Waiter, there's a [ . . . ] in my wine

The online version of my column in the Food pages this morning has the headline "Among wine lovers, the word is minerality."   

For SEO (search engine optimization) reasons, editors routinely alter the headline when they are posted to bostonglobe.com. In the physical newspaper the  column appeared under the headline "Waiter, there's a rock in my wine."

A reader who's eye was caught by the original hed decided there were many other wine stories that needed to be written along these lines. He suggests:

1. Waiter, there's a stock in my wine: Another major domaine sold to AXA
2. Waiter, there's a frock in my wine: Fashion industry sets up World HQ in Bordeaux
3. Waiter, there's a sock in my wine: John Henry buys Chateau Latour.
4. Waiter, there's a bock in my wine: Beer and wine industries amalgamate.
5. Waiter, there's a knock in my wine: Dig baby dig policy produces continuous petroleum odor in major world vineyards, not just in Germany.
6. Waiter, there's an Ewok in my wine: George Lucas buys The Cote de Nuits.
7. Waiter, there's a flock in my wine: Donald Trump says he'll start a vineyard on the salt meadows at le Mont St-Michel.
8. Waiter, there's a glock in my wine: NRA lobbies for guns to be sold in 'packies', giving that store a whole new meaning.
9. Waiter, there's a hock in my wine: German wines finally get some respect.
10. Waiter, there's a lock in my wine: Lo jack device in every bottle.

I'll add another:  Waiter, there's a clever reader in my wine.

Stephen Meuse can be reached at bytheglass@globe.com

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