The nonprofit group where Sadie Dingfelder works was looking for a new Web designer a few months ago. And so when she met an unemployed friend of a friend at a party who told her he had just that background, she thought she could help.
``It sounded like he had a lot of experience," she said. She kindly told him to send her his resume and she would assist him. As an editor, she figured she could look it over, give him some tips, and then forward the resume to the hiring managers.
Dingfelder's offer is every job seeker's dream: an ``in" that will help his resume stand out among hundreds that are e-mailed or sent to ``To whom it may concern."
But there is an ugly underbelly to networking, as Dingfelder soon discovered.
She quickly received a cover letter and resume from the guy, written in rambling, stream-of-consciousness prose. Both were full of errors and red flags -- the kind that would cause any hiring manager to toss the resume into the trash. But Dingfelder didn't give up. This guy had good experience, and she'd said she would help. So she went into editing mode and sent the letter back with all sorts of (somewhat snarky) comments. (``You might want to have a subject and a verb here" and ``You probably don't want to mention interpersonal problems you've had with previous bosses in this cover letter.")
The applicant then sent the ``corrected" cover letter to the hiring manager and to Dingfelder. With the comments still attached.
``Now I'm afraid that I can't recommend other people," she said.
No doubt.
It is well established that if we have a decent relationship with someone within a company where we want a job, our resume will likely go to the top of the pile.
And so we network. Or we think about networking. Or we think about how to network.
But all of that networking talk can lead to networking nightmares. Many people are overwhelmed by the number of requests they receive after a cocktail party to chat about their company. Others are afraid their reputation will plummet if they recommend someone who is just all wrong. And many others are flummoxed by the audacity of some people who come to them with demands -- all in the name of networking.
Over-networking is probably one of the biggest complaints among people on the receiving end of the conversation.
Vickie Gray fits into the overwhelmed category, though she understands the importance of networks. She had let her network lapse a few years ago, then found herself in the position of needing to ask for references. She knew she could not simply ask someone she hadn't seen in two years for a favor. ``I just vowed I would never let my network lapse again," she said.
And amid rebuilding her network, she offered much guidance herself. Unfortunately, being in a niche field of professional-services marketing, she now finds that her desire to help is sort of backfiring.
She is bombarded with e-mails, requests for lunch, and people asking for recommendations for vendors. Helping was ``something I'd always done," said Gray, the director of marketing for a law firm. But lately she has felt as if she has to stop.
Networking should be a mutually beneficial relationship, said Heather Hamilton, staffing programs manager for
But some people ask for too much, such as contact information for other divisions or people, or to put Hamilton on their online list of networks. ``Because people read my blog, they feel like they know me. And I want them to feel comfortable reaching out to me," she said. But, she is a marketing recruiter and simply can't be an ``in" to every stranger who wants to work at her mammoth company.
Her advice? ``If you're going to network, know what you're trying to get out of it," she said. ``Tap into people you have something in common with, whether it's a mutual friend or an industry you're in."
She relies mostly on professional organizations, which is how she has made most of her contacts and finds new employees. When someone posts to her blog looking for a contact in another department, or when readers get snippy with her when she says she can't help, that's not networking. It's socially awkward begging. And begging is never attractive. Which is why Hamilton advises both on her blog and to her friends to establish a network before it's actually needed. ``You want that already in place, so you can go back to them to help you in your career search."
