Re: HELP - Separation Anxiety
posted at 11/28/2012 2:54 PM EST
I don't have much to add: I do know my teachers SWEAR that the toddlers get different when their mother is pregnant, even if it's only a few months along and we don't even know - like they have a 6th sense or something.
I bet it's also because of your vacation time together as a family - we had quite a few children having a hard drop off on Monday after Thanksgiving weekend.
Otherwise, just keep trucking and eventually it will stop. I'd say that crying for 2 hours is pretty extreme, and I know that's why you're concerned. I'm hoping next week will be better - I'd agree to have your husband do drop off this week at childcare if he can, because she might have an easier time separating from him and that will make her day better.
Also, I'd find 1 or 2 things that she does with "just Daddy" AND I'd also make some limits about how much she can 'boss' you both around about insisting on "only Mommy." So, for example, if Dad is going to do bedtime, bath, books with her and she insists, no, Mommy - do you give in? If Dad refills her cup or plate at dinner or snack, and she cries and only wants Mommy to do it - do you give in? And the list goes on.
While I do think parents need to be flexible, and a few of those instances aren't a problem, and when on vacation you do anything to keep the peace for the whole family, it also gives a 28 month old an incredible amoutn of power that she doesn't need to have over 2 adults. So choose wisely.
I think you and your husband want to talk about those things, and come up with the scenarios that are common and decide TOGETHER, right NOW, not when they are happening, what you will do. For example: it's fine around bedtime because she's so tired she can't deal anyway, but if it's about refilling a cup then you will insist. Etc.