page 114 of this month's Shape:

    "...Not only do [bachelors'] apartments contain 15 times more germs than a bachelorette's abode, 30% of their remote controls (and 70% of their coffee tables!) are contaminated with fecal bacteria, according to a University of Arizona study.  Before visiting your guy's place, pack an antibacterial sanitizer..."

    ETA:  I just deleted my brain f^rt 70% fun fact that I posted today (where was my mind?).  Anyway in the second one that I deleted I mentioned that everything in the bathroom has fecal matter on it (including toothbrushes) as per Myth Busters, and lemon responded to it, above.  I've really made a mess of things here by posting the same info twice, adding new, deleting...sorry!  Where is my head?
     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from ALF72. Show ALF72's posts

    Re: Baby Blues

    I read that article while waiting for my flight.  They have so much fecal matter on their coffee tables b/c bachelors are more likely to put their shod feet up on a coffee table than a married dude is.  I was very relieved to find out that it wasn't b/c they have such poor hygiene until they marry that they run around w/ hands covered in fecal matter [phew!], it's that they put their shoes on the table and tranfer it that way.  ;-)

    Yeah, I thought Mythbusters debunked the toilet spewing on your toothbrush myth?
     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from bostonslp. Show bostonslp's posts

    Re: Baby Blues

    gross about the fecal matter.  I have a strict lid down policy in our bathroom (although not everyone follows it 100% of the time and then I am freaked! - even though most other germ things don't bother me).  We also keep our toothbrushes in the cabinet so that they aren't exposed, just in case the seat is left up.  :) 

     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from lemonmelon. Show lemonmelon's posts

    Re: Baby Blues

    In Response to Re: Baby Blues:
    [QUOTE]Yeah, I thought Mythbusters debunked the toilet spewing on your toothbrush myth?
    Posted by ALF72[/QUOTE]

    God, I hope you're right.

    We're lid-down regardless. We had a cat who loved water and every time someone left the lid up he'd get into the toilet and throw water all over the place. It was nasty. So he trained us and our friends to shut the lid. It really only takes one incident of stumbling drunk into the bathroom and finding a cat in the toilet to change a lifetime of bad behavior.

    We're also a no-shoe household. That started one winter when our daughter was around 10 months old. One of our friends was sitting on the floor cross-legged and didn't notice that my daughter was licking the bottom of her shoe. I thought I was going the have a heart attack
     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from lemonmelon. Show lemonmelon's posts

    Re: Baby Blues

    In Response to Re: Baby Blues:
    [QUOTE] We also keep our toothbrushes in the cabinet so that they aren't exposed, just in case the seat is left up.  :) 
    Posted by bostonslp[/QUOTE]


    That's the crucial flaw in our plan. All we've really done is guarantee that if there is fecal matter on our toothbrushes it's from non-family members, which is so much grosser.
     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from lemonmelon. Show lemonmelon's posts

    Re: Baby Blues

    Ladies, your old lives may not return for a while, but the grind of parenting a baby does pass quickly. And remember that summer is almost here and that means COOKOUTS. You can bring the child and pass her around and have a beer while other people watch her. We attended our first cookout of the season tonight and it was great.
     
  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: Baby Blues

    Nope, truly sorry to say, it was confirmed on that episode that it was on everything in the bathroom.

    Cookouts are so great...yay for Spring/Summer!  
     
  10. You have chosen to ignore posts from RedFishBlueFish. Show RedFishBlueFish's posts

    Re: Baby Blues

    Right, but they also confirmed on the episode that it didn't matter what you did. The bacteria was everywhere, including the toothbrushes that were dampened with sterile water and kept well away from the bathroom. So it doesn't matter how clean you think you are. It's everywhere and, if you have a pet, forget it.
     
  11. You have chosen to ignore posts from lemonmelon. Show lemonmelon's posts

    Re: Baby Blues

    We're bathed in feces.
     
  12. You have chosen to ignore posts from poppy609. Show poppy609's posts

    Re: Baby Blues

    In Response to Re: Baby Blues:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Baby Blues : We're also a no-shoe household. That started one winter when our daughter was around 10 months old. One of our friends was sitting on the floor cross-legged and didn't notice that my daughter was licking the bottom of her shoe. I thought I was going the have a heart attack
    Posted by lemonmelon[/QUOTE]

    I'm sorry Lemon but this made me laugh out loud.  However, I, too, have been considering starting a no-shoe policy.  Has it worked well for you?  Do you have people who come over and refuse or are offended?
     
  13. You have chosen to ignore posts from lemonmelon. Show lemonmelon's posts

    Re: Baby Blues

    In Response to Re: Baby Blues:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Baby Blues : I'm sorry Lemon but this made me laugh out loud.  However, I, too, have been considering starting a no-shoe policy.  Has it worked well for you?  Do you have people who come over and refuse or are offended?
    Posted by poppy609[/QUOTE]

    I had huge reservations about the policy, but it's worked shockingly well. We've even had two giant no-shoe holiday parties and enjoyed 100% compliance and only one complaint (from someone who crashed the party! who 1. crashes a Christmas eve party, and 2. after crashing, complains about the household policies to the host? The balls on that woman). We instituted the no-shoe rule right before the first holiday party and included the warning in our initial invitation and subsequent email follow-ups, because we wanted to allow people to plan accordingly. We didn't care if they tore up our rugs or gouged our floors with high heels, we just didn't want them tracking butts and salt and mud all over the place with their mucky boots. Everyone was awesome -- they brought slippers or fancy shoes or decorative socks. And since we'd invited everyone we knew, the word was out that we were now a shoe-free zone, so we didn't have to ever tell anyone to remove their shoes again. People just kick them off when they enter the house.
     
  14. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: Baby Blues

    In Response to Re: Baby Blues:
    [QUOTE]Right, but they also confirmed on the episode that it didn't matter what you did. The bacteria was everywhere, including the toothbrushes that were dampened with sterile water and kept well away from the bathroom. So it doesn't matter how clean you think you are. It's everywhere and, if you have a pet, forget it.
    Posted by RedFishBlueFish[/QUOTE]

    Sure, I agree.  I'm not a germaphobe and didn't move my toothbrush or anything, I'm just sayin' it's everywhere.  And, we have a lab, too, so like you say, she might be clean for a dog, but that just means she's not as dirty as the dogs who like to roll in p00. 

    ETA:  Lemon, your party post reminded me of a Sex and the City episode where one of her famous designer shoes got stolen from a party.  Love your cat in the toilet story, too!
     
  15. You have chosen to ignore posts from canukgrl. Show canukgrl's posts

    Re: Baby Blues

    IPW,  it's not too late!!  You gotta trust DH, and as long as LO is not in danger let him do things his way!  It did not come easy for me, at all, but it is much better than micromanaging him!  Start now!!  DH doesn't always do things how I'd do it, but since I don't have to do it, I let him be!

    As for no shoes, in Canada, no one wears shoes inside.  I went to a holiday party when I first moved here (well, back then we called them Christmas parties).  I arrived a little late and didn't know many people, my friend's husband showed me in, and being a guy, didn't tell me what to do with my coat (or shoes...) so I found the hall closet and put my coat and shoes in.  When I found my friend, she was appalled that I had sock feet (and admittedly, by then they were wet and dirty)  Lesson learned.

    Anyway on a more practical note, I have included a note about no shoes on evites, especially since the kids have arrived, and in winter.  We spend so much time on the floor with them (and if we're having a party, I've just cleaned said floors!) I think most people understand.  In fact, I cleaned the floors on Sunday and gave DH and DD a lecture about coming in to use the bathroom withough taking their muddy shoes off!
     
  16. You have chosen to ignore posts from medfordcc. Show medfordcc's posts

    Re: Baby Blues

    IPW, it's not too late.  I know it's hard, but... do it.  It'll be good for all of you.
    I have actually recently taken to not answering some of my husband's questions about the baby.  He knows what to do.  He's only asking because I'm there, and I realized that if I don't answer he will do things his way and be very happy about it.
    (Obviously if there's something new or weird going on that he missed, I'll tell him that.)
     
  17. You have chosen to ignore posts from luckinlife. Show luckinlife's posts

    Re: Baby Blues

    IPW - because my DH watches  DD one day per week alone, I had to give up quickly on trying to micromanage this.  EVEN SO, I still find I feel more uneasy when DH watches DD.  This is NOT because I fear for her safety or anything like that but I still have a feeling of responsibility.  When she is at daycare I know that there is nothing for me to do.  I am not sure if this makes sense or not.   Anyway, I think the very best way for your husband to understand all that you do is to leave them alone together for awhile.  It will be so great for you to get away and good for them too.  The main reason that my husband stays home one day is that I was afraid that I would be uber-resentful working full time (I happen to be the major bread-winner as well), taking care of the majority of the house and being the parent who is always responsible.  Now, much of this is still the case but I know that I can leave anytime and DH will know exactly what to do.  I do not think twice about going out with the girls for dinner because he definitely does not view it as "babysitting".  He has a great understanding that caring for a child all day requires a very different type of energy than going to work.

    I also know because I am a recovering type A personality, that when we are both together I will have a tendency to take care of DD the most.  I think this would rob him a bit of his relationship with her.  I think we all know it is the little moments like the changing table that allow us to connect with our little ones.  So, he has this opportunity all to himself one day.

    Sorry this is so long but I am SO the type of person who would just do everything and this arrangement has definitely helped.
     
  18. You have chosen to ignore posts from lemonmelon. Show lemonmelon's posts

    Re: Baby Blues

    My husband works in a seasonal profession, so in the dark, cold months he's the one at home with our daughter most of the time. And I STILL micromanage him and question him and harass him. He's an amazing dad and I trust him completely. But I am a monster who thinks there is an exact correct way to do everything, and I can't keep my mouth shut. I'm fortunate in that my husband has prior baby experience (his brother is 7 years younger), and he's confident by nature, so he ignores about 60% of what I say and tells me off when I get too bossy. He doesn't let my helpful instruction make him feel any less confident in his ability to parent our daughter. But a less assured man would certainly feel kneecapped by such behavior and panic when faced with an entire day alone with a vulnerable, angry baby, particularly if mom had never given him the opportunity to find his own way of being a parent. And if a man's father was a traditional breadwinning disciplinarian type, he never would have learned the practical skills one needs to feed, change, and clothe a baby. Men are barraged with images of their own parental ineptitude every day. Has a year gone by without a heartwarming movie about a man rising above the limitations of his gender and managing somehow, with great effort, to keep a child alive for two straight hours? And we as women are influenced by those same images, and so we treat our men as somehow less able to take care of the children they love just as much as we do. I had no choice in the matter because I have to go to work and we can't afford to pay for a sitter when my husband isn't working. But I was amazed by what a natural my husband turned out to be, once he had to leap in and just handle things without me around. It's possible that he is, in many ways, a much better parent than me. But don't you dare ever tell him that.

    So I think you'd be amazed at just how well your husband will do if you empower him by telling him you trust him to make his own decisions, and then leave for the day. You can write down nap and feeding times, but that's it -- don't give him a scary list of dos and don'ts. Don't barrage him with information. If he has questions, answer them but don't elaborate. And give him a few days to ease into it -- the scariest day is the first! Because it's really important to physically care for your baby. I think that the most important, sweetest, and tenderest moments happen during the most miserable tasks -- the diaper changes, the nap soothing, the night wakings. I remember reading a psychological thingy that said that the more we do for someone, the more we love that person -- in other words, by taking care of your child, you grow to love her more.  By letting your husband take control of his role, you’re helping him love his child even more, and feel better about himself in the process.

    And if he makes a mistake, don’t say a word. Because we all make mistakes. Without mistakes there would be no memoirs.

     

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