October TTC

  1. You have chosen to ignore posts from MissWolff. Show MissWolff's posts

    Re: October TTC

    Wait- 12:47, I was dumb with your name :)

     
  2. You have chosen to ignore posts from MissWolff. Show MissWolff's posts

    Re: October TTC

    Wait- 12:47, I was dumb with your name :)

     
  3. You have chosen to ignore posts from MissWolff. Show MissWolff's posts

    Re: October TTC

    So I'm finally getting a breather here. I just wanted to say thanks to everyone for your condolences and kind words. I am doing ok for the time being, really ok.  I am also still in the thick of it so we'll see how I feel once I'm just back to normal, non-pregnant stage.

    Thus far, the 1st m/c was much more emotional.  I kind of felt like something was wrong this time and of course was already baptized to the fact that things can go wrong.

    I totally hear you all about finding out about other's pregnancies. It seems like such kick at the time.  Most of my friends already have their kids/babies so I'm kind of the lone wolf. No pun intended. :)

    Well I'll be on here more often and have to get up to speed on everyone else's goings ons!  Here's to moving forward...

     

     
  4. You have chosen to ignore posts from jleighla7. Show jleighla7's posts

    Re: October TTC

    MW, glad to hear you're doing ok. I found my first m/c much more emotional as well. Hang in there!

     
  5. You have chosen to ignore posts from siena09. Show siena09's posts

    Re: October TTC

    Yeah, I was so much more guarded during my 2nd pg that the loss felt different.  I didn't feel so intensely bonded/connected to it.  It took longer for the emotions to hit me, and there was a higher ratio of anger and anxiety to grief.  I think the self-preservation mechanisms are very real. 

     
  6. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: October TTC

    Thanks, again, siena.  I'm just as lucky regarding those friends; they are phenomenal people, and sometimes I'm just floored that they count me in their close circle.

    Guarding against hope is seriously helpful for me to side step some of the devastation of crushing disappointments.  If I expect the worst if it happens I'm more prepared and if it doesn't I'm extra happy.  One might call me a pessimist, but the latest studies suggest my long held theory that pessimists are actually the happier bunch for that exact rationale.  If I do get pg again I'll definitely expect to mc for having had it happen before (strictly an emotional association) and for the stats regarding 40-41 year old women.  Then, if I don't it will be the biggest, happiest surprise of my life!  And, if I do, I'll be as prepared as humanly possible...still sad and disappointed, but prepared.

     
  7. You have chosen to ignore posts from MissWolff. Show MissWolff's posts

    Re: October TTC

    Yes, I think I feel very disconnected at this point.  I'm sure it will hit me at some point.

    Kar-  I have to agree with your 'guarding against hope'. I think some people think that sounds negative, however, I prefer to think of myself as a realist, not a pessimist. I'm not negative but I like to be prepared for reality.  It helps me from falling too far.

     
  8. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: October TTC

    Yes, and we aren't alone - like I said, the latest studies on optimists v pessimists is that the old notion of optimists being happier is not true because they fall the farthest and hardest for setting themselves up for the highest and hardest falls all the time.  Ignoring statistics, facts, etc. in favor of "blind optimism" is a painful habit that I've never much understood.  Our expectations largely dictate our happiness more than our circumstances themselves...imo.

    That being said, no matter how prepared you are for something like this, it still hurts and requires a grieving process.  There's no getting around that no matter how realistically you approach life!

    Continued best wishes to you, MW, as you process your loss, and everyone else going through the pain of ttc.  I hope joy and contentment soon finds its way back into everyone's lives without the guilt we so often attach to letting go and living and loving life as is.

     
  9. You have chosen to ignore posts from WhirledPeasPlease. Show WhirledPeasPlease's posts

    Re: October TTC

    Sorry to hear that everyone seems to be dealing with the complex emotions of hearing other people's announcements. It seems like There have been a lot lately. 

    I saw the film of my SIL's first ultrasound. Really amazing...but also difficult to see. My parents are visiting next week and my mom wants to go with me to my RE appt. That's fine, as long as she'll stay in the waiting area. Boundaries. 

     
  10. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: October TTC

    WPP, I'd let your mom know you would appreciate her company in the waiting area only before you get there so the expectation will be in place before the moment comes and she stands up when your name is called.  Best wishes at the RE.

     
  11. You have chosen to ignore posts from tomarra. Show tomarra's posts

    Re: October TTC

    Hey ladies,

    Just checking in and wanted to let you all know that I'm thinking of you guys.

    Misswolf, I'm so sorry for your loss.  Your DH and you are in my thoughts.

    WPP, I can't blame her for wanting to come with you.  It must be hard for her knowing you're having a hard time and probably feels that this one way that to showyou  that she is there for you.  My mother would offer to come when DH couldn't, she could bear the thought of me having to go through it alone.

     SS, I hope this new protocol, while slow moving works for you you.  Sending positive thoughts your way.

     
  12. You have chosen to ignore posts from SSBride09. Show SSBride09's posts

    Re: October TTC

    Thanks tomarra!  I hope so too :)  How's everything going with you?  I think I saw your having a girl and must be pretty far along at this point, congrats!  Its funny, as much as it hurts to hear about most pregnancies... nothing feels better than to hear success stories from people ttc for as long as many of us have.  It's what keeps the optimism I have left alive!

    Kar, interesting information on those studies.  I think I would generally be described as a blind optimist... but its funny what repeated dissappointments will do to that.  I think these days I consider myself more of a realist as well.

     
  13. You have chosen to ignore posts from ALF72. Show ALF72's posts

    Re: October TTC

    So  I get home today and there is a package waiting for me on the steps. It's a newborn feeding kit from Similac, addressed to me in my maiden name.  Nice. 

    I am miffed b/c I had hoped that the P90X that I ordered would be waiting for me and got all excited as I pulled in to the driveway.  lol. No such luck!  No clue who sent it. The tracking number only confirms delivery, not where it originated from.  Bizarro land!  I'm sending it back b/c I sure as heck don't need it!!  LOL! 

     
  14. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: October TTC

    SS, my dh has been moving in that direction, too, and I'm pleased for him that he does, in fact, seem far less disappointed by life's downs simply for being more prepared for them by facts and his own observations that he used to ignore in favor of fantacizing that the perfect outcome will always be what occurs.

    ALF, what the heck?  That's worse than my regularly getting kids' catalogs from llbean and other clothing stores I've ordered adult sized clothes from.  thanks for the reminder I'll never need that stuff, right?  But, a newborn feeding kit?!  That takes the cake.  And, to have it happen when you were hoping for something else just adds insult to injury.  

     
  15. You have chosen to ignore posts from clc51510. Show clc51510's posts

    Re: October TTC

    In response to ALF72's comment:

    So  I get home today and there is a package waiting for me on the steps. It's a newborn feeding kit from Similac, addressed to me in my maiden name.  Nice. 

    I am miffed b/c I had hoped that the P90X that I ordered would be waiting for me and got all excited as I pulled in to the driveway.  lol. No such luck!  No clue who sent it. The tracking number only confirms delivery, not where it originated from.  Bizarro land!  I'm sending it back b/c I sure as heck don't need it!!  LOL! 



    If you haven't already sent it back you can donate it.  That stuff is expensive! I'm sure there is someone that would be happy for the free items.  Also, I'm really sorry you received that in the first place, talk about salt in the wound.

    I still lurk here and wanted to pass along my condolences to MW and all of you ladies that have experienced a loss.  I started tearing up reading your posts last night.  While I hope I never know loss like that it's really comforting to know I will be able to turn to you all if I do.  You're all in my thoughts and prayers.

     
  16. You have chosen to ignore posts from WhirledPeasPlease. Show WhirledPeasPlease's posts

    Re: October TTC

    Sorry to hear that everyone seems to be wading through friends' pregnancy announcements. I went on Facebook last night and there were three...I don't even have that many Facebook friends!

    ALF, I can't believe that was waiting on your doorstep. Unreal. 

    I am secretly glad my mom wants to go with me...and Tomarra, I think you're right that this is hard for her too. It took 9 years for her to get pregnant with me, so she gets it. And Tomarra, how are you?? When is your due date again?

     
  17. You have chosen to ignore posts from siena09. Show siena09's posts

    Re: October TTC

    Alf--I can't believe that!  Ugh.  Not fun.

    WPP--It's nice that your mom can relate (though I'm sorry she had to go through that--9 years?! wow) and I also think that's sweet that she wants to come and be supportive (as long as she is respectful of your boundaries). 

    Hope you ladies have the chance to enjoy the sunshine this weekend a little bit!  Anyone have a spot for leaf-peeping within 90 minutes of Boston that you'd like to recommend?  I'm thinking it's still early enough in the season that I should be planning to head north or west for maximum color. I'm open to suggestions though!

     
  18. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: October TTC

    Siena, check this out - http://northeastfoliage.net/

    If you scroll down, you'll see links for the current best foliage destinations Massachusetts.

     
  19. You have chosen to ignore posts from siena09. Show siena09's posts

    Re: October TTC

    THanks kar!  That's a great website!

     
  20. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: October TTC

    You're welcome - Have fun! It's a great day for a leaf peeping drive.  I'm 70 miles northwest of Boston, and the color is nice.  The non-maples are a little past peak, but the maples are starting to turn so it's gorgeous overall.

     
  21. You have chosen to ignore posts from MissWolff. Show MissWolff's posts

    Re: October TTC

    Tomarra and clc- Thank you, I really appreciate it. It's been a much more trying road that I would have ever anticipated.

    ALF-  That is incredibly strange and obnoxious at the same time.  I now get kid focused catalogs since I've ordered some things for my friend's kids...gee thanks!!

    WPP- When is your appt this week?

    Update here...silver lining...I was able to go through everything naturally this past weekend. I was going to take the medication Friday night but my body started itself in the nick of time. So that was a relief.  Here's to moving on...

     
  22. You have chosen to ignore posts from SSBride09. Show SSBride09's posts

    Re: October TTC

    MW, so glad to hear you didn't have to go the med route.  We're always here for you when you feel ready to give it another go.

    I can't believe it, my egg retrieval is tomorrow morning!!!  Nothing was happening for so long, then all of a sudden this weekend my follicles started growing like crazy and I triggered last night.  Please, please, please let them be able to find at least one good egg tomorrow!!!

    I they do find something to work with I'll know Wednesday if any fertilized and then I may be transferring on Friday.  If I could just make it to transfer at least I'd have some hope this whole IVF thing will work for me eventually and count it as a success.

     
  23. You have chosen to ignore posts from MissWolff. Show MissWolff's posts

    Re: October TTC

    SS- Thanks!

    Wow, that must be very exciting.  I hope it goes smoothly for you and you get some excellent eggs.  Best of luck!  (I was wondering if your meds started to kick in... yay!)

     
  24. You have chosen to ignore posts from kargiver. Show kargiver's posts

    Re: October TTC

    MW, sorry you are going through this, again, but that's good you didn't have to take anything. What a crappy weekend nonetheless.  Hugs!

    SS, best wishes with the retreival and all that goes with it.  If it never worked no one would do it!

     
  25. You have chosen to ignore posts from Chiclet831. Show Chiclet831's posts

    Re: October TTC

    MW - I'm glad to hear that you didn't have to go the med route. It sounds like you're in a lot better spirits. I hope you and your DH are doing okay.

    SS - Good luck tomorrow! I'm so happy that things are finally moving along for you! Fingers crossed!

     
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