February TTC

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from Tangerine5. Show Tangerine5's posts

    Re: February TTC

    Tomarra, I'm sending you and DH lots and lots of good luck wishes for your upcoming cycle. Very exciting - let us know how your baseline goes on Friday!

    WPP, I don't think it's acceptable that the doc told you to wait "a few more months." Is this your regular doctor, or just someone you were able to get an appointment with? Depending on how your insurance works, I would either ask him for a referral to an RE, get an appointment with a different GYN, or just make the RE appt yourself if you can. If you're interested, I'd be more than happy to tell you the name of my RE, who is fantastic (and a woman!).

    Chiclet, I've also heard that some GYNs deal with Clomid themselves. But that would make me nervous, since my understanding is that many GYNs don't have specific fertility training and don't know the ins and outs of fertility drugs the way an RE does. I know some GYNs just hand out a Clomid Rx and have patients go off and take the pills and see what happens - but REs are much more likely to monitor via ultrasounds and bloodwork to make sure that things are working the way they should and that you're not at risk for multiples. I'm sure there are fantastic GYNs out there who do all the necessary testing and monitoring, but in general it's just not their area of expertise. Despite how common it is, Clomid is a serious drug that can have unpleasant side effects, so I felt much more comfortable taking it under the care of a knowledgeable RE.
     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from Hibernian15. Show Hibernian15's posts

    Re: February TTC

    Thanks for the Resolve info, tomarra. My friend tried to point me toward their website for info, but it was a time when I was upset, and then I couldn't remember what it was called after. That was definitely it. Nice to know they have in person groups as well.
     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: February TTC

    Thanks for the FSH info, very helpful.  We aren't seeing an RE because DH is against all intervention of any sort and I'm not so hep on having a baby at my age, anyway, so I'm not pushing it.  It's convenient that he doesn't want to, frankly.  I'm honestly hoping for a high FSH since he's anti-birth control, too.  I would be happy if we were to have a healthy baby, but I decided the risk wasn't worth it post 40...and, here I am...40.
     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from MissWolff. Show MissWolff's posts

    Re: February TTC

    Bad AF! She is here as of last night.  Not really surprised however.

    Better luck to the rest of you and here's looking to March!
     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from Daisy75. Show Daisy75's posts

    Re: February TTC

    WPP--I've only scanned the last couple pages of this thread, but I would advise you to go to an RE ASAP.  I recently had a discussion with my gyn (who is male) regarding my PCOS diagnosis in relation to some other things that are going on.  He told me that women should have a period or otherwise shed their uterine lining at least every 90 days and that if that doesn't happen naturally or due to hormone withdrawal (e.g. bcp), then she should take Provera in order to "force" it.  Apparently there is sufficient evidence to suggest that allowing the lining to build and build and build indefinitely results in a higher incidence of uterine cancers, and, if allowed to build for a very long time, that there is a higher incidence of hemorhaging.  That was the first time I have ever heard either of those explanations.  I had always resisted taking provera "frivolously" in the past, but now that I know there's a reason, I'll be more likely to request it if needed. 

    In any case, if you're on CD72, and if you have a history of irregular periods, then you should go to an RE so that he/she can start delving into what the issue may be.  If it turns out you have PCOS or a thyroid problem, the RE will be able to diagnose that w/o much more than taking your medical history and a blood draw.  REs also have smaller windows of "normal" in regards to hormoes, so something that may register as "normal" with a PCP or gynecologist may be borderline or outside of normal for the RE.  If there is an underlying issue like PCOS, he/she will work with you to increase the chances of you getting pregnant.  Insurance should also cover fertility treatments/medications if you decide to go that route IF you have a diagnosis like PCOS even if you haven't been trying very long.

    From the time I first saw the RE to the time I was put on clomid (with various tests in between) was about 7 months.  So, it's not like you go and they give you clomid and you get pregnant and that's it.  There are things that need to happen in between and those can take a while b/c some tests need to happen within certain windows and if you don't get your period, you'll have to take provera and wait for that to work, etc.  I got pregnant with fraternal twins on my 3rd clomid cycle, and that was nearly a year after I went off of birth control.

    Seriously.  Don't wait.  It will feel good to hear the RE say "you're right, that's not normal...here's what I think we should do."
     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from siena09. Show siena09's posts

    Re: February TTC

    Sorry MissWolff--AF is a b!tch. Tomarra--I've got all my fingers crossed for your IVF cycle. I'm in the 2ww again. You all know how that goes...
     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from IPWBride. Show IPWBride's posts

    Re: February TTC

    So Sorry Wolff!  I'm pretty sure I will be right behind joining you in her misery.  

    Which in a way makes me feel even better about starting to see an RE.  This month I know for sure we BD'd about 4-5 hours after I O'd.  (and two days before).  So could not have gotten better timing.  So either our eggs or swimmers aren't at their best.

    Siena...good luck keeping busy next few months.  And Tomarra, please keep us posted on your cycle!  Good luck.  
     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from WhirledPeasPlease. Show WhirledPeasPlease's posts

    Re: February TTC

    Sorry for AF showing up, MissWolff. :( 

    Good luck in the 2ww, siena!

    jleigh, good luck at your appointment. Hopefully they'll do something for you quickly. 

    You've all persuaded me to look for another GYN/see if I can go directly to an RE. I'm not super tied to the GYN who told me to wait; my PCP just told me to make an appt with a GYN and he had the first open slot. I need to check out my insurance and see what I can do. It's kind of weird because DH works at a local university and the insurance is specific to that university and you have to see all of their affiliated doctors. The offices are kind of on their campus, too. (Cryptic, I know. I feel like I shouldn't name it, though!) I hate navigating insurance parameters. 
     
  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from WhirledPeasPlease. Show WhirledPeasPlease's posts

    Re: February TTC

    I checked my insurance's web site and it looks like I need a referral from a PCP for *everything.* I'm going to call endocrinology tomorrow anyway and see if I can get around that. I see lots of co-pays in my future. 
     
  10. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: February TTC

    IPW, you may actually have issues, and I'm glad you're on track with a great RE, but at the same time, the fact is that even with PERFECT timing and nothing wrong, per se, one might not get pregnant that "perfect" cycle.  It's far more mysterious a process than that in many ways even though there are some concrete things we can do to influence the outcome.

    MW, sorry about AF!

    GL siena as the days crawl by...

    WPP, best with the new GYN search.  I hate dealing with insurance...sigh.
     
  11. You have chosen to ignore posts from IPWBride. Show IPWBride's posts

    Re: February TTC

    WPP - hope you were able to get a new appointment.  Look forward to hearing their thoughts and next steps to bring about AF.

    So, in my 7 months of TTC #2, I've never been excited to see AF, but was on Saturday.  It was exactly 14 days post O, and a couple days early on CD26.  Which means I get to start a whole round of tests with the RE just a bit earlier.  So CD3 tests this morning were bloodwork (another FSH test) and ultrasound.  Got a nice 7am appt.  They say I'll get a call from a nurse this afternoon for "results."  Also to schedule day 10 u/s and HSG, hopefully both for next Monday.  

    Of course, at Costco this weekend I see a mom, dad and triplet toddler boys and got nervous... but cart WAY before horse.

    Hope everyone had a good wknd.  We are way overdue for a bfp on this board.
     
  12. You have chosen to ignore posts from MissWolff. Show MissWolff's posts

    Re: February TTC

    Hey IPW- Glad everything is moving forward with you.

    WWP- That is annoying, but hopefully you can find someone who will be more pro-active.
     
  13. You have chosen to ignore posts from Chiclet831. Show Chiclet831's posts

    Re: February TTC

    I hope everyone had a great weekend!

    IPW - Good luck with the testing! You sound so optimistic! Keep us posted on the results. 

    Siena - Good luck these two weeks! Sending baby dust your way!

    AFW, still waiting for the Provera to kick in. I'm getting pretty depressed about this whole process. The rational side of me knows that it's so early and that I'm in good hands and all of that. I get it. But the very emotional side of me is wondering if this is God's way of telling me that I'm not meant to be a parent. Which I think I could get over, but it breaks my heart for DH. I'm probably opening a can of worms here, but I also started to look into Catholic teachings on infertility and I'm pretty sure that going forward will be sinful (starting with DH's semen analysis today). I can analyze it from both sides (thanks 13 years of Catholic school!) but in the end, I'm still struggling with my feelings.

    On a lighter note, I saw a couple t-shirts online that made me laugh. My top 3:

    "Nope, still not pregnant, but thanks for reminding me."
    "Lucky me. Infertility AND your stupid comments."
    "If you don't want the truth, you shouldn't ask. 'When are you having kids?' 'When my ovaries start working.'" (I just like imaging people's faces if I actually let that one slip.)
     
  14. You have chosen to ignore posts from Hibernian15. Show Hibernian15's posts

    Re: February TTC

    I start my new job next Monday, so that removes one more obstacle on my path of ttc. I was a bit relieved to see AF this month, since I wasn't relishing the thought of doing job interviews with morning sickness. Good luck to everyone who has appointments this week. Fingers crossed for good things!
     
  15. You have chosen to ignore posts from IPWBride. Show IPWBride's posts

    Re: February TTC

    So much for a good mood.  I think I need to think about our family as complete.  I just got a call that my FSH went up... was 16 last month and now 21 this month.  And the antral follicle count is very low... 2 and 3.  This was from the nurse, so she's not going to say one way or another, but I know this is really bad news for my egg reserve and quality.  Probably not a candidate for much unless we use donor eggs.
    I'll go for the HSG next Monday just because, and I guess have DH do his SA, although it is so clearly obvious it is me.  But I think we're done.
    Wow, I keep saying I'm fine with an only child, fine with an only child... heck I am one.  But I'm really, really bummed.
     
  16. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: February TTC

    Chicklet, sorry you're having a hard time.  My DH is Catholic and I'm Protestant.  I understand the great power the Catholic Church exercises in telling people what's a sin and what isn't, but the theological fact is that only the Bible has that authority.  And, it defines sin as anything that comes between you and God.  Take what comfort you will from that; religion has it's place, but if your religion claims to be based on the infallibility of the Bible and yet defines "sins" as their own made up list...anyway, I guess what I'm saying is that from a religious perspective you might be "wrong," but from a purely God-centric/biblical perspective the Bible is completely silent on the subject.  You aren't going to stand before a priest when you die; you'll stand before Jesus.  Even more frankly, I think saying all infertility treatment is not God's will is akin to saying going to the doctor for anything is a sin (like Scientologists believe).  What's the difference between saying, "I have to accept God's will about not having kids and not do a THING available to me today to turn that tide," and "I have to accept that I'll die of cancer because chemotherapy isn't God's will?"  I see none from a biblical perspective.  So, will that make a Catholic couple feel better about doing what they want to do in the TTC area?  I have no idea, but I hope so.

    IPW, that's discouraging news, but who's to say what your FSH was when you conceived your first?  Maybe the numbers were exactly the same then as they are now.  Keep on keeping on and maybe you'll be surprised.
     
  17. You have chosen to ignore posts from ALF72. Show ALF72's posts

    Re: February TTC

    Kar, Catholicism is not Bible based. I know that sounds weird, but it's true. It is not Bible based like Protestant forms are.  Chicklet is correct that Catholic  doctrine does not accept fertiltity treatment b/c it is considered interfering w/ God's unique power of creation. It's one of the reasons I won't do fertilty treatment.  However, many priests have different takes on it and doing intial testing to determine fertility [such as a SA test] are not sinful b/c you are just testing [well, I guess it could be seen as 'sinful' but I'm guessing that your DH has no problem w/ doing what is necessary to get the sample, so to speak, so I wouldn't worry too much about it from that standpoint].  In any event, Chicklet, I undertand where you are coming from.  YOu will need to do your own reasearch on this and consult w/ whomever you think will help w/ that theological issue.  I will tell you that most doctors don't 'get it' so don't be surprised to get some incredibly insensitive comments on that topic.  Good luck w/ whatever you decide.
     
  18. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: February TTC

    Thanks, ALF.  That's what I've always "secretly" believed, and I don't think it's common knowledge even among Catholics that the Catholic Church isn't based on the Bible...or, if it is, it's very loosely based on it.  Most Catholics I know, including DH, thinks the Church faithfully teaches the Bible and only the Bible as its doctrine.

    I understand where Chicklet is coming from, too, but if she's a Catholic like DH who actually does take the Bible as the last word on whatever subject, she might take comfort in my Protestant soap box post. :)

    I have to admit, I've completely let DH assume it's a sin because that's what he was taught because I don't want to go through hoops to get pregnant.  But, believe me, if I did, we'd be having this Church v Bible discussion because I happen to know DH thinks everything he's been taught in Church is biblical.   And, if I wanted to do anything to have a baby he'd learn a whole bunch about what the Bible says (or, more specifically, doesn't say) about it.
     
  19. You have chosen to ignore posts from RedFishBlueFish. Show RedFishBlueFish's posts

    Re: February TTC

    In Response to Re: February TTC:
    Thanks, ALF.  That's what I've always "secretly" believed, and I don't think it's common knowledge even among Catholics that the Catholic Church isn't based on the Bible...or, if it is, it's very loosely based on it.  Most Catholics I know, including DH, thinks the Church faithfully teaches the Bible and only the Bible as its doctrine.Posted by kargiver


    I don't know how many Catholics you know, but I've never thought that. It's not what was taught to me in years of Catholic education. I always thought it was completely bizarre that people would talk about finding answers in the Bible until I learned about the Reformation. Then it made sense.

    Chiclet, ALF is right about the Catholic teachings on the subject. However, like many other things, it's up to you and your DH to determine how you feel about it, within your personal faith and relationship with God, if that makes sense. Good luck.
     
  20. You have chosen to ignore posts from ALF72. Show ALF72's posts

    Re: February TTC

    If you want to read futher on it, I'd suggest the author Grisez [or Grisez - I always mess up the spelling]. He's a bit annoying at times, but I had to read him in college.  His books will explain the difference between undergoing a treatment for something where fertility is implicated [or termination of pg, in his example], where abortion was an unintended side effect , versus where seeking an abortion for the purpose of terminating a pg was the purpose of the treatment.  It nicely encapsulates Catholic doctrine.  In any event, it's not something easily understood, or digested, but is something that will require some research and thought.  I wish Chicklet all the best in whatever decision she reaches. 
     
  21. You have chosen to ignore posts from siena09. Show siena09's posts

    Re: February TTC

    IPW--so sorry about the test update. :(  I don't know anything about the interpretation of those numbers, but I'll hold out hope that the doc has a rationally positive outlook.  If the nurse is not in a position to explain the interpretation of the tests results, I'm surprised that they had her call you with them.  I feel like that should be the doctor's responsibility in that case.  Not that it helps anything at this point--just expressing my frustration on your behalf.  

    Hiberian--good luck with the new job!

    Chiclet--those t-shirts are funny!  I don't think I can really help with the theological perspective, since I am not a religious person in that sense of the word anyway.  As for me, I can only say that this process has reinforced my own view that there is randomness in the universe.  At any rate, it would seem to me to be difficult to draw a bright line around what is and is not acceptable to improve the odds of a successful conception and pregnancy, if one accepts that some medical intervention into women's health and prenatal care is ethical.  

    I'm thinking of dozens of situations that to me seem more on a continuum than a black-and-white thing.  For example, hormonal or surgical therapy for endometriosis which can improve the chances of achieving future pregnancies for some women--this might occur well before a woman was even thinking of getting pregnant and could also provide symptomatic relief from associated pain.  Is it wrong because it also affects her future chances of conception?  Or treatment with progesterone for a luteal phase defect--this is thought to improve the odds of implantation and not conception itself. Is that an acceptible fertility intervention, given that other forms of prenatal care are generally accepted?  Are these examples really that ethically different from an intervention like clomid that increases the odds of ovulation directly?  Is manipulation of the hormonal process during the folicular phase (before ovulation) ethically distinct from manipulation of hormones during the luteal phase after conception has occured (so, in some sense, life has begun)? If not, then is supporting implantation ethically different than providing an intervention that might help a woman in her 2nd trimester carry to term?  I don't personally see big ethical distinctions between these interventions, although each acts at a slightly different step in the conception/pregnancy process.

    Frustrating moment of the week: two young children in my family started asking me a million questions out of the blue about my miscarriage last week, since it was the first time I had seen them in several months.  (why did your baby die? how big was it? did it fall out of you? and so on...)  I understand completely and fully that these are age appropriate questions and they didn't mean any harm or offense.  I did my best to provide them with the honest, age appropriate information that at this point I felt they deserved to hear.

    What makes me upset is that a close adult family member told these children that I was pregnant in my first trimester without consulting me or my husband first. I never would have said okay until much later in my pregnancy.  Given the fact that I am the one who had to deal with this barrage of questions and the emotional blow, I feel like I should have been allowed input and consideration in this.  Rant over.

     
  22. You have chosen to ignore posts from Tangerine5. Show Tangerine5's posts

    Re: February TTC

    Chiclet, I'm really sorry you're struggling. I had similar thoughts at the beginning of our TTC journey, though since I'm not particularly religious, they were more along the lines of "does this mean we're not meant to be parents? Does God not intend this for us?" Now - as I said, I'm not very religious, and I'm not Catholic, so take this for what you will. But in my mind, I can't imagine why God would not want a loving, devoted couple who badly want children to become parents and raise children in faith. When I think about the latest headlines (over 50% of births to women under 30 are out of wedlock, whatever insane percentage of pregnancies are unplanned, etc etc), I just have to think that God would want the couples who DO want children and ARE ready to provide for them and raise them well, etc, to become parents.

    This is just my feeling on the subject, and it probably doesn't help at all if you're looking to the specific doctrine to inform your decision. But I hope that Provera kicks in ASAP - and who knows, maybe that's all it'll take! I love the t-shirts, by the way. I wish I'd had that last one to wear to a few family gatherings ;)

    ETA - Siena, I read your post after posting mine, and I am SHOCKED on your behalf at that entire story. I cannot believe that adults would tell their kids about your pregnancy in your first trimester without your okay (were these people even supposed to know about it in the first place?). And that they apparently told the kids later on about the miscarriage without any qualifying information ("this is what happened; sometimes babies die before they can be born; it's very sad for Siena so let's not ask her about it," answer their questions while NOT in your presence, whatever). I am so sorry that happened to you, and if it were me, I'm not sure if I'd be able to stop myself from talking to the kids' parents. Totally inappropriate.
     
  23. You have chosen to ignore posts from ALF72. Show ALF72's posts

    Re: February TTC

    Prenatal care and fertility treatment are apples to oranges as far as Catholic doctrine is concerned.  This is something Chicket or any other practicting Catholic is going to need to research and explore, either on their own, or in consultaiton w/ a priest or some other individual. There are ample Catholic treatises on the subject of fertlity treatment which can help w/ this thought process and decision.  What interpretation you come to is between yourself and God, but there are plenty of books that explain the Catholic take on this.  It is not so much about the 'ethics' of certain treatments as it is about interfering w/ creation.  Prenatal care is not dealing w/ 'creation'. As far as the Church is concerned 'creation' already occurred at that point.  But again, there are ample treaties on the subject. Grisez is just one of many authors; he's the one that springs to mind b/c I know he dealt /w this issue.  GL.
     
  24. You have chosen to ignore posts from Chiclet831. Show Chiclet831's posts

    Re: February TTC

    Thanks for everyone's support.

    Siena, based on my interpretation of the Pope's writings in 1987, the Church only supports conception through intercourse. So any of the things you mentioned that could fix a primary or secondary fertility problem would be okay as long as the couple could then go on to have sex and conceive. Anything like IUI or IVF that involve conception through means other than sex are not supported. There are definite gray areas. Take the SA test - the Church would rather that we collect the sample in a condom during intercourse. But I would say that the Church doesn't support sex with a condom as a general rule, so aren't we trading one sin for another?

    Kar, if I was going with the Bible exclusively, I would say that there are plenty of examples where God has "opened the wombs" of barren women, so He must support couples conceiving "against the odds". 

    All of that said, if it comes to ART and we do choose to go that way, it's certainly not the only thing I'm going to have to answer for. Honestly, I wouldn't have even had the Church's teachings on my radar if the Vatican didn't tweet a statement on fertility this weekend. What are the chances?

    Siena, Tang is right about the kids in your family. That adult did you two disservices - telling the kids in the first place and then leaving their processing it up to you. I would keep the news about your next pregnancy away from them until the time comes. I wish I could give you a hug!

    IPW, I'm bummed about your update. Hopefully your doctor will have a better idea once he or she has the whole picture.


     
  25. You have chosen to ignore posts from ALF72. Show ALF72's posts

    Re: February TTC

    Sienna, I'd give those adults a piece of my mind.  If they were going to tell the kids, they should have explained it further and told tem not to ask you about it. I'd definitely give them the verbal equivalent of a dope slap. 
     
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