Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/19/2011 9:18 PM EDT
- ew1971
- Posts: 2
- First: 3/14/2008
- Last: 9/19/2011
I am so furious; Medford you are correct.
Amhreins will be getting an email from me and no more business.
Pity, I stopped nursing 8 weeks ago, or I would organize a "nurse in".
Really people. Most mothers who nurse are discreet and most patrons would rather a quiet nursing baby than a crying one; most mothers try and feed a child at home, but sometimes they get hungry and nursing quiets them. It is only an issue because we make it so.
People support breastfeeding only as it suits them, and many only for a few months. If we normalize it, it will become normal.
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/19/2011 9:28 PM EDT
I am very uncomfortable when I am around someone who is breastfeeding - especially while I am eating. I tend to be antiseptic about bodily fluids whether it is sneezing, coughing, or breastfeeding. I am just not comfortable with any of it while I am eating.
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/19/2011 9:29 PM EDT
- BR88
- Posts: 10
- First: 3/13/2010
- Last: 9/19/2011
Massachusetts Law about Breastfeeding:
Mass. Gen. Laws Ann. ch. 111 § 221 (2008) allows a mother to breastfeed her child in any public place or establishment or place which is open to and accepts or solicits the patronage of the general public and where the mother and her child may otherwise lawfully be present. The law also specifies that the act of a mother breastfeeding her child shall not be considered lewd, indecent, immoral or unlawful conduct and provides for a civil action by a mother subjected to a violation of this law. (2008 Mass. Acts, Chap. 466, SB 2438)
Breasts are meant to feed babies.
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/19/2011 9:43 PM EDT
- lemonmelon
- Posts: 2236
- First: 7/31/2006
- Last: 2/22/2012
In Response to
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination:
I am very uncomfortable when I am around someone who is breastfeeding - especially while I am eating. I tend to be antiseptic about bodily fluids whether it is sneezing, coughing, or breastfeeding. I am just not comfortable with any of it while I am eating.
Posted by BernadetteAnne
Do I look all rancid and clotted? And I drink a lot of water, you know. I can swear to you, my boy, swear to you, that there's nothing wrong with my bodily fluids. Not a thing.
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/19/2011 9:47 PM EDT
- lemonmelon
- Posts: 2236
- First: 7/31/2006
- Last: 2/22/2012
In Response to
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination:
Take pre-measured powdered formula in the bottle and warm water in a small thermos. Mix when needed. Problem solved.
Posted by spinzgirl
Why use formula and a bottle when you can feed directly from the breast?
My daughter refused a bottle. Should I have never left the house when she was exclusively nursing?
I used a cover up from time to time at first but when I became more comfortable and adept at breastfeeding in public I stopped. I would not use a cover up if I had another baby. Every mom who breastfeeds in public normalizes it for others and shows new moms or moms-to-be that they can breastfeed their beautiful babies too.
And anyone who has a problem with it can go somewhere else.
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/19/2011 9:50 PM EDT
- lemonmelon
- Posts: 2236
- First: 7/31/2006
- Last: 2/22/2012
In Response to
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination:
I am very uncomfortable when I am around someone who is breastfeeding - especially while I am eating. I tend to be antiseptic about bodily fluids whether it is sneezing, coughing, or breastfeeding. I am just not comfortable with any of it while I am eating.
Posted by BernadetteAnne
were you totally bummed when Monk got cancelled?
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/19/2011 10:11 PM EDT
- jennifyr78
- Posts: 199
- First: 12/3/2010
- Last: 4/30/2012
There are so many ignorant and baseless comments on here I don't know where to begin.
Many people have said it better than me, but bottom line is that breastfeeding is a protected right in MA. Parents are not relegated to stay home or only choose fast food/chain restaurants.
You can add my family to the list of people who will no longer frequent Amrheins.
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/19/2011 10:18 PM EDT
- Kiwiguy
- Posts: 77
- First: 3/6/2010
- Last: 2/15/2012
I don't get the fear of seeing part of a bo0b when a woman breastfeeds. You see more boobage at the beach on any given summer day than you do from a woman breastfeeding.
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/19/2011 10:29 PM EDT
- mggio
- Posts: 5
- First: 7/24/2009
- Last: 9/19/2011
Babies don't belong in restaurants if there are cloth napkins and tablecloths out of respect for the other diners. I think that is a pretty good rule of thumb to follow. I don't know this restaurant so I'm not sure what its like. If it is Unos/Chilis/Friendlys/Fridays etc. it's ok, but anything fancier I don't think it is appropriate to bring an infant and likely the staff didn't feel that way either which is why you felt uncomfortable fromt he start. I'ts unfortunate that they made breastfeeding was made the central issue here. That was wrong of them. The management should have said something earlier if they had a problem with infants in their restaurant.
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/19/2011 11:32 PM EDT
- ladeeda2
- Posts: 44
- First: 3/27/2008
- Last: 6/11/2012
as a new mom, i find the restaurant's request totally upsetting. first, it is against the law and every business establishment and its employees should be aware of that. it is their responsibility after all to be educated about the laws that impact them. second, how the complaint was handled was improper restaurant hospitality. it is the complaining couple that should have been moved not the family... i even ran this past my restaurant owner husband to verify. shame on those running that restaurant. i've never been but it seems now that i'll never need to make the effort! so sorry you had to deal with that after trying your best to be discreet!
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/20/2011 1:37 AM EDT
Thanks for all the (mostly) supportive and thoughtful comments.
Some of the more ignorant posters said way more about themselves than I ever could.
And that 'no outside food' comment was pretty funny.
Just for the record, this was a Saturday afternoon not a busy Friday night. The restaurant was by no means packed.
And my average size stroller was folded up at the front of the restaurant the whole time. All I said was 'stroller' and it somehow turned in to my 'big ___....hummer4000....parked next to the table'.
My baby did not make a peep the entire time we were there, save for a few wimpers as he was waking up and looking for food. This wasn't a case of a screaming baby bothering the other patrons like a couple people have suggested.
Now that we know the law, and are aware of how many supportive people there are out there, we will have no reservations about breast feeding in public again nor will we move when asked.
And for the people that think it's disgusting or disturbing, all I can say is this - if it is too difficult for you to keep your eyes on the person across from you and not on my wife and my child, then you just need to start dining with more attractive people.
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/20/2011 5:56 AM EDT
- beastsgirl
- Posts: 351
- First: 5/2/2010
- Last: 1/11/2013
I completely agree with the breastfeding law. However lemonmelon, It's common decency to be desceet as most moms are. When you dont and not use a light coverup JUST to prove a point, well, thats obnoxious.bg
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/20/2011 6:54 AM EDT
Breast feeding doesn't bother me at all. I'd be more upset with a restaurant that forced a mother to nurse in a filthy restroom. I'm more upset over couples who bring their unruly, rude, screaming children to restaurants, and then allow them to throw temper tantrums, yell, throw things and run around like brats.
Unless they're screaming, infants are actually nice to see out and about in public.
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/20/2011 6:55 AM EDT
I have no problem w/ mothers breastfeeding especially if the yummy mummy has beatiful breasts! :)
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/20/2011 7:34 AM EDT
"In the middle of the meal the baby started crying. We tried bottle feeding but the milk wasn't reaching room temp as fast as we had hoped and he didn't seem to appreciate the cold milk. "
"My baby did not make a peep the entire time we were there, save for a few wimpers as he was waking up and looking for food. "
__________________
Quotes are excerpts from your postings.
You've contradicted yourself here.
Either the baby was crying or he wasn't. Since you originally said he was crying, why are you changing your story?
(Is there no portable gadget that can heat milk? You probably wouldn't feed him cold milk at home, why do you think he would take it if you were out?)
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/20/2011 7:39 AM EDT
- June09
- Posts: 40
- First: 10/15/2008
- Last: 6/29/2012
As a server in a restaurant with tables set with cloth napkins, white linens, wine glasses, and candles (we also have a kids menu, crayons, and high chairs) I am MUCH more comfortable waiting on a table where a mother is breastfeeding than one where the couple sits on the same side of the booth, fondles one another under their napkins and makes out all night long. Plus families are usually a pretty quick table turn, they don't linger there for hours. The restaurant should have asked the person that complained if they would like to move to another table. I wouldn't go back.
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/20/2011 7:39 AM EDT
- mommoacori
- Posts: 1
- First: 9/20/2011
- Last: 9/20/2011
I think this is a horrible sign of our times. I am a breastfeeding mother and I have breast fed all three of my children. I have never, " I am lucky" had someone tell me to stop breast feeding or to tell me to leave. That being said, I found this information regarding the legality of breast feeding in public in the state of Massachusetts at:
www.ncsl.org
"
Mass. Gen. Laws Ann. ch. 111 § 221 (2008) allows a mother to breastfeed her child in any public place or establishment or place which is open to and accepts or solicits the patronage of the general public and where the mother and her child may otherwise lawfully be present. The law also specifies that the act of a mother breastfeeding her child shall not be considered lewd, indecent, immoral or unlawful conduct and provides for a civil action by a mother subjected to a violation of this law. (2008 Mass. Acts, Chap. 466, SB 2438)"
As for the stroller, I try not to bring mine inside because it is a hassle for me.
Good luck!
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/20/2011 9:03 AM EDT
- antwerps
- Posts: 2
- First: 9/9/2011
- Last: 9/20/2011
I am appalled at the treatment you received at this restaurant and I am going to send them an email to let them know. I suggest others do the same.
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/20/2011 9:15 AM EDT
- sflynn
- Posts: 1
- First: 9/20/2011
- Last: 9/20/2011
Breastfeeding Discrimination....I work in the hospitality industry and the 2009 law you mention does not include a privately owned establishment. They establishment was in their right to ask you not to bring your stroller or breastfeed in the dining room especially since they made accommodations for you to go to a private place.
Sorry but just because you recently gave birth does not mean that others need to accommodate your new needs...hope this helps you make decisions in the future.
We often encourage takeout to customers with families.....:)
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/20/2011 9:21 AM EDT
- poppy609
- Posts: 2230
- First: 10/29/2009
- Last: 5/23/2013
I guess I was the only one who could not get onto boston.com yesterday! I missed out on quite the discussion!
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/20/2011 9:24 AM EDT
- srb3189
- Posts: 1
- First: 9/20/2011
- Last: 9/20/2011
Thats atrocious. Dont bring your kid out with you to eat. I for one am disgusted when women do that in public and I dont want to here squalling kids when I am out to eat.
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/20/2011 9:42 AM EDT
- jopis
- Posts: 10
- First: 9/20/2011
- Last: 9/20/2011
Wow... I can't believe this. I've eaten here a thousand times and considered it family friendly. Maybe I'm wrong. Another thing: I have to assume that this couple went out fairly early with a newborn. If that's the case, how can any patron get upset by the sights and sounds of children? If you go out to eat before 8 p.m., expect to see kids. Don't like it? Eat later or at a more refined type of establishment, not a steak tips-and-rice joint like Amrhein's.
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/20/2011 9:52 AM EDT
- Changecat
- Posts: 2
- First: 9/19/2011
- Last: 9/20/2011
sflynn - I think you're mistaken in your interpretation of the law: this comes directly from the text.
"Section 221. (a) A mother may breastfeed her child in any public place or establishment or place which is open to and accepts or solicits the patronage of the general public and where the mother and her child may otherwise lawfully be present."
In other words, unless the restaurant forbids children to come inside at all, the baby has a right to breastfeed there.
Check out the text yourself if you don't believe me.
http://www.malegislature.gov/Laws/GeneralLaws/PartI/TitleXVI/Chapter111/Section221
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/20/2011 9:59 AM EDT
- cas1362
- Posts: 3
- First: 11/6/2008
- Last: 9/20/2011
It is illegal to ask you to move. Please file a complaint against them with the city maybe fear if losing their license will smack them. Please write a letter and post this issue on the reviews of the restaraunt sites so we as parents can show our power and not give them our business. As a parent when my children were very small it was easy to take them out, I could feed them and they would sleep as they get older they need to have a sitter unless you are in a family restaraunt because it is not fair to the othrr diners or the wait staff for the children to be running around.
Another custmoer complaining does not give the restaraunt the right to break the law.
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination
posted at 9/20/2011 10:30 AM EDT
- jennifyr78
- Posts: 199
- First: 12/3/2010
- Last: 4/30/2012
In Response to
Re: Breastfeeding Discrimination:
sflynn - I think you're mistaken in your interpretation of the law: this comes directly from the text. "Section 221. (a) A mother may breastfeed her child in any public place or establishment or place which is open to and accepts or solicits the patronage of the general public and where the mother and her child may otherwise lawfully be present." In other words, unless the restaurant forbids children to come inside at all, the baby has a right to breastfeed there. Check out the text yourself if you don't believe me.
http://www.malegislature.gov/Laws/GeneralLaws/PartI/TitleXVI/Chapter111/Section221Posted by Changecat
Thank you Changecat, I was just about to point this out.
