October 2012 Pregnancy

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from medfordcc. Show medfordcc's posts

    October 2012 Pregnancy

    I will start the thread after Kar's reminder.  ;)

    Stefani, thanks for explaining.  That was really helpful!  And I do know what you mean about the 18 week check.  With DD, we told everyone we saw starting after 13 weeks, but I didn't send an e-mail to people we see less frequently, or go FBO (my little cousin says this means "facebook official") until after 18 weeks.  I am also cautious like that.

    I am 10 weeks now and have the big "initial" appointment today.  When I went before (when I had no idea how far along I was), she talked to me about the prenatal testing options, but frankly I didn't pay very good attention.  I do remember that since I just turned 35 I am now "advanced maternal age" and there is some sort of thing - probably the maternity one you described.  I think today I will try to take notes!

    I'm also going to ask about doulas, and start getting more serious about that.  The big midwife practice near me has info nights, but they're all on a night I can't go, so I don't know.

    Chiclet - did you research Melrose Wakefield?  That's not too far from me either.  You seem to be a better researcher than I am!

     

     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from memes98. Show memes98's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    Looks like 2 threads were started at once!!

    MissWolff - good luck today!  Give us an update after the ultrasound. I am also anxiously awaiting my next ultrasound, which is next Friday.  I am counting down the days!

    Medford - good luck at your appointment today too!  I am doing the early screening for down syndrome, etc. that combines an ultrasound between 11-13 weeks with two blood tests.  I did this with my first pregnancy as well and it gives you the odds of the baby having issues (I think it was 1 in 10,000 last time).

    Also, last night I was playing with my 2YO daughter on the couch and reading books, and she pressed down on my lower stomach a couple of times.  She was just her usual squirmy self and was using me as leverage to move around.  I immediately removed her hand each time, but it had me worried.  So, I called the doctor this morning and they said the baby is pretty well protected at this point (I am 11 weeks), so not to worry.  What do others do that have a toddler?  I suppose I should put a pillow over my stomach or something to give some extra protection, because she is not old enough to understand that she needs to be careful around my belly (especially because I don't look any different to her at this point).

     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from Chiclet831. Show Chiclet831's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    Good luck with everyone's appointments today!

    SAW - just to go back to what you were saying in the last thread. I was under the impression that if the doctor knew there was meconium, you would have to deliver within 24 hours. I didn't think they messed around with that. I guess that proves the need to really communicate with your provider. I'm sorry that happened to you. I'm sorry you didn't have a good experience with your doctor again yesterday. I've noticed a lot of hospitals seem to have only one practice option.

    Med - I didn't look into Melrose Wakefield. It's probably just outside my comfort range in terms of distance from home and/or work. My father is convinced that if we go to Beverly Hospital that I will be delivering the baby on 95. (Which you know is fine with me!) I tried to convince him that it's only a 30 minute drive, but he still thinks that's too long. He must have forgotten the 12+ hours my mother was in labor with me! I'm sure we'll have plenty of time!

     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from medfordcc. Show medfordcc's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    My bad, I must have been writing at the same time as MissWolff.  MissWolff, hoping to hear a good report from your doctor appointment!

    My appointment yesterday was good.  10 weeks.  Got to hear the heartbeat on doppler, which was great to have that reassurance.  Memes, that is the exact same screening I'm having (I paid attention this time!) - they did the finger stick yesterday and the u/s will be scheduled soon up at the hospital.  (And I got the lab order to go for the big initial draw, bleah.)  I talked some about the doula stuff, but I don't feel totally settled on this.  For one, I saw my nurse practitioner, whom I adore, but she doesn't actually attend deliveries, so I really need to wait until I have a visit with the OB to ask her the hard questions.

    Memes - I have the same problem with my DD.  I just try to anticipate and deflect, and keep saying "you can't lean on Mommy's belly.  you can lean on my leg." or whatever.  And then try not to stress about it but it's easier said than done - I definitely know where you're coming from.  I guess when we're playing on the floor I try to avoid "vulnerable" positions more than I used to.  But I have no real solution.

     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from cwagner13. Show cwagner13's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    SAW - I am sorry that even the second appt did not go well. And I thought too that meconium required immediate attention, so I am sorry to hear that was the cause for your LO's NICU stay. I hope you can find a good practice for this pregnancy.

    MissWolf - i hope your appt went well...

    Medford and Memes... The baby is well protected. DS was 14 months when I got pregnant (24 months at time of birth) and did not understand the whole baby in belly concept. I did not worry too much about his leaning or occasional jumping on me for the first half of my pregnancy since the baby is still very well protected but we did try to work on being gentle with Mommy's belly. He did get into patting my belly when it was a noticeable bump. Even in my last month, he would sometimes forget and run into my belly to hug me but it was not a problem. And when it is big, they find it hard to really use it for leverage anyway, the shape is awkward. The baby is pretty well cushioned in there even later in pregnancy and they can learn to be gentle. DH also became a buffer - he would head DS off when he was in full steam. I did have a few hard bumps where I was like "oof!" in the last few week of my pregnancy from impact from DS but he did learn over time that he needed to be careful. And I think once he could feel movements, he found he liked just rubbing my belly. You just have to patiently say "gentle with the belly" and keep moving away when they are too rough, and they will learn.

    It is a good time to be sure your DH is more involved with your current child. Like my DH became in charge of DS's bedtime long before birth of DD because I knew I would probably get tied up regularly with nursing, so DS does not get upset when suddenly his bedtime routine got changed with the baby's birth since we did not have to change it.

     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from jleighla7. Show jleighla7's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    Med -- Glad you hear your ultrasound went well. Sounds like you're just a few days ahead of me -when's your due date? Mine is May 3.

    MW -- I hope your appointment today was ok.

    I'm 10 weeks today and my next ultrasound is next week. Since I haven't had an u/s since 6w5d, I am nervous that something will be wrong. A friend of mine told me last week that she had a "missed miscarriage" at 10 weeks but didn't find out until her 12 week ultrasound, which has me feeling so sad for her, and also really scared. My symptoms started subsiding on Monday (so, 9w4d), so I am worried. Did you ladies find you started feeling better towards the end of the 1st tri? I apologize for sounding like a total pessimist, but I'm coming off of 2 recent early m/cs, so I think I have a touch of PTSD or something.

     

     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from medfordcc. Show medfordcc's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    JL - we are very close - mine is April 27.

    I will be thinking of you during the wait you have until your appointment.  It makes total sense that you would be worried given the history.  Is there anything different this time that might make you feel better?  And I understand how you feel about your friend, too.  I have a friend who just told me about almost the same thing, and I know that mix of sadness and your own fear.  Hang in there.

     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from MissWolff. Show MissWolff's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    Thank you everyone for your well wishes.  I was right to be concerned as there was only a 6 week embryo in a 9 week sac.  I am going to wait a week and see if my body will begin the process naturally and then evaluate my options if that doesn't happen.  I'm really in denial that this can be happening again.  It seems so unfair (previous m/c in early July @ 7 weeks).  I felt that something was wrong though, so not 100% surprised.

    GL to everyone else.

     
  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from memes98. Show memes98's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    JL - I have the same fears about a "missed miscarriage" and I don't even have a reason to have those fears.  I just tend to be a worrier, and like you, I am anxiously awaiting my next ultrasound to make sure everything is ok.  And, I am 11 weeks and my symptoms have started subsiding a bit lately.  So, I do think it is normal to start feeling better at the end of the first trimester. 

    That is so sad for your friend and med's friend too.  Do you know if they didn't have any symptoms of a miscarriage?  I kind of assumed that there would be some bleeding or cramping, but if that is not the case, it is that much more worrisome.

     

     

     
  10. You have chosen to ignore posts from memes98. Show memes98's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    MissWolff - I was posting at the same time as you.  I am so sorry to hear your news.  Thinking of you in this tough time.  :(

     
  11. You have chosen to ignore posts from jleighla7. Show jleighla7's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    Oh MW, I am so sorry to hear that. It's just so unfair. I hope you and your DH are doing ok (as ok as you can be during this terrible time).

    Memes -- I don't want to worry you, but my friend didn't have any symptoms of a m/c, so it was totally shocking for her.

    Med -- My two m/cs were very early on, 4 weeks and a few days and 5 weeks. This time, we've heard a the heartbeat, I've had pg symptoms, and I've been taking progesterone suppositories since the day I got the positive test, so all of that is somewhat reassuring.

     
  12. You have chosen to ignore posts from Chiclet831. Show Chiclet831's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    MW, I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you're able to recover okay.

    I sympathize with everyone's anxiety in these early weeks. I've been feeling almost too good these last several days and it's gotten me a little worried. This is where I wish I had a doctor and could hear the heartbeat so I would know that everything's okay in there. The RE told us we have less than a 5% chance of miscarrying at this point so hopefully we're okay. I'm trying to relax because there's nothing we can do about it if we were to lose the baby, but that's hard for a worrier/planner like myself.

     
  13. You have chosen to ignore posts from stefani2. Show stefani2's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    i'm sorry misswolff.  :(

    i hate the limbo phase.  it's torturous. 

    chiclet - i've never felt sick during a PG except for the one when i had a MC - so go figure.  everyone is different.  fingers crossed for you and everyone else (myself included, to be selfish!). 

     
  14. You have chosen to ignore posts from framerican51008. Show framerican51008's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    So sorry to hear about your loss, MissWolf.

    JL - When I was pregnant, I stopped feeling nauseous all day around 10-11 weeks.  Totally normal for symptoms to change throughout the pregnancy and for different people to experience different things.  Best wishes!!

    How many weeks are you Chiclet?  (If I try to go find out in last month's thread, I'll end up getting Help page not found!)

     
  15. You have chosen to ignore posts from Chiclet831. Show Chiclet831's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    Thanks for the reassurance! Fram, I'll be 11 weeks on Saturday, so I guess that's right around the time that things changed for you. I had heard that the nausea peaks round week 8. My worst day was the day before that and then I've been pretty decent since then. Of course, I probably jinxed myself because I'm not feeling so hot today, but it probably has to do with my working ridiculously long days and not getting enough rest. (Also? 11 weeks seems impossibly fast! Wasn't I just looking at my BFP yesterday!?!)

     
  16. You have chosen to ignore posts from medfordcc. Show medfordcc's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    MissWolff - I'm so sorry to hear that.  It does seem extremely unfair.  I'll be thinking of you.

    JL - I'll be thinking of you as well and sending well wishes.  I hope all those things you mentioned will help you feel reassured over the next week!

     
  17. You have chosen to ignore posts from amy-lynn. Show amy-lynn's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    I'm so sorry MissWolff. It totally sucks, I wish you and your DH all the best.

     

     
  18. You have chosen to ignore posts from siena09. Show siena09's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    I don't know what drew me to this thread today, because I haven't lurked on the pg thread in months.

    MissWolff--I'm sending you huge huge ((hugs)).  I'm so sorry.  

    I'm here if you want to talk about anything. (I've had a natural m/c, taken misoprostol, had a "mini D&C", and pursued repeated loss testing, so I've seen a few sides of this coin, though everyone's experience is different.) The bottom line is it is horrible any way about it, and I'm really sorry you have to go through it twice.  I hope your doc has called in a prescription painkiller for you, so that you can have that on hand in case you need it.  

     
  19. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    MW, so sorry you're going through this, again.  Best to you and dh as you work through your loss.

     
  20. You have chosen to ignore posts from MissWolff. Show MissWolff's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    Thank you everyone for your support. I'm not seeing any 'progress' so I may have to try the pills this weekend coming up.  Blah.

     
  21. You have chosen to ignore posts from MissWolff. Show MissWolff's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    Siena- Is there a way to privately convo on here?  I might have some questions if you are willing to chat.

     
  22. You have chosen to ignore posts from siena09. Show siena09's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    MissWolff--I'm sorry again for your loss.  I would be happy to talk.  (Well I'm not happy that we have this to talk about, but you know what I mean.) I don't know how to privately convo--I don't think this is a feature.  But if you are comfortable with email, you can reach me at *redacted* :p.  (This is a separate email account that isn't linked otherwise linked to my name/identity...)  

    Let me know when you've got the email jotted down and I'll edit it out of this message.  Also the first time that you email, please let me know the timestamp on your email with a quick message somewhere here, so that I can know it is you and not some random crazy person emailing me...

    If you're not comfortable with email and you have another idea for private messaging, let me know! I think it's a feature BDC is trying to add, but I don't think it's here yet.

    ETA: Okay, hopefully we can chat soon.  ((hugs))

     
  23. You have chosen to ignore posts from MissWolff. Show MissWolff's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    Thanks. Got it written down, you can delete/edit!

     
  24. You have chosen to ignore posts from Chiclet831. Show Chiclet831's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    Any second-timers (or people generally further along than I am) have advice about how to break the news at work?

    I work in a fairly large department, but there's only 4 people who do what I do. My boss is a guy my age but he's single and not very, um, sensitive. Not that he's mean or anything. I just think he'll be kind of indifferent to my actual pregnancy. I think he'll request to hire another full-time employee to cover my leave. (We've been talking about hiring someone next summer so I'm assuming he'll just move that up to cover for me.) The thing that I'm most worried about is that my late nights at the office are going to stop once the baby comes. (Our "plan" is to have the baby at the daycare next door to my office, so I'm not going to be able to just stick around until the work is done because I'll be responsible for the pickups.) We're not here late very often, but we have a few busy times a year where we get stuck past dinnertime. I am able to do almost my whole job from home so I see myself logging in after bedtime to get things finished. I just need to set the expectation that I'm leaving at 5, regardless of what's happening and if I have to catch up later, then I will. I just don't know how well that will be received by a person who doesn't have anyone to go home to and stays late all the time.

    I've been putting off telling people as long as possible because I don't want to hear anyone's labor horror stories and there's one guy who makes fun of people mercilessly and I know he's going to say some insensitive things. But I'm probably only have a few weeks left before the secret is out, whether I like it or not.

     
  25. You have chosen to ignore posts from medfordcc. Show medfordcc's posts

    Re: October 2012 Pregnancy

    Chiclet - I have to start with the caveat that I work in a very flexible setting now, although I did work in an office setting similar to what you describe previously.

    My advice is to first find out all the details about what your company offers for leave and what you plan to take.  Your boss might not know, so he'll have questions and then you'll be able to answer them.  (I think HR should be able to meet with you confidentially if you have any questions.)  Then request a meeting with your boss and just state the situation very simply and clearly.  ("I'm due with a baby on X date.  I plan to take leave of Y." et cetera).  I would then suggest a date down the road when you could meet again, at which time you would propose a plan for getting things ready for your leave and ensuring coverage during that time before you return.

    Personally, I would not mention the lack of late nights at this time.  If he asks, I would answer honestly and give the same facts you gave above.  If the busy times are truly restricted, you could offer to brainstorm solutions for those certain (fixed) weeks of the year.

    After that, you can probably tell people however you want.  Oh - and don't be afraid to walk away politely from labor horror stories or insensitive comments.  I have to say that people were really great about not telling me labor stories when I was pregnant.

     
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