Look at me, I'm Sandra Lee, lousy with poesy

Oh, the pain. And don't tell me I'm not patriotic. I just have sensitive ears.

Here's the Fourth of July greeting sent out by Sandra Lee, host of the Food Network's "Semi-Homemade Cooking," a show in which she espouses her philosophy of using 70 percent ready-made products and 30 percent fresh.

The concept of "semi-homemade" makes me wince almost as much as the lines "So frolic with friends and family/ It's as fun as fun can be."

On the back of the card is a recipe for something called, alternately, Savory Red, Blue & White Hots and Saucy White Hots. So far as I can tell, this dish would be neither red, blue, & white, nor simply white. Looks like (semi-homemade) chili dogs to me: ground beef cooked with beef broth, "spicy steak seasoning," chili sauce, cinnamon, and defrosted frozen chopped onions over grilled brats on rolls. Methinks you don't need the recipe to re-create this if you choose.

Music writer Sarah Rodman came by my desk and rapped the poem. It sounded much better that way. Unfortunately, the digital recorder was not at hand.

Happy Fourth of July!