March 2011

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from itsallnew. Show itsallnew's posts

    Re: March 2011

    Thistle- Yay!!!!  I think that many women manage to find a boatload of things to freak themselves out about, regardless of whether they had any prior m/c or other experiences, so you are in the norm.  I'm so happy for you!

    Boston- Apparently I wasn't on my standard 29 days after the early m/c, but I tested the morning of CD30.  So, if you can handle waiting 3 more days, you're probably in good shape waiting what you think your normal cycle is.  If you are pg, then apparently they'll figure out how to date it eventually ;o)

    Tang- good luck for a clear u/s tomorrow!

    Good luck to all you ladies in the 2ww and those of you looking into adopting a LO!!
     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: March 2011

    Thistle, that's great news!!!!  Breathing a big sigh of relief with you.

    TC, et al, thanks, again, for the extra adoption/$$ info.  

    Boston, gl not testing! I'm 4 days out and thought my girls kinda hurt when I took my bra off, but, hey, I'm PMSing so who knows.  I considered testing...briefly.  Not gonna do it 'til the 14th, the day after AF is due, assuming my positive was CD11.  (I started testing on CD12 and saw the ramp down that day and a total BFN on CD13.)

    I will not test, I will not test....  ;)
     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from clc51510. Show clc51510's posts

    Re: March 2011

    I'm in my first month off of BC after 10 years and AF seems to be lasting forever. Did anyone else go through this when they went off BC? 

    I'm going on about a week and a half; however, the first 4 days were very light spotting.  I'm having trouble remembering exactly how long AF was prior to BC but I think it was around 7 - 9 days.
     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from luckinlife. Show luckinlife's posts

    Re: March 2011

    Thistle - that is great news!  I probably had 4 u/s by the time I was 7 weeks b/c of bleeding/spotting.  It certainly made the first trimester no fun.  Seeing a HB is such great news! 
     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from Novembride. Show Novembride's posts

    Re: March 2011

    Spring is certainly bringing new life around here! 

    Great u/s news thistle and allnew!   Sending good vibes to you for your u/s Tang.   Boston and Kar, positive thoughts to both of you for positive tests.

    Clc - sorry to hear about the extended AF visit, but I'm excited for you to be TTC!  I'm in my fourth cycle off BC after 5 years on and so far my periods have been shorter than when I was on BC.  I don't remember how long they were before BC, but they were longer b/c I remember wondering why I didn't go on sooner just to have shorter, lighter visits. 
     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from tc95. Show tc95's posts

    Re: March 2011

    Thistle, that's really great, sounds like things are progressing nicely.

    AFM, no miraculous jump with my beta, it went down so I'm definitely miscarrying. Even though I expected the news, I'm still disappointed and strangely really angry. I guess going into the donor process, I just heard it was our best chance for a baby- and I assumed it would all work out even if no one could guarantee it. One more round depending on whether the remaining embies survive the thaw but I'm going to gather all the adoption info I can in the meantime. It's just very discouraging.  Sorry to be such a downer- just struggling with the emotions a lot today. Hope everyone else is doing better!
     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from JACON. Show JACON's posts

    Re: March 2011

    Great news thistle and itsallnew!

    So sorry TC. :( And your feelings are totally understandable so don't apologize for anything.
     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from luckinlife. Show luckinlife's posts

    Re: March 2011

    Tc - I am so so sorry.  I think you have every right to be angry.  When you get so far into this process you forget that the majority of people just have sex to get pregnant.  How simple would that be!  It is unfair.  I think there is absolutely nothing fair about infertility.

    I can only imagine how you must be feeling b/c I know having walked in such a similar place that I would be just so upset and P*issed.  I am hoping that your little frozen ones make a go of it but I would be doing as you are a planning for the next step. 

    When I look at DD who, of course, is in no way biologically related to me I am so happy that I had to go through everything to get her.  If I didn't she wouldn't be here.  I was saying that to my sister who adopted her kids and she says the same thing.  She is so grateful she had to adopt b/c otherwise she would not have my lovely niece and nephew.   That when it comes down to it, and you have the child by whatever means - naturally, IUI,IVF,DE,or adoption - it is your child and you will never question this.  But really, does the process have to be so difficult for you???

    I did ask her about cost.  My niece was about 15,000 and my nephew about 20,000 which was 8 years ago.  She mentioned to me that it is in your best interest if you go through Abrazo to be very shall we say agreeable with the owner - she recalled a story where my bro-in-law crossed out some items in their contract and she was quite upset.  Also, my sister said that it is very important that you make it clear that you are 100% committed to adoption. 

    If you have any other questions I can always ask her.  She is more than happy to answer anything.

    I am thinking of you and sending hugs your way and I am so sorry!
     
  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: March 2011

    tc, so sorry to have the worst confirmed.  And, why wouldn't you be hurt and angry at the outcome?  I was just thinking that the girls I knew who were pregnant or had babies in my high school class actually have 20 - 21 year olds, now.  In fact, if they followed in their moms' footsteps, those girls are grandparents by now.  I don't begrudge anyone their little bundles of joy, but somehow that just doesn't seem fair.
     
  10. You have chosen to ignore posts from rhm327. Show rhm327's posts

    Re: March 2011

    tc, I am so sorry. As someone who is going through the same process, you know that DE isn't a 100% BFP, but you just have to believe it must work with the over 50% success rate and the amount of money you put into it. Be as angry, sad, frustrated as you want to be. You have every right. Hugs to you.
     
  11. You have chosen to ignore posts from thistleflower. Show thistleflower's posts

    Re: March 2011

    TC, I'm so sorry.  Of course you're angry--how could you not be?  I think it's healthy to start looking at adoption possibilities now so you know that you have a backup plan and will be a parent some way. 
     
  12. You have chosen to ignore posts from itsallnew. Show itsallnew's posts

    Re: March 2011

    TC, I'm so sorry.  I can't imagine what an emotional roller coaster you've been through and it's absolutely understandable that you're angry! I wish you the best and hope that you have the family you want no matter what. 
     
  13. You have chosen to ignore posts from tc95. Show tc95's posts

    Re: March 2011

    Thank you all so much, your kind words mean a lot to me. You're a wonderful and supportive group! 

    DH keeps saying it'll eventually work out for us. I'm trying to believe him (and mostly do) but it gets harder with each IVF failure- I'd really like to skip ahead to see how it turns out. You're right Lil, I'm sure we'll love a baby just the same no matter how/when he or she comes to us but this process has just been a real challenge so far. 

    Rym, I didn't realize you were also going the donor route. I wish you the best of luck. 

    Hmm, might be time to break out the wine chilling in the fridge- silver lining! Have a great weekend everyone!
     
  14. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: March 2011

    Mm, a crystal ball would be nice...
     
  15. You have chosen to ignore posts from luckinlife. Show luckinlife's posts

    Re: March 2011

    Totally Kar.  If someone had just told me I had to do donor from the begining so much time and emotions would have been saved!  I am sure the same is true for adoption.
     
  16. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: March 2011

    Wow, yeah, lil...for sure.

    Anybody testing?  I caved, but got a BFN.  No AF yet, either, and today's the day I expect her.  Usually, I'm peeing in a cup and, in the process, discover AF arrived.  And, as nuts as I am, I test anyway because my SIL told me (darn her for this!) that she got regular period-like bleeding the whole time she was pregnant with her twins.
     
  17. You have chosen to ignore posts from tomarra. Show tomarra's posts

    Re: March 2011

    I  didn't  test but she just arrived about 30 minutes ago...off to the RE tomorrow to get started on clomid.
     
  18. You have chosen to ignore posts from jennifyr78. Show jennifyr78's posts

    Re: March 2011

    Kar - that is interesting that your SIL had so much bleeding during her pregnancy.  AF arrived for me earlier this month, but then I had unexpected spotting on CD 9 & 10.  We're getting ready to BD again, but when I started spotting I thought - what if I am already pg?  I haven't tested, but now I'm wondering if I should?

    TC - I'm so sorry for your situation. 
     
  19. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: March 2011

    Sorry to hear that tomarra.

    jenn, go ahead and BD! Enjoy, what's the harm?!  (none, by the way, in case you're wondering)  Hoping that spotting was the real thing!!
     
  20. You have chosen to ignore posts from Tangerine5. Show Tangerine5's posts

    Re: March 2011

    tc, I'm so sorry to hear. I can only imagine the frustration. Hope you thoroughly enjoyed that glass(es) of wine this weekend :)

    Kar and jenn, fingers crossed! Here's hoping for a couple of St. Patty's BFPs!

    tomarra, keep us posted on your clomid journey...we can compare notes! AFM, I got my clear u/s last week, so today's my last day of clomid pills this cycle. I, for one, am hoping for an April Fool's Day BFP! (wait...that might make me nervous, actually...)
     
  21. You have chosen to ignore posts from bostongrl. Show bostongrl's posts

    Re: March 2011

    BFN for me.  I test Friday and Saturday... but AF was waiting for me Sunday morning.  This was the first month that it really hit me hard.  I was just so hopeful to start with.  Everyone kept saying that you're super fertile after a m/c, I had caught my O with the strips, and we totally had the timing right.  I had a difficult time dealing with the disappointment and there were some tears involved.  It didn't help that DH didn't seem as disappointed as I was (in fact he made a statement that our upcoming vacation would be more fun now).  Definitey NOT the response I was hoping for from him.  Then one of his friends let it slip on fb that she was expecting (now we are up to 4 close friends expecting sometime this year).  ARG.  Its been 6 months.  I keep telling myself that this is still a normal window of trying.  But the statistic that most couples are successful within 6 months keeps coming to mind.  DH tried to remind me we missed out on a month because he was away ... but it wasn't helping.  Last night I did have a heart-to-heart with DH.  I think him seeing me so upset about the BFN ... it finally sunk in for him how much I want a baby.  For him it is just the next stage of life.  Something that he probably wouldn't mind putting off for a bit to do more traveling.  For me... it is something that I've wanted for as long as I remember.  I've patiently waited until the time was right.  Finished grad school, found the right guy, got married, waited a bit so we could spend some time just as a couple.  Now I'm ready.  Actually, I was ready a year ago. but I compromised with DH to wait a bit longer and do a little more traveling.   I just want it to be my turn. 

    Sorry for the long post.  It's all I've been able to think about for the past 24 hours.  I'm trying to take it in stride... but for some reason it is really hard this month. 


    Jenn... i would definitely test again.  I don't think it is normal to spot between AFs when you are not on bcp... so I would take it as a promising sign you are pg :o) Anways... that is what happened to me in January.  I got spotting 1 week after I thought I got AF.  That BFP formed before the pee had even soaked up to the control line.  Unfortunately it ended in a mc for me... but best of luck for you!!

     
  22. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: March 2011

    Sorry you're having such a hard time.  

    Your DH might be more disappointed than you think.  Men deal differently with disappointment.  Try not to read too much into his "more fun vacation" sentiment.  If he's anything like my DH, he thinks he's helping, cheering you up, believe it or not.  My husband told me that he thinks acknowledging sad feelings will just make me feel worse.  I've since explained how that's entirely a man-myth.  But, if they don't know that they say dumb "positive" things they honestly believe will take your mind off the hurt and disappointment.  And, in the process add hurt to our hearts AND make us think they themselves don't care as much.  Whoops.
     
  23. You have chosen to ignore posts from Novembride. Show Novembride's posts

    Re: March 2011

    I'm sorry to hear you are so sad boston.  I absolutely relate.  That's how I felt last month when I thought I really had a chance.  We had the right timing, I was 2 days late, I was queasy, and I was more disappointed than I thought I would be when it didn't work out.   I hope your pain eases as the day goes on.

    Jenn - fingers crossed

    kar - seriously darn your sil for telling you that.  I have thought once or twice about taking the second test I have at home b/c of her.  How about you.  Still no AF i hope.

     
  24. You have chosen to ignore posts from Tangerine5. Show Tangerine5's posts

    Re: March 2011

    bostongrl, I totally feel for you. I'm so sorry about AF showing up and spoiling your weekend. I think tears are totally normal. When I got my BFN 2 weeks ago, I pretty much didn't stop crying for the rest of the day :).  

    And about your DH...it seems, from my experience and that of my friends, that guys are often a few steps behind us when it comes to this stuff. I don't know how old you are...I'm 31, and all my pg/new mom friends have said that their DHs took a little longer to allow it to sink in and get excited (in fact, I have one friend whose DH freaked out and literally locked himself in a bathroom for hours after her BFP. Now he's the most devoted dad you could imagine). My DH sounds like yours - he's supportive of the TTC stuff, but would have been fine with waiting another year or two. But he recognizes that the clock is ticking, and that once a LO comes along, he'll fall in love. 

    It sounds like we're in similar situations (except that I have to get some extra assistance in the O department :) We've been "trying" for 6 months, and 4 or 5 of our close friends are pg or have new babies (plus what feels like countless acquaintances and coworkers). I had a really rough time last week - thinking about it 24/7, getting upset each time I opened a magazine ("Guess which celeb is pg?") or logged onto FB and saw more adorable baby photos. A heart-to-heart with DH helped me get my head screwed back on, but I fear I'll backslide once we re-enter the 2ww. Like you, we put off TTC and tried to be responsible - got married, did grad school, weathered unemployment, moved closer to home - before starting TTC, and now I am more than ready!

    Anyway, just wanted you to know you're not alone ;)  Hugs to you!                                     
     
  25. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: March 2011

    Maybe they are more reluctant to be open about it as early...it's hard/impossible to tell if they are behind or just appear to be by their natures.  

    I feel like AF is coming any minute.  She's a day late, but I'm not getting my hopes up - I tested this morning with a "6-day before" test, and since it's already 1 day after I'm pretty sure the BFN is a real BFN.
     

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