In response to your question and answer about "potty trained at daycare but not at home"... My little guy seems to be the same way. He will be 3 in two weeks and my sitter says he has been willing and able to use the big potty and wear underwear at her house. With my husband and I, however, the talk of underwear and the potty brings tears and seemed tress[ful] so we haven't pushed it and have really backed off. My sitter doesn't really seem to agree with this- she now also wants to stop since she claims I am confusing him. I had originality thought she could keep it up at her house and told her so as long as there were no tears and stress since my husband and I aren't comfortable with that. What do you think? Lay off at daycare as well and hope that training at home will come? Or keep it up at daycare and maybe this will help it happen at home too? Thanks so much for your help!!!
From: Catherine, Troy, MI
I disagree with your sitter that it will confuse him to use the potty at her house and not at home. Even young children get the idea that things happen differently in different places. In factd, as you can see from the comments to the original question, it's not unusual at all for kids to be able to use the potty in the daycare setting but not at home. I wonder if maybe she said that in the hopes that it would push/shock you into taking a stronger position at home. But to back off and put him back in diapers at daycare would be shaming him and, in my opinion, create more problems, not fewer. I wonder, in fact, if your sitter is so firm on this because she's a aggravated with you, the adults?
I have two suggestions for you and your husband: decide how you want to proceed at home with the potty training (the advice I offered two days ago, link above) and decide how you want to proceed with your sitter. I don't mean that you need to make a change, but I would encourage you to examine your relationship with her and the communication among the adults. Why is she taking such a hard and seemingly punitive stance?
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