Sign up Dennis for a variety of things, let him try them out, and eventually he will probably focus on things he likes best and is good at.

Sorry that you have regrets, but using your child to smooth over your past insecurities or somehow "relive" your childhood is never a good idea (I think you know that). But I can see a need to redirect his energy :).

If he has the motivation to play at age 5, great - if not, do not push. Starting kids in team sports this young is no guarantee that you will have a superstar on your hands by high school.

Over parenting and over stimulating your child with a very booked schedule only produces annoying fidgety kids who are either unable to withstand 5 seconds of quiet time (and prove it to you every waking moment) or become major procrastinators.
Those that do, feel pushed to do everything and thus, in later life, get edgy when it comes time to actually do anything. I've been a nanny for 28 years for 4 different families and have seen the mistakes that parents make and overstimulation and over scheduling a child's day is one of them.

My 7 year old son has been exposed to many different sports,hockey baseball,soccer,golf etc. My wife has him and his 5 year old brother going all day long. I feel it gives them plenty of exposure to different sports,and also helps them to decide which, or maybe all of the sports they want to play. If they decide not to play,then that's also fine. Beware though dorchesterd. My boys want to play them all, and they seem to run into each other. we are playing hockey in winter,and baseball in spring '' for now''. Good luck,and keep him and yourself going.

I don't understand why you imply that a kid who would rather watercolor, practice the arts or read books isn't going to be sporty. When I was young I did all of the above and see that in my own children as well. Don't think your child has to be one over the other. Exposing them to a variety of options is key, but don't push them to be anything they don't want to be.

Hey, Erica! Thanks for the laugh! It's GREAT to be a grandmother!!!

More power to you! Get the kid out of the house and expend some energy in a beneficial way. He'll meet kids outside of school, improve his co-ordination and maybe get him on a track to lifelong confidence.

I started swimming when I was three, dropped it at 14, and returned to it a year ago. Now, at 26 with a kid on the way, my swim teammates are my lifeline! None of us skip practice unless we have a good excuse and tiredness ain't one of them. This means that even when we don't feel like it, we leave work problems at work and burn a few calories - almost always feeling better for it after practice.

Assuming he is in half-day kindergarten, sign him up for as much as you can this year. When he is in first grade next year, he won't have enough energy to do an activity after school every day - you will probably have to limit it to two weekdays (but you still will have the weekends). This way he can do a total of seven activities this year which will be cut down to four in first grade.

In many sports outstanding players start playing their sport by the age of 5 (football and golf might be 6 or 7). It's up to you to help him figure out what sport he enjoys while he still has time to reach his full potential.

Yeah, I'm a 24-y/o veteran of the superprogrammed childhood- had everything from soccer to hockey to three different instruments and French lessons in second grade-but wound up working my way through the Commonwealth of Massachusetts' "Schedule of Controlled Substances" by the time I finished high school(sort of, I got my GED). I'm estranged from my uber-parents- Dad's a partner in a big Boston CPA firm and Mom's a lawyer of course- I work odd jobs- let kids be kids for Petes sake-google "Free Range Kids".....

Here is the best parenting advice I got. Pay attention, couch-potato mom:

"Kids do what you do."

If only that were true Tom! Then Dennis would watch a lot of Masterpiece Theatre and be asking why we can't go to IKEA today. But I can always hope! :-) -EN

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Erica

Thank you for your honest and transparent thoughts re: your 5 year old - - allowing kids to play multiple sports is something that we have done with our 3 boys - BUT most importantly PLEASE encourage your 'athletic' kid to be a good sportsman as well - nothing worse than a good athlete who hogs the ball and is encouraged to do so by sideline annoying parents - I just annoy the refs once in a while - haha!!! I enjoyed your article

"Letting kids be kids" doesn't mean letting them run rampant without discipline. Where did that straw man come from? I give my twin 3yo boys lots of activities, and even some TV, but I always make sure to give them time to do their own thing, no direction and no TV. There are ground rules and they know it, and if they forget I remind them, so no appliances get broken and no oil gets spilled on the floor. The joy of seeing them eventually settle down and do something on their own like enjoying a book or building something is unparalleled! I also think it's a 'skill' which will help them a great deal later in life. There won't always be someone in their life to tell them what to do next...

Erica - I'm a dad who tried to live vicariously through my oldest son - he became a terrific high school quarterback, but never touched a football thereafter. In fact, he turned down scholarship offers to play in college. He couldn't wait to move on from it (as well as my meddling.) I matured, and my youngest daughter, who I encouraged only to do her best in everything she tried, was near the top of her class academically, a sports team captain, and continues to run Cross Country and Track in college (her idea.) "Letting kids be kids" worked better . . . for both of us!

Isn't this an addiction? Why not try to get them interested in reading and exploring history? Our country became what it is by having the best educated population. We now seem to be interested in having the best team of gladiators! Our expenditures on "Gladiator training" exceed the rest of the world combined.

Brings to mind the fall of Rome.

I think you've got it half right. Kids certainly need structure, and sports (in my opinion) are the greatest activity for both physical and social development. Definitely involve your kids in sports, as many as possible, but do it for them - not for you. That's where things get twisted, when the parents are thinking of themselves and how to artificially create a "super-kid", instead of being concerned with raising a happy/well adjusted kid. Other activities are obviously important as well, like music and arts - but the tricky part is balance. Discipline them, yes, but don't overload them, and don't push/pressure them to do things they don't want to do. If you think "Let kids be kids" is crazy talk, then I think you're crazy. One day you will miss the broken appliances and pools of vegetable oil. Good luck.

Dear Dung, thanks for reading and writing in -- I will take my chances re: missing the pools of vegetable oil and broken appliances. But I think you have a point about superkids, as you and some of the other posters said, that is a way to create really miserable children. I don't intend to make Dennis continue on with any activities he doesn't actually enjoy, as people here said, it never works to force them.

And to the commenter who just wrote in to tell me how fat I am and how I should hit the gym more, can you resend your note? I accidently deleted it. -EN