From: Teri, Lodi, NY

From: Anne, Acton, MA

From: Marie, Melrose, MA

My question is related to my almost 3 year old daughter. Her father and I have been split up since she was a little over a year old, and she does not see him anymore (but she still knows who he is and sees his family every week).

My current boyfriend and I have been together for over a year, but she has known him her whole life. Things were rough at first between them, she would cry whenever he would be around or show any affection toward me. I thought it was just jealousy and that she would eventually understand that she was number 1 and that I wasn't going anywhere. It did stop for a little while, until we moved in together. Now things are much worse. She cries at almost everything he tries to do with her (playing, feeding, dressing, etc.)

I don't know what to do at this point. I have tried everything. I will sit with her and try to explain he is just trying to play with her or whatever it may be, But she will just cry and look to me or run in her room, and she can literally sit in her room and cry for 10-15 minutes; but it's not even a real cry, it's like shes faking to get my attention. It is putting alot of stress and fighting in the relationship, and I am running out of options! I need advice on what to do when she cries, how do I get her to stop and how do I get her to realize he is just trying to be nice to her? And what could my boyfriend be doing differently? He is a very nice man and has always been there for her in the nicest way.

I hope you have some advice for me! Thank you

From: Nicole, Portland (state not given)

My 23-month old is biting a lot at daycare, usually 3+ times a week for the past month or so. She does not bite at home. Daycare is concerned enough to want to test her for development and personality issues. She is highly verbal and highly possessive of "her" things ("Mine" may be her favorite word) and from the teacher's reports, most of the biting is usually over a toy and she usually uses her words before biting. Otherwise, she is really easy going child and while she has her moments, she is easily distracted out of them and her tantrums usually last for only 1-2 minutes.

The classroom she is in includes 10 other children, all within 3 months of her age and 2-3 teachers. She has been at this daycare since she was 2 months old and most of the children have been together the entire time.

Each time she has bit, we talk about it and I express to her the need to be "nice and gentle" with her friends. The teachers say they respond by removing her from the situation and have tried to offer her teethers.

We went to a pediatric dentist 2 months ago (regularly scheduled visit and not biting related) and he said all her teeth were in, so I do not think she is teething.

What do you think could be causing the biting? Because she is so verbal compared to her peers, could she be frustrated by their lack of verbal skills? As she is not biting in front of me, what can I do as a parent do reinforce the "no biting?" Is she too young to offer rewards/punishments hours after the biting incident (a sticker for making it through the day without biting?) What do you think of the daycare's suggestion for developmental and personality testing?

Thank you!
From: Mom of biting toddler, Boston area

I'd like to stop breastfeeding for my 1-year old daughter, Rina, because she is going to become 2 years old in 2 months! But she loves to continue it. How can I stop it? Every time I ask her if I can stop it or not, she refuses it strongly.

From: Masako, Japan

From: Sarah, Avon, MA

I'm the mom of an almost 2 1/2 year old little girl. She is a very happy, outgoing, joyful kid who has tons of energy. The reason I'm writing is because I'm having an awful lot of trouble getting her to eat at home, or I should say with her father and me. Whether it's breakfast, lunch or dinner at home, or in a restaurant- she just doesn't eat much at all. She'll pick at a couple of things, or it'll take her upwards of an hour to eat the simplest things. I'm very afraid of giving her eating issues like I have, so I don't force her to sit in front of her plate till it's cleaned, nor do I make a big deal out of giving sweets or any food as rewards. However, when she spends the day at my parents house, or the homes of friends who help me out w/ babysitting from time to time, they all report that she eats non-stop! I've been told she'll eat 2-3 helpings of something that she'd never eat at home, if my parents take her to a restaurant, she eats everything AND picks at their food too. What gives? I joke that I'm just going to drop her off at different houses for meals just so she'll eat something. What am I doing wrong, or what can I do to get her to eat well when she's with us?

Thanks!

From: tlo, Meddford, MA

My mother passed away over 17 years ago, and my father has since re-married a wonderful woman named "Ruth". I have a very good relationship with Ruth - we talk a few times a week on the phone, go shopping together and generally enjoy eachother's company.

When my daughter was born two years ago, I never hesitated in having her call my step-mother "Grandma Ruth". My daughter loves spending time with her Grandma Ruth and the two of them have developed a very special relationship that I'm sure will continue in the years to come, which I'm very happy about.

My question is, how and what do I say to explain the unique family circumstances to my daughter? She is just starting to understand families and the idea of parents, siblings, aunts, uncles and cousins, and she loves to look at our family picture albums. I've shown her pictures of my mother and I refer to my mother as Grandma "Sally". So far, she hasn't raised the fact that she hasn't met Grandma Sally but I know that she will eventually ask me where Grandma Sally is and/or whether Grandma Ruth is my mommy.

How do I explain it all to her in an age appropriate manner? The lesson I'd like to convey is that good things (Having Grandma Ruth be part of her life) came come out of bad things (not meeting Grandma Sally). But I know someday I will have to explain the concept of death and dying to her, and I'd like to have a pre-school appropriate response so I am not caught off-guard.

Thanks, From: Motherless Daughter, Newton, MA