Strapping young woman

Dearest Rihanna,

What is going on here? Shards and strings of fabric do not a shirt make. Don't you have an extra Balmain military jacket lying around or a spare umbrella? Cover thyself, woman!

I get edgy. I do. But you're taking it to the extreme. As in, you took a razor's edge to your top and bra and then wore the whole contraption to Paris Fashion Week. I'm clucking my tongue. You're making me cluck my tongue. For the love of Jay-Z, wear something flattering. No more bondage.

xoxo,
Courtney

[Photo by Pascal Le Segretain / Getty Images]