From: Natasha, Baton Rouge, LA

For a variety of reasons, we have decided to put our house on the market and move to another town where she won't know anyone. Unfortunately, she will be in school for a month or two and she will have to switch schools. We are confident that this will be a good move for the family in the long run. Any advice on what we should tell her now and what can we do to make this "second transition" easier?

From: Vanessa, Worcester, MA

I'm considering holding him back, but I'm not sure how to make that decision. The school he's in is great, but because he's on an IEP, I've been led to believe (by my own peers) that they will not consider holding him back with the same consideration as a typically developing student. His teachers have commented (lovingly) that he's a "very young" 6. (They mean emotionally.)

There seems to be so much polarizing information out there, I don't even know where to begin. To complicate things, his sibling is one grade behind, so if my son is held back, he would forever more be in the same grade as his brother; this decision impacts both of their lives in a very direct way.

My son is very sweet, bright and imaginative, and very sensitive emotionally. He doesn't have many friends his own age - somehow they are all a year or two older or younger.

My fear is that he will always be struggling to catch up, which will eventually wear away at his confidence and his ability to love learning.

I'm fearful of the "social stigma" of keeping him back a year, however there's no guarantee that he's not going to get picked on anyway because of his learning issues. In his mind, staying back a year might not be a big deal, but I don't dare ask him because I don't want to tip my hand, and he has no real power over this decision.

Can you point me towards some sources that would help me make this huge decision? Obviously, I'm fearful of making a mistake.

Thanks!
From: Kate in Southie, South Boston

Thank you!
From: Carolyn, Plaistow, NH

Our family will be moving some time in the next year or year and a half, and we are trying to figure out the timing. I'd like your advice on how traumatic a mid-year school change would be for our 4-year-old son, as opposed to one during the summer. He just turned 4, and is in a private 3-day-a week preschool now, where he's doing well. He's smart but naturally cautious and self-conscious, and our main worries about him are social, as he's slow to warm up to new friends and situations. His current preschool teacher says he's been starting to initiate interactions with other kids lately, though, which we've been thrilled to hear.

He will start kindergarten next year, and we're debating 3 different scenarios; a) to move this summer and have him start a new school in September (it would be a little difficult to do the move this soon for financial reasons, and it may entail actually moving twice, though the second move would be within the same town); b) to stay where we are, have him start a new school year in a new class at either his current private school or at the local public school, and then move mid-year (this second option would entail starting out with my husband having a 45 minute commute); or c) waiting another full year in our current location, then moving the summer after his first year of kindergarten (but with Daddy having a long commute all year).

So I guess my question is: will changing schools be easier or harder as he gets older? Is a mid-year school change likely to be as traumatic for him as it was for me when my family moved when I was in 3rd grade? (I was shy, too, and it was very hard). Would you judge that a longer commute for Daddy would be as hard as changing schools?
Thanks so much for any advice!

From: Carriefran, Boston

My 6 year old has the possible opportunity to move from his current school into another school in the community. I wouldn't say this other school is "better," it's just a different teaching style that my husband and I feel might be better for him and his academic success.

Our dilemma is the idea of moving him mid year from a school he loves and has gotten comfortable being a part of, to a "new" school that while good, is just different.
We know he'll make friends eventually. We know he'll adjust, but is this the right thing to do??

I also mourn the thought of leaving his current school and the friendships I've developed over the last 1 1/2 years.

I know only we can make the decision. I know I can get information from both sides of the aisle. I guess we just need to know if moving him mid year is going to be okay for his social development and won't backfire on us in the end.
Thank you-

From: WantingWhatsBest, Merrimac Valley, MA

My son is 18 months old, and very bright, though I admit extreme bias in this case. My husband and I were judged to be very bright as well, but we suffered in school when it came to math. We want to give our son the best start in life without being overzealous parents who torture their child with flashcards practically from the womb.

What can we do to help promote an understanding of, and a love for math without making it tedious? What we are doing so far is reading him counting board books, singing songs involving numbers, and doing the "2, 4, 6, 8, who do we appreciate?" cheer for him, which he adores. Is there anything else we can do? At what point do we add some formal activities or toys? We don't want to become "those parents" who's zeal has squeezed the fun out of learning.

Thanks in advance!
From: MP, Framingham, MA

My daughter is very bright but a little immature due to her size. Also kids always teased her because of it. She worked hard in first grade and her teachers were proud of her progress. During the year she was part of a small group that needed extra help with reading. At the end of the year, the teachers recommended her promotion to 2nd grade. I feel that retaining her in first grade would be beneficial and give her confidence. I would like an expert opinion..I'm agonizing over this decision.. Thank you

From: Leena, Virginia Beach, VA

I have found myself in a very awkward situation with the mother of my son's friend. First, I read in the local police log that she had been arrested for trying to fraudulently obtain prescription drugs. That truly surprised me, as I would never have guessed she might have a drug problem. She had a job, a husband and seemingly middle class life.

However, I have noticed missing bottles of medication from my bathroom (my prescription medication) after she visits. I also noticed that the times she has been to my house, she asks to use the bathroom, even if she is just picking up her son.

So, I have already relocated my medicines to another place in the house to avoid any more theft. However, I do not feel I can trust her with my son. At this point, my husband and I agree that her son can come over for playdates but no playdates at the friend's house. Do you have any further thoughts or advice about this odd situation? I'm really not certain about talking to her about this, since I think she will just deny everything.

Thanks.